Turnabout's Fair Play
by Elanquest
Summary: All's fair in love and war. Some sexual situations and violence.
1. Chapter 1:  Welcome Back

No copyright infringement intended blah, blah, blah.

This story is a stand alone at this time.

Chapter 1: Welcome back

Caitlin surveyed the board for the week. She'd just returned from a four day charter and needed to get up to speed. She'd had a great four days. Two female designers had insisted on a female pilot to take them to a design show. She spent most of the time by the pool catching up on her reading, but she also indulged in the spa on more than one occasion. She was a little disappointed when the clients announced they would return two days early. Now, her working "vacation" was over; so, she had to get down to real work.

"Hey Dom, what's this spot for Hawke? All it says is CC," Cait asked.

"Huh? Oh, he picked up a student."

"Wonder how long that will last?" Cait smirked to herself. Hawke wasn't known to be the most patient of teacher's though he could usually make it through a little over an hour at a time. Generally either she or Dom took the students so they would last for more than one lesson.

"They seem to be getting along just fine," Dom answered absently. "He's taking her out to dinner tonight."

"Typical," Cait bit her lower lip.

"What?" Dom looked up from the flight plan he was figuring out.

"Nothing, I was just going to get started on that overhaul."

"Then get started already and quit interrupting me," he groused.

"Yeah, yeah, yeah," she rejoined as she headed out to the hangar.

String strolled over to the pair of cover all clad legs sticking out from under one of Santini's choppers. For some reason he was in a better mood today than he had been for the last few. Caitlin was back. He refused to connect her absence and return to his mood. Besides he was taking CC back to the cabin later, and that definitely didn't have anything to do with Cait. Still, he couldn't help the smile on his face as he looked down on his friend and co-worker.

"Not back but a few hours and already sucking up to the boss," he teased.

"Well, some of us do have to _work_ for a living," Cait shot back.

"You just had four days of poolside fun, for _work_, while some of us were back here working our tails off and giving _lessons_ no less."

"Oh yeah, it was such a burden that you're taking your _student_ out to dinner. What do you plan on _teaching_ her, how to catch and release?" She couldn't help the smirk.

"I could always _school_ you over lunch." He shot back before thinking.

Caitlin rolled out from under the chopper.

"You're on," she said with a smile and just a touch of gotcha. "But, I get to pick where we go."

Hawke frowned. He hadn't really meant to ask her out, but what harm could it do. They were friends after all and they'd had lunch together before. And, he had missed her while she was gone. But, she hadn't taken him up on the prospect of eating together for a while now.

Caitlin carefully hid her disappointment at his reaction. She was getting almost as good as Hawke at hiding her true feelings. Since he was determined that they would forever be nothing more than friends, she'd put some of her acting classes to good use.

"Don't look so excited at the prospect Hawke," Caitlin said seeing the sour expression on his face. "I promise it won't hit your wallet too hard. Besides, you might actually _learn_ a thing or two."

With that she rolled back under the chopper to continue with her work and ended the conversation.

Lunch proved to be informative. Hawke told her about the jobs they'd had while she was gone. Caitlin told him all about her four days out. She chatted about her spa experience of being pampered. She described her new two piece swim suit to him which he admitted to himself, if not to her, that he'd like to see. And, she told him all about the charter clients. The two women had started their product design firm out of the garage. They were now well on their way to handling eco-friendly packaging for everything from stereo systems to candy bars. He found the time passed more quickly than he could have guessed.

As they walked back to the hangar, they each had an arm around the others waist in friendly companionship.

"Maybe Dom will let you tag along next time. We're going to Las Vegas for a whole week. And, they guaranteed no coming back early."

"What would I do there? Hold your sun-tan lotion?" he quipped. "It's too crowded."

"Oh, I don't know Hawke," she said with a sly smile as she stepped over to the chopper she had to get back to working on. "I'm sure we could _learn_ a lot about each other in Vegas. After all they're almost as famous for _private_ lessons as you are."

She ducked as he threw a greasy rag in her direction. It hit the side of the chopper leaving a brown smear down the side.

"Hey, you're going to clean that up."

"Make me," he laughed as he walked away.


	2. Chapter 2:  The Other Woman

Chapter 2: The other woman

Caitlin sat at Dom's desk finishing up some last minute paperwork. Dom had already left and she admitted to herself that she had only volunteered for the chore so that she could catch a glimpse of Hawke's student/date.

She sighed to herself and wondered why she wanted to torture herself. She had wanted for some time now for more to happen between her and Hawke. Before she'd gone to the design conference she thought they were making progress all though slowly.

She had realized that any time she had actually hinted at a deeper relationship Hawke would back off drastically. Usually he would find some beautiful sophisticated woman to date and be seen with. So she had decided to put that aspect of things on the back burner and just have a great friend. She began to notice that he started to spend a lot more time with her just hanging out as friends. He wasn't afraid to hug and give her light kisses on the cheek either. Before she'd left on the charter he hadn't been out with anyone for quite some time. And, she had to admit that the easy banter they'd long enjoyed had been taking on a more suggestive tone with double meanings abounding.

_I guess you were just imaging things, Caity me girl,_ she thought. She heard a woman's laughter out in the hangar and glanced through the door. She didn't see anyone, but guessed that Hawke and his student were just about to set off. As he came into view heading straight for the office she ducked her gaze hoping he hadn't noticed her craning her neck.

"Cait," he said to catch her attention.

She looked up and froze at the sight of the woman walking up behind him. The tall brunette slipped her arm through his and clung to him.

Hawke noticed her reaction and stiffened himself wondering what had put her on guard. Cait seemed to be fine with his going out with someone when they'd teased each other earlier in the day.

"CC and I were just about to leave."

The woman beside him cleared her throat.

Hawke glanced at her.

"Oh, sorry. CC this is Caitlin. We work together. Cait this is CC."

"Why Caitlin," CC said in a southern accent. "It's so nice to see you again."

She extended her hand.

Cait stood up but ignored the hand.

"Carrie?" Cait was dumbfounded. She had thought that this was one person from her past that she'd _never_ see again.

"You two know each other?"

Caitlin recovered her speech only with tremendous will. "_Knew_ each other," she corrected giving CC a cold stare. "But that was a long time ago."

"Funny," CC said lightly, "it only seems like last week to me. My, how time flies. I had no idea you'd moved to California. And look, you're a secretary for an air service, how nice. Whatever happened to your ambition of being in law enforcement?"

Caitlin set her jaw and the fire flashed in her eyes. She crossed her arms in front of her and widened her stance. Hawke recognized Cait's temper flaring and quickly intervened.

"CC," Hawke interrupted, "Can you go on out and start the chopper? I've just got to grab my coat."

"Certainly, Hawke," she smiled sweetly and gave him a swift kiss on the cheek. "Don't be long." She turned and walked from the office without a backwards glance.

"What was that all about?" he turned on Caitlin.

Caitlin stared at the retreating woman as if her glare could burn a hole in the others back. "Nothing Hawke," Caitlin said. She gave him a slight glance. "It was a long time ago." She sat heavily back in the chair.

"You sure it's not something else?" He raised an eyebrow.

"Like what?" She said with a defensive edge.

"Like how do you know her?" he demanded.

Caitlin looked him in the eye for a long moment considering. Finally she said, "It doesn't matter. Look just, be careful around her okay. She has a tendency to latch on and…cause a lot of chaos." She looked like she wanted to say more but didn't.

"I can take care of myself."

"Not with someone like her," a note of caution permeated her voice. "She's the type to have you all tied up before you even know it. So, _please_ be careful." At the look on his face, she added, "for me?"

"What are you jealous?" He flung at her as he retrieved his coat from the rack beside the door.

Hawke couldn't understand her sudden concern and refusal to talk about why. He'd always thought she could and did tell him practically everything.

If she hadn't of come back from her charter two days earlier than planned, she never would have known about CC anyway. He had wanted to spare her feelings. He knew how she felt, but had reasons of his own for not going there. He had decided when she quit pushing that he'd at least try not to flaunt anyone in her face. He knew it caused her pain when he'd hook up for one of his short term flings. He cared too much for her to do that to her anymore. Besides he hadn't been with anyone in a long time and had recently found himself more and more drawn to Caitlin. If it wasn't for Airwolf and all of those complications, he wouldn't have any trouble telling Cait what a beautiful and intelligent woman he thought she was. He would have no reservations to having a long term even a lift time relationship with her. But, lately even though their teasing had become more suggestive, she was pulling away from him. It seemed to him that maybe she had finally accepted that they'd never be more than friends and was getting on with her life. He had started to count on her being there for him, but recently she'd gone out with some guy rather than having dinner with him. It had bothered him more than he liked to admit even to himself. Hawke knew he was too close. He had to take action, CC.

"I'm going to see who I want, Caitlin especially if you're not willing to talk about why I shouldn't. You're not my mother, or sister. Hell we've never even been on a date. Why don't you just leave me alone?"

"If nothing else, Hawke, you _are_ my friend, and I care what happens to you," she said hotly.

"No one asked you to." He shot back as he left the office to join CC.

Swaying to the music playing softly in the background Hawke held CC in a warm embrace. He had been going to seduce her tonight. Not that he thought he'd have much trouble on that score, but what Caitlin had said at the hangar kept coming back to him. Each time he started to make his move he heard Cait's warning.

"She's in love with you."

"What?" Hawke pulled back slightly and looked into CC's warm brown eyes.

"Caitlin. She's in love with you." CC said. "She probably would have warned you off me if given half the chance."

Hawke's reaction gave her the conformation that Cait had done exactly that.

"We're just friends," he stated avoiding the half asked question.

"It doesn't matter Hawke. The same thing happened in college. I'll understand if you don't want to see me anymore." There was regret and sympathy in her eyes. "How long have you two known each other anyway?"

"About two years."

CC nodded knowingly. "She's probably your best friend. She's always there for you, undemanding, even steps out of the way when you start to date someone. But," she sighed, "she's always waiting in the wings when your relationship falls apart ready to be the comforter. It took about two years in college."

"What took two years?" Hawke couldn't help himself. He wanted to know what had happened between CC and Caitlin.

"I'm sorry. I've already said too much. Maybe you should just take me home now. No harm done. Okay?" She rubbed his arms with her hands in a comforting gesture.

"No, it's not okay." Hawke grasped her shoulders. "Look I just want you to be straight with me."

CC sighed again. "Okay but, then will you take me home?"

"Tell me the truth and I'll take you anywhere you want to go."

CC and Hawke crossed over to the sofa and got comfortable. After a moment CC started her tale with a faraway look in her eyes.

"Cait and I were assigned to the same dorm room our freshman year. We became great friends. We did practically everything together. I introduced her to my longtime boyfriend during fall break. Everything seemed to be fine. Carl and I had an on again off again thing in college. Cait was always there for me. Only I didn't know she was also always there for him too. She slowly started to wedge herself between us. When that didn't work to her satisfaction she…she started getting into trouble. The kind of trouble only Carl could rescue her from. First, it was simple things like her car breaking down in the middle of nowhere. It didn't take long before it escalated. She was almost raped on campus, then her boyfriend went psycho and tried to kill her. I don't deny she was in real trouble, but somehow she managed to attract the trouble just at the right time. It was usually when Carl and I started to get real close. She drew Carl in until…."

A tear fell from CC's cheek. She was silent for a while visibly trying to hold back tears and keep herself together.

Hawke gently wiped the tears from her cheek. His touch seemed to bring her back from the past. She sniffled a little before continuing.

"…until one day Carl went to save her and didn't come back." Tears started streaming down her cheeks now. "He'd…just…just asked me…to…to marry him."

Hawke pulled the obviously distraught woman to him. He held her while she cried herself out.

"I'm sorry to break down on you like that," she said as she wiped the last of the tears away. "I haven't talked about it since it all happened."

"Hey, it's okay. It was a hard thing to go through." Hawke wasn't sure how much he believed of CC's story, but it did seem to mirror his experiences with Cait. The first time he'd seen her she was just about to be…abused and then that whole thing with Holly was…well different. She'd been high-jacked, kid-napped, and held hostage since then and it sort of did fit with when he was seeing someone, not entirely though.

CC started to get up, but was shaking badly.

Hawke sat her back down.

"Hey it's late. Why don't you stay here tonight?"

"Oh I should be fine. The flight to the hangar should be enough to calm me down." She tried to stand again and her knees wobbled.

"You're upset and shaken. Look you can sleep in the bed. I'll take the couch."

She started to protest and he cut her off.

"It's my house let me be a gentleman if I want to."

Hawke escorted her up to the sleeping loft and brought her a glass of cold water.

"Thank you," CC said, "for everything."

Hawke gave her smile and headed down the stairs.

The next day when Hawke and CC landed on the tarmac Cait was watching from the hangar door. His words from the night before still rang in her ear. She knew they'd spent the night at the cabin together despite her warning to Hawke. She had thought that he'd trust her a little more than that after all they'd been through.

CC and Hawke saw her standing in the shadows but both pretended not to.

"I know we had plans later. But if you'd rather not, I understand." CC tried to let him off the hook. She let her disappointment show and glanced at the hangar.

Hawke followed her glance. He had no reason not to see CC again just because she and Caitlin had some history whatever the true story was.

"No," Hawke said as he turned to give her a smile. "I'll still pick you up at eight."

"I'm sure Caitlin won't like that. I don't want to come between two friends." She placed a hand gently on his arm.

"Caitlin doesn't determine who I see." He gave her a small smile.

CC leaned over and they kissed.

Caitlin couldn't really hide her displeasure despite all her acting classes. She also couldn't watch anymore but went back to the repairs she'd started the day before. Pouring herself into her work was the best way she knew to hide her feelings. She barely even registered the sound of CC's car when it left.

Hawke entered the hangar ten minutes later. He headed straight for the coffee.

Dom slapped him on the back causing him to spill some of the coffee.

"It's about time you showed up. I'm not paying you for unscheduled early morning flight lessons. Or, were they late night flight lesson?" Dom chuckled. "Well, I can say one thing at least she's a looker."

Hawke scowled at him while he made a show of refilling his spilled coffee.

"Someone must have woke up on the wrong side of the bed this morning. You're usually all smiles after taking a beautiful woman up to your cabin. What's a matter didn't she like Tet?"

"Lay off Dom." Hawke stole a glance at Caitlin who was at the top of a latter her head stuck in the chopper.

"Geesh! How come you're so sensitive all of a sudden? All I did was compliment you on your date," Dom said as he headed out to talk to Everett. He hadn't missed Hawke's furtive glance at Cait and hoped the boy was starting to get a little sense in that department. He's seen how Cait had been withdrawing while still keeping up appearances with Hawke. _If String's not careful, he's going to lose a lot more than his best friend when that girl finally has enough and leaves, _he thought.

Hawke stalked into the office to stare at the board for the day. His primary job was to help Cait with the repairs. Not what he really wanted to do, but maybe she'd tell her side of the story with CC.

By lunch time, there was a definite cooling of relations between Hawke and Cait. They hadn't said more than a few words to each other and those centered on the repairs they were doing. Dom sent Cait out to get some lunch so he and Hawke could have a talk.

"So?" Dom asked after Cait had been gone long enough not to suddenly reappear.

"So? What?" Hawke returned from his position under the nearby Jet Ranger.

"So are you going to tell me what's going on between you and Cait or am I going to have to ask her?" Dom knitted his eyebrows and put his hands on his hips.

"_Nothing_ is going on between us. Like I keep telling you and everyone else who asks we're just friends."

"Maybe that's your problem," Dom said so low that all Hawke heard was "problem." Louder he said, "Then how come you two are barely speaking to one another?"

Hawke rolled out from under the helicopter and looked up at Dom.

"We've been talking all morning. How do you think we're getting this hunk of junk fixed?"

Usually an insult to one of Dom's helicopters would successfully divert him from any other subject, usually.

Dom began to shake his finger at Hawke. "Don't try because it's not going to work. String you know what I mean," Dom began raising his voice. "You two haven't said word one to each other that didn't involve that chopper."

"It doesn't matter Dom. You can't help. It's Cait's problem anyway." He started to roll back under the helicopter.

Dom stopped him.

"Look String, I've been around the block a time or two and know something about women. You've done something to make her mad and I want to know what it is."

String got to his feet and began wiping his hands on a rag.

"It has nothing to do with me. Cait and CC know each other from college. They used to be friends; apparently they had a falling out over some guy. Now they don't like each other. It's as simple as that."

"Boy, if you think this has nothing to do with you than you're denser than those mountains you're so fond of. Talk to Cait about it and be nice when you do it too. I don't know CC all that well, but she seems like a nice enough girl. But, I _know_ Cait and if she doesn't like her there has to be a good reason. You should listen to her. She's a pretty smart girl."

About this time Caitlin returned, she hadn't intended on eavesdropping, but Hawke's angry rejoinder stopped her in her tracks.

"Why can't everyone just leave me alone? I'm not twelve anymore, Dom. I don't need a meddling mother hen hovering over me when he should be minding his own business. And, I certainly don't need an ex-cop from Texas telling me who I can and can't see. I'm fine on my own."

Caitlin couldn't believe Hawke was treating Dom that way. She plastered on a cheerful smile, took a couple of steps back, and came barreling into the hangar.

"I hope you like cold cut combo, Dom. They were all out of Italian meatball." She laid her burden on the crate between them seemingly oblivious to their tension and mood. She fished out Hawke's sandwich and launched it at him. "Tuna salad for you, and bologna surprise for me," she said then passed out the drinks.

Everyone welcomed the diversion the meal provided. Dom retreated to his office to eat leaving Cait and Hawke the hangar. The two ate in an uncomfortable silence.

Hawke was obviously brooding and Cait wasn't about to try and cheer him up.

She was too mad at him. Practically from the time she'd arrived in California, he'd been alternating between a teasing big brother type, to someone who maybe just maybe had deeper feelings, to someone who didn't give a damn about anyone or anything. It was the latter stage he seemed to be in at this moment.

She hated it when he was like this not because of how he treated her all though that was bad enough, but because he would shut Dom out. It hurt Dom to have what was practically his son yell at him and then completely ignore him. Dom was caring and giving and didn't deserve to be cast aside at any moment. And it was all just because Hawke was too stubborn to let anyone else care about him.

_Well fine,_ she thought. _Two can play that game. You're gonna find out just how your actions affect others. And, buddy you haven't met stubborn until you've met Caitlin O'Shannessy stubborn._


	3. Chapter 3: The Best Laid Plans

Chapter 3: The best laid plans

Carrie Carter drove up the winding drive of the estate in Hollywood Hills that she rented for the month. She doubted she'd need it for that long, but it was always better to have contingencies in place. She firmly believed it was simple lack of planning that caused her to be bested only once before.

As she pulled to a stop in front of the massive oak doors she had no idea that a man with hair the color of walnut peered at her from behind a window. He was tall and muscular with a slight skew to his face so that one chocolate brown eye was a little higher than the other. He ducked into the shadows of a nearby archway aiming his gun steadily at the front door.

CC pulled to a stop and grabbed the thin white sack that was in the seat next to her. Another part of her contingency plan had just fallen into place. L A doctors were so easy to manipulate when you waved cash in front of them. The prescriptions in the sack would be deadly in the right dosages not to mention that once ingested they would cause a lot of pain and periodic unconsciousness. They were also tasteless when crushed and mixed into anything moderately liquid. She smiled happily as she entered the house.

"Well, from the look on your face, you've either got Hawke wrapped up or you're up to no good."

CC whirled to her left to see the man gazing at her from the archway to the hall.

"I see you finally caught up with me Chad. Do you think you can do what's necessary this time?"

"If I hadn't of been caught off guard, I would have had Cait back in college. She was the only one that got away." He raised his gun in a salute. "She won't get away this time."

"Look brother of mine," CC dropped her keys on a side table and shook the little white bag, "there will be no surprises this time. These drugs will make her compliant to your needs. Once I've got her captive you can have her for the rest of the month. No trouble at all."

"This had better work. The last time your little friend got me locked up seven years for rape. You failed to tell me she was going for extra credit with that sting."

"If you had just stuck to the plan, and stole her away from Carl like you were supposed to she would have been so love sick you could have had her anytime. And, Carl would have been mine."

"How was I supposed to know he'd walk in while I was undressing her? You were supposed to keep him busy until I was in the middle and she started to wake up."

"But did you have to kill him?"

"I tell you what. I'll let you play with Hawke a little before I kill him."

"Is the wine cellar ready for our guest?"

"I'll get her here and she'll be able to see everything."

"You really are the best brother ever." She smiled and hugged him.

"Yeah, I bet you say that to all your brothers."

"Of course I do since you're my only brother."

The two of them laughed at the old joke and began to make their final preparations for their guest.

~~AW~~

"Santini Air," Dom answered the phone. "Yeah she's here. Hang on a minute." He shouldered the phone and looked over to where Hawke and Cait were just finishing up on the Jet Ranger. Things hadn't improved after lunch and the two weren't speaking at all to each other now. He knew Hawke was brooding, but couldn't figure out what was going on with Cait. She'd always tried to cheer String up when he got like this before. Now it looked like she was simply trying to endure the rest of the day.

"Cait," he yelled some guy wants to talk to you.

"Well what's his name?" she called while wiping down the tools she was stuck with putting away.

"What do I look like an answering service? Come and ask him yourself if you want to know." He put the receiver down and crossed over to take the sizable wrench she was carrying to the phone out of her hand.

"Hey I might need that." She said as he headed for the tool box.

"That's what I'm afraid of," he said with a glance at Hawke who seemed blissfully unaware of the situation.

"This is Cait," she said as she snatched up the phone.

"Ms. O'Shannessy, I'm calling on behalf of your landlord. It seems we have a busted water pipe at the house you rented. We need you to come down right away so we can fix it and discuss damages."

"Oh, well okay, I'll be right there." She hung up the phone and explained the situation to Dom. He let her off for the rest of the day.

"She's on her way." Chad Carter told his sister as he set the phone back in its cradle.

"Did she recognize you voice?"

"Not at all. I'll have her back here in an hour." He walked out the front door and climbed in a white van with Carl's Plumbing stenciled on the side.

~~AW~~

Cait noticed the plumbing van as soon as she turned onto her street. It was parked on the street in front of her house with the back doors partially open. The driver was nowhere to be seen.

She fished out her keys and made her way to the door. She stopped on the porch noticing her door was ajar. Her training with the Airwolf crew made her cautious. She pushed the door slowly open.

"Hello? Mr. Spade?" she called out for her landlord. When she got no answer, she took a hesitant step inside scanning the living room. Nothing seemed to be out of place. Now that she was inside she could hear running water coming from the bathroom.

"Hello?" she called again as she cautiously made her way down the short hall to the bathroom. She glanced through the open door to her bedroom as she went. Again nothing seemed to be wrong or out of place. She was starting to get an uneasy feeling about no one answering her.

_The plumber probably can't hear over the running water_, she reasoned.

She opened the door to the bathroom slowly.

"Hello? Is anyone here?" she asked just as she registered that the faucets on both the tub and sink were running full blast.

From behind her an arm wrapped itself around her and a white cloth was held to her mouth by a hand. She struggled briefly before she succumbed to the sickly sweet smell of what she could only guess was chloroform.

Chad gave a wicked chuckle as he felt Caitlin's body go limp. He held the cloth to her nose for an extra minute to be sure she was good and out. She was easy to carry out to the waiting van. He handcuffed her hands behind her before locking her in the back. He made sure no one had seen a thing. He turned off the water and carefully locked up the house. He wanted to make it a little difficult for anyone who might come looking for her. All someone would find is a locked house with no one's prints in it but hers.

"Only a matter of time now, Caitlin," Chad said to her unconscious form as he pulled away from the curb. "You're about to have the ride of your life."

~~AW~~

Caitlin climbed her way through the fog in her mind to blink her eyes. She was sleepy and couldn't figure out why she was taking a nap in the middle of the day. She went to move her hands to wipe her eyes and felt the resistance of metal around her wrists.

"What the…," she stopped as she realized she was being restrained. _Damn_, she thought. _I've been kidnapped, AGAIN._

She looked around her prison. She was laying on a mattress in what seemed to be a wine cellar. Dust covered bottles were stacked in diamond shaped crevices of wood along the wall to her left. She struggled to sit up and found her hands were cuffed around a water pipe in the wall. To Caitlin's right just out of reach was a TV on a small table. Beyond that a short flight of stone steps led to a door. It was the only way that she could see in or out.

"Well at least I'll be able to see 'um coming this time," she said to herself. Hearing her voice made the situation seem a little less scary. She'd been in tight spots before and found that talking to herself helped focus her attention.

"Now, Caity girl step one: get these cuffs off."

Caitlin examined the cuffs. She tried to slip one hand out and then the other, but whoever had put them on her had made certain they were tight enough.

"Where's a hairpin when you need one."

She frowned and peered closely at the pipe. It went straight down into the floor but had a 45^ bend at the top where it disappeared into the wall. She grasped it with both hands and pulled. It didn't budge. She braced her legs against the wall and pulled again. Nothing happened.

_Darn that always works on TV._

She didn't think she should yell for help since she didn't know who or where her captors were, but maybe she could try another tactic to see if she could be heard outside the cellar.

"Hey," she yelled. "I'm a little thirsty in here."

No sound but her own breathing greeted her ears.

She yelled louder. "Hey can I get something to drink?"

No one answered her plea.

"The least they could have done was left the TV on," she said as she tried to think of something that would help her escape.

~~AW~~

After what must have been hours, she was startled to hear the door knob turning. She hastily abandoned her attempts at loosening the pipe where it elbowed into the wall and turned to the opening door.

She was startled further by the person who walked through it.

"I see you remember me," Chad Carter said as he walked through the door carrying a tray. "I thought you might be a little hungry. It's soup and crackers with a little juice."

Caitlin straightened her spine and looked defiantly at Chad.

"I thought you got sent up for ten to fifteen. What happened? You couldn't have been released for good behavior?"

"Ah there's the Cait I know all fire and stone until we start having a little _fun_."

He sat the tray just within her reach.

"I hope you enjoy the show later. We've gone through a lot of trouble to give you the time of your life."

"I'm sure it won't be half as entertaining as when I see you put back in jail especially since this is California. They have a lot more inmates out here with diversified tastes."

"I'm going to have such fun with you my little Cait. You're one shrew that will be tamed." He leered at her and was satisfied at the look of utter revulsion she gave him.

As he left Cait surveyed the contents of the tray. A bowl of creamy soup, one spoon, and a plastic cup of juice, didn't give her anything to work with for an escape plan. The smell however did remind her that lunch had been several hours in the past and she hadn't eaten all of her sandwich. She negotiated with the water pipe until most of one arm was through the opening and carefully lifted the spoon to the bowl to her mouth. The soup tasted and smelled like cream of chicken. _Just a little won't hurt_, she thought. _I need to keep my strength up to fight him off later._


	4. Chapter 4:  Often Go Awry

Chapter 4: Often go awry

Stringfellow Hawke yelped in pain. He dropped the wrench he'd been holding and shook his hand.

"Hey, just 'cause you're mad doesn't give you a right to take it out on my choppers," Dom yelled out at him.

The younger man just scowled in his direction snatched up the wrench and attacked the bolt he was trying to loosen once more. Five minutes later he threw the wrench down in disgust.

"What time did you say Cait was coming back?" he asked trying not to seem interested. "After all _she_ is the one that's supposed to be overhauling this thing."

"I gave her the rest of the day off. She's supposed to call and tell me what the damages are."

String glanced at his watch. It had been well over two hours since Caitlin had left. He had been getting an uneasy feeling that something was wrong.

"Maybe you should call her and tell her to get back here and finish her job."

"Since when can't you handle a little overhaul by yourself, String? Give her a break. Half her stuff is probably soaked." Dom responded.

"You could at least call her and find out if she's going to be on time in the morning. I don't want to get here and do all the work myself."

Something in String's tone made Dom look up at him.

String was trying to conceal his agitation. Dom had known him for too long and figured something beyond the earlier fight was bothering him.

"What's wrong?" Dom asked. "Do you think something's happened?

String looked over at his mentor and friend. He knew Dom could tell he was concerned. But, he'd never been able to explain his hunches. He just knew that something wasn't right.

"I know that look. Okay, I'll call her." Dom reached for the phone and dialed Cait's house. The phone rang and rang. "There's no answer String." Dom said after the eighth ring.

String didn't say a word but headed for the locker room to change out of his coveralls.

~~AW~~

Hawke and Dom climbed out of the red, white, and blue Santini Jeep. Hawke was pounding on the front door before Dom was halfway across the lawn.

"Caitlin!" He glanced around for anything out of the ordinary. "Caitlin, come on open up!"

"Her car's still here." Dom pointed out the obvious.

"Yeah."

Hawke fished out the key Caitlin had given him once to water her plants while she was away and unlocked the door. He and Dom cautiously entered the house. They found her purse and keys. Nothing seemed to be out of place and more importantly there seemed to be no water damage from a broken pipe or anything else.

"At least we know she made it this far," Dom pointed out. His reward was a scowl from Hawke. "Maybe we should call the police," he continued.

"I'll do one better. I'm calling Michael."

Within minutes a swarm of white clad people had descended on Caitlin's house. Hawke, Dom, and Michael were standing on the lawn.

"We haven't had anything on an attempt on Airwolf for months," Michael argued with Hawke. A brunette handed him a plastic bag containing a white cloth.

"We're done here Sir. This is all we found."

"Thank you Caroline." He opened it and sniffed as she walked away. "Chloroform. This abduction could have only been personal, Hawke. Has she had any conflicts with anyone lately? An irate student, client, boyfriend maybe?"

"No, Michael." Hawke answered. "Like I keep telling you everything around the hangar has been fine. Your people must have missed something."

"Well there is CC." Dom interrupted Michael before he could respond.

"CC?" Michael asked.

"No" Hawked said at the same time shooting Dom a look.

Undeterred Dom plunged ahead. "Carrie Carter came in for flying lessons while Cait was out on a charter. When she came back, we found out that she and Cait knew each other in college."

"A coincidence, but so far that doesn't sound like a reason for kidnapping." Michael said pointedly.

"I thought you didn't believe in coincidences. Besides, they apparently don't like each other over some guy from college. And, String took CC up to the cabin last night..."

Hawke walked a few steps away and stared at the front door of Cait's house while Dom told his story. _There was something off about CC's story with Cait, but was some guy enough to hold a grudge all these years?_ String didn't think so, but a sudden image of Gabriel lying in the desert changed his mind.

"…and today Cait and String have hardly spoken to each other."

"Hmm. It can't hurt to check it out." Michael stroked his mustache and retreated to his limo.

"Come on Dom. Let's lock up and see if the neighbors saw anything."

After getting nowhere with the neighbors, they returned to the hangar. The phone was ringing when they arrived and Hawke rushed to answer it.

"Santini Air," he said irritated.

"You must have clients eating out of your hand answering the phone like that."

"Cut the crap Michael. What did you find out?"

"Hawke just how well do you know this Carrie Carter?"

"Not intimately. Why?"

"She's not entirely sane. But that's the least of your worries."

"What do you mean?"

"Did Caitlin tell you what happened in college?"

"Michael, if you don't stop talking like a spy and start giving me some answers, I'll see to it personally that you have more than one blacked out eye."

"Okay, okay, calm down. CC Carter fixated on Cait's boyfriend in college, a Carl Houghton. He was a cattle baron's heir. He disappeared during his junior year. They suspect that either CC or her brother Chad had something to do with the disappearance. Cait testified against Chad in a rape and attempted rape case. He got ten to fifteen and vowed revenge on Cait. CC couldn't handle it and was whisked away to 'private' care. Since she's been released several of her male acquaintances have disappeared. Chad made parole last month. Carl's remains were uncovered two weeks ago in a dried up stock pond on a ranch belonging to the Carter family. He was identified through partial dental records. He suffered a very brutal death. Hawke if you have any idea where either one of them might be tell me so we can apprehend them."

Hawke let out the breath he'd been holding. His eyes had gone to ice. "I'll get back to you, Michael." He hung up the phone before the spy could respond.

"Well what did he say?" Dom almost yelled in the silence that followed.

String looked up from the phone. "Cait's in trouble."

"I gathered that. What are we going to do about it?" Dom said bristling.

"You're going to get the Lady. I'm late for a date."

~~AW~~

Carrie Carter looked stunning in the black evening gown she wore. Her hair was swept away from her face and fell in large curls down her back. She walked carefully down the steps trying to keep the silver stiletto hills out of the small cracks in the stonework.

"Caitlin, you're awake. Good, I don't want you to miss a minute of the show."

She crossed over to the TV and flipped it on. A view of the open space living area displayed on the screen.

"I'm going to make sure you pay this time CC," Cait said.

"Oh Caitlin," CC laughed. "You always did have delusions of grandeur. You're not going to be able to do anything but watch."

"Watch?" Caitlin asked.

"Yes, you're going to have a closed circuit view of Hawke and me. He should be arriving in the next fifteen minutes for our date. You're going to see the man you love with the woman you hate the most. I'm taking him away from you just like you did with Carl. My only regret is that I won't be able to see your face when we make love."

"You're crazy. Hawke and I are just friends. Besides I didn't take Carl away from you, you two never even dated."

"You knew I loved him. He would have loved me too if you hadn't of pranced in and taken him away. Now, I'm doing the same thing to you. After all, I did sleep in his bed last night."

She watched for Caitlin's reaction.

Caitlin started to grin. She'd seen Hawke this morning. He'd been grouchy and irritated. If CC had slept in Hawke's bed then Hawke had slept on the sofa.

"Why are you smiling? Didn't you hear? I slept in Hawke's bed."

"Oh, I heard you CC. But, I know Hawke; he's starting to see through your charade. I would be surprised if he hasn't had you checked out by now."

"You're bluffing. Hawke and I will be together tonight and you'll have a front row seat." CC turned on her heal and left the cellar.

A minute later Cait's attention was drawn to the TV as CC and Chad were talking in the living room. She couldn't hear what they said, but the man started to go back the way CC had come from. CC opened the door and she could see that Hawke had arrived for their date.


	5. Chapter 5:  The Date From Hell

Chapter 5: The Date from Hell

"Did you have trouble finding the place? You're a little late." CC said as she let Hawke in the front door.

Hawke quickly took in the layout of the house noting the hallway off to the side. If Cait were here then she must be somewhere past that hall.

"I hope you can forgive me," he said casually. "Cait took off in the middle of the day and I had to overhaul a chopper by myself."

CC smiled ever so slightly. If he hadn't of been looking for it Hawke would have missed her reaction.

"Well I do hope she hasn't gotten herself into any trouble. Being late is one thing, but I would rather not have you running off to rescue her. I don't want a repeat of college."

CC led him over to the sofa and sat down. Hawke sat next to her.

"Oh, I don't think I'll be running anywhere," he said as he scooted closer to her. "I can guarantee you this won't be anything like college."

CC took the opportunity to kiss him. Hawke didn't resist but stopped her when one hand started to go down his back.

"I thought we were having dinner?" he asked. His lips mere inches from hers.

"We can always have dinner after," CC purred. She started to fiddle with the buttons at the top of his shirt.

Hawke cleared his throat. "Why don't you pour us some wine?" he said indicating the glasses and bottle arranged on the coffee table. "I just need to visit the facilities."

He stood and looked around.

"Oh, of course," CC reached for the bottle. "Just down the hall first door past the bend."

Hawke made his way down the hall. The first door he came to turned out to be a closet, the next, a study. He followed the bend and skipped the door he knew to be the bathroom. Quickly he tried the next door, a bedroom. The third door turned out to be some kind of pantry that led to the kitchen. He peeked in but pulled back when he saw a man at the kitchen counter. He cautiously looked in again his hand sliding to the gun tucked in at the small of his back. He heard a door open.

"How's it going?" the man asked.

CC walked in to his view to pick up a tray of vegetables that was on the counter.

"I'll have him eating out of the palm of my hand in no time," she said.

"Good. When will those drugs start to affect Cait?"

"Patience never was one of your virtues, Chad." CC smiled sweetly. "She should be experiencing pain on several levels shortly. But, the pain of seeing me with Hawke and then what you have in store for her will be nothing compared to those drugs. Give her another five minutes. She should start to hallucinate by then. You could even convince her that you're Hawke. I'm sure she'd be more than willing."

"Where's the fun in that?" Chad sneered as CC left the room.

Hawke still had no idea where Caitlin was. She had to be close, but time was running out. Making a quick decision to divide and conquer, Hawke decided to rejoin CC in the living room.

"Ah, there you are Hawke," CC said as he reentered the living room. "I was beginning to wonder where you'd gotten off to."

She handed him a glass of wine and picked up a baby carrot. She brushed the carrot across her lips suggestively before sucking the end into her mouth. Two quick bites and it disappeared down her throat.

"Now," she leaned into him on the sofa, "where were we?"

Hawke took the motion and 'accidently' spilled his wine onto CC. A surprised CC jumped up from the sofa.

"Oh," Hawke said standing as well. "Maybe you should change into something more comfortable."

He brushed her hair from her shoulder. "And less damp."

CC took the jester as an invite and turned her back to Hawke. "If you'll just help me out of this," she said as she lifted her hair from the back of her dress revealing the zipper.

"My pleasure," Hawke said with a smile as he unzipped the dress all the way down to the small of her back.

She walked slowly away from him her hips swaying. She let the dress fall from her shoulders as she got to the hall. "Hawke," she said over her shoulder glancing back at him. "Bring the wine."

He smiled in response and picked up the bottle. He made enough noise for her to know he was following her.

She left the bedroom door open. When he got to it he could see her through a partially open door to a closet where she was slowly wiggling her way out of dress and stockings. He crossed quickly to the door and pushed it closed. He dragged a nearby chair up to it and jammed it under the knob. He hopped that would hold her long enough for him to locate Caitlin. Fortunately closing the bedroom door drowned out most of CC's angry pounding to be let out of the closet.

Hawke made his way back down the hall to the pantry. He slipped inside and peered into the kitchen. Chad seemed to be gone. He entered the kitchen gun first and swept the room. One door obviously led out to the hall. One door seemed to lead out to the veranda. The third door which was closest to the pantry held promise. He tried the knob and found it unlocked. Hawke braced himself and slammed the door open. Down a short flight of steps was the wine cellar. On a small mattress in the room Chad was already on top of a struggling Cait.

With her hands drawn up above her head, all Caitlin could do to keep Chad at bay was to kick, and buck, and writhe. She landed a knee in his groin and was hit in the jaw for her effort.

"I like it when they fight," Chad said. "It makes it that much more fun."

He ripped Caitlin's shirt and pinned her beneath him. He turned her head to the monitor forcing her to watch as Hawke unzipped CC's dress.

"It looks like we're all going to have some fun tonight."

Chad started slobbering down Cait's neck. Caitlin twisted her whole body and Chad took the opportunity to finish removing the torn pieces of her shirt. He moved down to her pants and one leg found its mark in his stomach. He sucked in a deep breath before hitting her head a couple of times. He tore open her jeans and pulled them down to her knees. The impediment making it that more difficult for Cait to use her legs to defend herself.

As Hawke through open the door, Chad looked up from his recreation. The momentary distraction was enough for Cait to twist beneath him throwing him slightly off balance. He fell to her side blocking the shot that Hawke would have taken. Fearful of hitting Caitlin, Hawke crossed the room and bodily hauled Chad away. With a consuming rage, he began pounding on Chad. He hit the man repeatedly. Even when blood flowed freely from Chad's nose, Hawke continued to hit him. It was only when he heard Cait call his name that he realized that Chad was unconscious and bleeding.

"Hawke?" Caitlin called. "Hawke?"

Hawke left Chad and was by Cait's side in an instant. He lifted her to him and cradled her as best he could.

"It's okay Baby. I'm here. It's over now." He spoke to her gently.

She shuddered in his arms once and fell into unconsciousness.

"No," he cried in anguish. "You have to hang on Cait. I can't lose you."

He kissed her forehead and held her close. He realized after a moment that she was alive but unconscious.

Something on the monitor caught his attention. It was CC fully clothed and making a hasty retreat from the house. Knowing he couldn't go after CC without leaving Cait, Hawke gently released Cait to the mattress and ran for the door.

By the time he got to the front door CC's car had already peeled out of the drive. Hawke ran to the jeep and radioed Dom. Airwolf landed on the pavement within minutes. Dom swore under his breath when he saw Caitlin. They shot the links on the cuffs to free her from her prison and Hawke carried her to Airwolf. Dom radioed Archangel with the coordinates of the house while Hawke flew them to the hospital.


	6. Chapter 6:  Turning Point

Hawke stared at the double doors at the end of the hall. He leaned forward resting his elbows on his legs with his hands clasped before him. He didn't know exactly when he sat on the thinly cushioned chair. He didn't notice the people milling about doing their jobs. He hadn't noticed when Dom left to put Airwolf back in her lair. He didn't know anything outside the fact that they'd taken Caitlin behind those doors and someone would eventually come through them to tell him if she would make it.

He sat unblinking. One word kept repeating itself over and over in his thoughts. _Why?_

Not, why was everyone he cared for doomed? Not, why was he destined to be alone? Not even why hadn't she left and gone back to Texas before now. No, the why that kept repeating itself was _why her._

Out of all the women he'd been with or gotten close to why was it Caitlin who was hanging between life and death? Hadn't he done everything he could to insure they were only friends? Hadn't he encouraged her to see other people? Most of all was why hadn't he pushed her away hard enough? Why did he need her in his life so much that when she went through something that most people would leave over he would pull her into his circle more. She could have left after Holly, threatened to leave after Robert. He'd given her training in Airwolf. _To keep her safe_, he'd told himself, but really it was so she'd have an incentive to stay. He thought for sure she'd leave after Sawyer, but she stayed. _Why? Why her?_

He felt a hand on his shoulder and knew without looking that Dom had returned. No one else could put that much understanding and support into a simple grip on the shoulder.

Dom was saying something to him. He could hear the words but they weren't making any sense. Dom was saying something about blood. He hadn't been hurt so why would there be blood on him. Reluctantly he looked down at his hands. They were covered in dried blood. _How did it get there?_ He knew Caitlin hadn't been bleeding, though she had been hit. Slowly images of someone being hit repeatedly flashed through his head. He realized after a moment that he was the one doing the hitting. Even as the blood began to flow freely from the man and he had lost consciousness he saw himself repeatedly hitting. It was almost as if he were watching someone else inflict that kind of hatred and rage. He shuttered and the glazed look fell from his eyes. He blinked and looked over at Dom.

"That's better," Dom said. "I brought you some clothes. The restroom's down that way." He handed over a bundle and got String off in the right direction.

Dom watched as String shuffled down the hall. He'd never seen String like this before. And, he was worried.

After seeing Caitlin in that wine cellar, even though String had covered her with his jacket, he'd wanted to hurt the man responsible. One look at the unmoving heap in the corner told him String had gotten there first. He only hoped that the shock he could see in String's eyes would wear off soon. He prayed that Cait would be okay. He also prayed that this wouldn't be the last straw between the two of them. He hoped that somehow everything would work out for them. Dom loved Caitlin like a daughter and wished only the best for both his kids which in his mind were each other.

The double doors at the end of the hall opened revealing a man dressed entirely in white. A similarly dressed woman hurriedly whispered something in his ear before turning and heading back the way they'd came. Dom leapt to his feet and rushed over.

"Well, is there any word on Cait?"

"I think I'll wait and tell both you and Hawke at the same time." Michael said spying Hawke walking toward them.

Dom grabbed the collar of Michael's suit and shook him. "You'll tell me now or so help me I'll…"

"You'll tell us both," came the gravelly voice of Hawke from slightly behind Dom.

Hawke laid his hand on Dom's shoulder. Dom released Archangel and stepped back to look at String. Hawke had changed clothes and washed up. But, Dom could still see the hard edge in his eyes.

Michael shrugged his jacket back into place before speaking.

"Caitlin's out of surgery. They had to pump her stomach. We found empty pill bottles in that house. Marella recognized what the combination would do and had them test Cait. It's a good thing you didn't drink the wine, Hawke or you'd be in there too."

"Is she going to be okay?" Dom asked.

Michael sighed. "We don't know for sure. They're giving her something to counteract what was in her system. We don't know how effective it will be. If she wakes up in the next twenty-four hours, it will be a good sign. Thank God you got her here as soon as you did."

"Can I see her?" Hawke cut him off.

"Well yes, but Hawke, she's unconscious." He was talking to empty space as Hawke was already heading for the doors.

Michael stopped Dom as he made to follow String.

"Dom, keep an eye on him," he said with a stern expression.

Dom stopped at the hand on his arm. He looked at it pointedly and then at Michael.

"I always look after him. And, I do a better job of it than you ever have."

Michael let his hand drop.

"I count on that," he said. "But, he put Chad Carter into a coma. They're going to have to do reconstructive surgery just so he'll be able to breathe through his nose again. I've never seen Hawke that out of control before. In that condition, he's dangerous and not only to himself."

Dom glanced the way Hawke had gone then looked back at the spy.

"I'll keep it in mind," he said then headed down the hall himself.

~~AW~~

Caitlin's face was already swelling and discolored from the blows she'd received in the attack. She had an oxygen tube in her nostrils and was hooked up to an array of monitors. ICU rules dictated only one visitor at a time, but Michael had impressed upon them the exception required for this patient. Since he was the Deputy Director of the FIRM, the nurses didn't argue. Besides Marella had a medical degree and had agreed with Michael that an exception where Hawke was concerned was best for their health.

Hawke walked around the bed and placed the only chair in the room next to it before sitting down and facing Cait.

He studied her face. She was far too still. Gone was her ever present energy. She looked as if she were dead rather than merely unconscious. He was glad for the noises of the IV machine, grateful for the wavy lines on the heart monitor. They were tangible reminders that she was still alive, reminders that she still had a chance. He hesitantly put his hand on hers. It was cold, and he had to glance at the heart monitor again to reassure himself the wavy lines still tracked a heartbeat.

Dom came up behind him and put a hand on his shoulder.

Hawke looked up at Dom.

He spoke hesitantly. "What if…she doesn't...?"

"Ah you know Cait," Dom said with bluster and bravado. "She'll be up in no time. You just watch String. Why, I know she'll be complaining about having to clean out all the greasy rags around the hangar. You just wait."

"Who are you trying to convince Dom, me or you?"

Dom squeezed his shoulder.

"Look Archangel said if she wakes up within the next twenty-four it's a good sign."

"So..."

"So, we'll just sit here and make sure she has a good reason for waking up."

Hawke looked back at Cait.

"A good reason for waking up," he mumbled. He wanted her to wake up, needed her to. He held her hand and rubbed his thumb across her knuckles.

Dom prayed silently for a miracle.

~~AW~~

Hours later Archangel caught Dom's attention through the glass wall to Caitlin's room. Dom pushed away from the wall he was leaning against and stepped out into the ward. They walked past the double doors before Michael stopped and turned to Dom.

"I thought you might want an update. The FBI is taking over responsibility for Chad Carter. He's their only lead on CC. If he wakes up from the coma, he's going to have to answer a lot of questions. Apparently they corresponded regularly. After further investigation, a lot more bodies have shown up on properties belonging to the Carter family. It seems CC is something of a black widow, but Chad gave her suggestions on where to hide the bodies."

"I can see how CC could have fooled people. She seemed like a nice girl. But, I just can't see how anyone would give an animal like Chad parole." Dom said.

"That's an interesting story in itself. It seems in the last seven years that all of his alleged rape victims have mysteriously relocated and then vanished. In fact, one of my operatives discovered that Cait's transfer to the area including Pope County came by way of a private request of a senator who had one major campaign contributor, Calvin Carter the Carter patriarch. If you two hadn't of shown up when you did, Cait would have vanished along with the rest. Chad's lawyer did some creative legal maneuvering to get him a new trial. Since all the original complainants were hard to locate, they let him out while waiting for the new court date."

"I can't believe it."

"Believe it. The connection doesn't end there. When we began investigating we found out all sorts of things. We now know who hired Robert Villars to take out Carter Anderson the third, Calvin Carter. I never thought I'd say this, but being around Hawke is what's kept Caitlin alive this long."

"Yeah, trying convincing him of that."

Michael silently conceded the point with a tilt of his head.

~~AW~~

Hawke silently studied Caitlin's face. Despite the angry bruises and puffy eye and cheek, he allowed himself to see her beauty. He reached out and tenderly pushed a tendril of her red hair behind her ear resting his fingers on her soft skin for a moment. Tears began to blur his vision. He hastily wiped them away.

His thoughts circled again back to _why? Why her?_

"Cait you need to wake up," he said. "If for no other reason than to tell me you told me so."

He squeezed her hand a moment.

For the first time since he was a kid he thought about praying. He believed in God, but didn't think that God bothered himself much with the daily lives of people. After all if God cared so much, why did bad things happen to good people, people like Cait.

_Maybe so people like me would think about praying,_ he thought.

_Well it can't hurt._

He began to mumble out a plea for Caitlin to be all right. He didn't make vain promises feeling that making any kind of deal with God was pointless. He just emphasized all the great things about Caitlin allowing himself for the first time to verbalize the reasons he cared for her, needed her. He summed it up with the conviction that if anyone deserved to pull through and be happy, it was she.

As he concluded, he looked up at her face once more. He felt foolish for hoping she'd instantly open her eyes. Just as he was about to declare the whole exercise a waste of time, he felt the slightest twinge in her hand. Thinking he must have imagined it, he let his head drop in defeat.

Her hand twitched again. He held it more carefully staring intently. The next time it happened he not only felt it but saw it as well. He looked up at her face and saw her eyes moving beneath the closed lids.

Hawke stood up rapidly. He bent over her and kissed her forehead gently, before leaving her room in search of a doctor.


	7. Chapter 7:  Friends Don't Let Friends

Chapter 7: Friends don't let friends

Caitlin sat on the edge of the hospital bed and waited. She hoped Hawke would show up to take her home. She looked up as the door opened and Dom entered the room.

"Boy am I glad to see you," she said with a smile. "I thought they'd never let me leave this place. Why I had to have a week of tests then a whole week of observation is beyond me. I should have just checked myself out after a couple of days."

"Now you're starting to sound like String." Dom said a little out of breath.

Caitlin noticed that he was little disheveled. The weary look in his eyes detracted from the beaming smile on his lips. She looked passed Dom searching for Hawke. She hadn't seen him since she woke up in the FIRM hospital from the drugs she'd been given.

"Hawke didn't come with you?" She tried to hide her disappointment.

"Nah, he's hold up at the cabin."

"Oh. Are we going up there to have dinner or somethin'?"

"No, he's been hold up there since he left you in the hospital. I tried to call him a couple of times, but he wouldn't answer."

"He's been up there for two weeks? I saw the boards before I got hurt. How have you been handling business?"

Caitlin knew Dom had packed the schedule to try and make up for the loss of revenue due to the recent frequency of Airwolf missions.

"I owed a few guys some favors and subcontracted a little." He saw Caitlin bite her lower lip. She helped out a lot with Santini's books and knew as well as he did that he really couldn't afford to do that.

"Don't worry business has been picking up lately. I'm getting by okay." Dom picked up her small bag of belongings and started to escort her out of the room. "Now let's not hang around. I gotta get back."

"I've got half a mind to fly up there and tell him what for."

"Oh, you know how he is." Dom said as they made their way to the waiting red, white, and blue jeep. "He blames himself for what happened. He was afraid you weren't going to make it. I'm sure he probably just forgot when you were being released that's all."

"So am I just supposed to just let him wallow in self-blame? I can't do that Dom." Caitlin's voice rose in her anger causing people in the parking lot to stare. "What happened wasn't his fault. Besides, that doesn't excuse his shutting you out too."

Dom shut the door on her tirade and started the jeep.

"Ah, he'll come around eventually. You'll see. He just needs a little time to adjust, that's all."

"You've been juggling the business, Airwolf, and visitin' me in the hospital all by yourself. You're exhausted Dom. All because Hawke is too caught up with the fact that _somethin' might_ have happened that _didn't._ Honestly, sometimes I just want to bean him with a 2x4."

"Now don't you go do anything you might regret Cait. I saw what that man did to you. I've never seen String that shook up before. I didn't think the doctors cleared you for flying anyway."

"I was just banged around a bit. They only kept me so long because they wanted to be sure all the drugs were out of my system. They never said I couldn't fly. Besides all I regret, is not giving him a piece of my mind sooner. This isn't the first time he's shut himself off and left all the work for you, Dom. It's about time he quits running away. Sometime he has to face the consequences of how he treats the people closest to him. If he'd of listened to me in the first place…"

"Just give him a couple of more days. Now that your back it'll all be okay. You'll see."

Dom fervently hoped String would show up at the hangar and soon. He could tell Cait was really upset and knew that when she got a bee up her bonnet she could really let Hawke have it. He really wasn't too keen on the idea that his two favorite people in the world might not be on speaking terms, again.

Caitlin frowned. She didn't think a couple of days would make much difference. Hawke had a tendency to wrap himself in his own perceived problems to the exclusion of everything and everyone else. But, Dom _might_ be right. _Yeah and I might be Maureen O'Hare._

"Okay Dom, but if he doesn't show by Friday, he's gonna find out just how much of a pain in the backside he is."

~~AW~~

When Friday rolled around Hawke had still not shown at the hangar. She hoped she'd convinced Dom that she'd dropped the idea of giving Hawke the what for. She even left and drove home after they'd closed the hangar up for the day. After a change of clothes and a bite to eat though she was back at the hangar and firing up a helicopter.

All week she'd seethed in her anger. It wasn't that he'd ignored her; she'd never even seen him at the hospital, but that she could see what each day with Hawke a no show was doing to Dom. The older man was clearly worried. He was also determined to not let it affect anything. Cait could see how it was tearing him apart to be shut out of Hawke's life. What really bothered her though was the reason Hawke was doing it. Everything had turned out okay in the end, and besides it wasn't even Hawke's fault Carrie had decided to hurt her. He'd never even met Chad before. Marella had told her that Hawke had beat Chad into a coma. She vaguely remembered him holding her in the wine cellar before blacking out. So he had apparently rescued her, flown her to the hospital, and then took off when she began to recover leaving her and Dom in a lurch. She felt it was just like when they first met. When it came down to facing the consequences of a situation, actually living in the real world, Hawke left it to others.

When she stepped into the cabin, she knew she had a job before her. Hawke didn't even acknowledge her presence. Undeterred, she took off her jacket and hung it on the peg before crossing over to the fire he was banking for the night.

"We need to talk"

He ignored her and walked over to the bar. He'd poured a drink when he'd heard the helicopter. He drank it down in one smooth motion and set the glass back on the bar.

Hawke made his way up the stairs to the sleeping loft never even glancing her way. Tet scrabbled up the stairs beside him.

She stood in shock. He'd just dismissed her in what even for him was a most callous way. The longer she thought about it though the more determined she became. Finally, she followed him up the stairs not at all careful if he heard her coming.

He placed the poker back beside the fireplace as he heard her stomping up the steps. He turned around and sighed as she came to a stop a few feet away.

"Go home Cait."

"Not until I say what I came to say."

"Maybe I don't care what you have to say." He raised his voice.

She matched his volume.

"Well, maybe I need to say it anyway. You need to wake up and smell the coffee, Hawke. You can't just treat the people that care about you like they don't exist.

"Look I never asked you or anyone else to care. I'm fine by myself. If the world would just leave me alone then no one would get hurt, life would be perfect." He bit out the last word.

She didn't know how she was going to get through to him, but knew she had to try.

"Why you egotistical, self-centered," she paused. Her anger and frustration mounted, "son of a motherless goat!"

"What?"

"You heard me Stringfellow Hawke. You think the world would be just fine without you." Her Texas accent grew heavy and she stepped closer to him. "You _think_ that you're so important in the great scheme of things that if no one ever sees you again everyone will be fine. All because of some curse you _think_ you have. Well I'll tell you mister, at least one person would be devastated, Dom. He already lost one son and you _think_ life would be fine for him if you just drop off the face of the earth do you? Listen real good Hawke 'cause I'm only gonna' say this once, he _needs_ you. Flying Airwolf and having you work with him at the hangar keeps him going. He'd of dried up and blown away a long time ago if you hadn't of been around for him to hope in."

String turned away from her. He knew Dom lived for flying Airwolf, and loved his business like a baby. He also knew Dom thought of him as a son. He certainly thought of Dom like a father.

"He's been running himself ragged trying to keep the business going while you've been up here brooding. He's been worried sick that because I got knocked around a little you'd go off and do something stupid and hurt yourself."

He turned back to face her at that comment.

"And you," she poked a finger hard into his chest, "you haven't even had the common decency to answer when he calls. How you can be so thick headed and…and stupid is beyond me. I know one thing though you really shouldn't worry about some curse. 'Cause you're doing a fine job of hurting those of us who care all on your own."

Hawke grabbed the hand attached to the finger jabbing painfully into his chest. He looked at Cait in all her righteous indignation. He saw the angry flashes in her eyes and the flush to her cheeks. Through his own anger and self-recrimination, he thought how beautiful she was at that moment. The thought bludgeoned its way to the surface and overrode everything else.

Before he thought about it he pulled her to him and kissed her hard. She resisted him, started to pull away, but for only a moment before they were both lost.

Shortly they found themselves in his bed. Neither said anything but both were frantic at first as each was afraid the other would stop abruptly. It was hard and fast and not what either had really wanted for their first time together. The moment of release came for them both and left them trying to catch their breath.

Hawke recovered first. He was horrified at how he'd taken her. He started to pull away.

She stopped him with a soft kiss to his neck.

He looked down at her.

"Caitlin," he said his voice full of emotion and unshed tears. "I'm so sorry."

She looked in his eyes and knew what he was thinking. A small understanding smile greeted his gaze.

"Just go a little slower this time," she said as she kissed his neck again and began to run her fingers down his back. It may not have been how she wanted, but he couldn't deny his true feelings after what had just occurred.

Hawke was about to protest that he didn't think he could go again; but, she continued to kiss his neck and flicked her tongue at the base of his throat. He found himself responding to her feathery touch and determined to enjoy himself very thoroughly and as slowly as he could stand.

~~AW~~

He held her lightly next to him softly stroking her arm as she fell asleep. He resisted the urge to squeeze her to him. He didn't want to mar her look of contentment as she trustingly snuggled closer. She was so beautiful. And, she was his. Right here, right now, she was his. He knew there would be consequences in the morning to what they'd shared, but for now he just wanted to live in the moment. He savored every curve and dip of her bare body and tried to sear the feelings of where she fit next to him on his mind for later reference. No matter what happened from this moment forward he'd at least have the memory of this night to console him. No matter what happened, he'd never forget it, never forget her.

He didn't quite know when he fell for her. It snuck up on him how much he cared. It was almost as if he woke up one day and was suddenly in love. Oh, he had cared about her from the moment he first saw her, but it was more about what he was in a position to do to help her and common decency. She showed how good a friend she could be when she brought back Jimmy's remains. She was always there for him, always undemanding in her friendship even when he found her responding on a deeper level to what to him had been casual flirting. Caitlin stepped out of the way when he was seeing someone else. She even made it clear on more than one occasion that they were just friends when some woman might get the wrong idea. She was without fear to ream him out when he deserved it as well. And, she survived perilous situations time and again. He'd kept her at a 'friendly' distance to protect her. Somehow despite her dating, despite his doing the same, he'd fallen deeply and inexorably in love.

He let out a resigned sigh. Morning would come too soon. She would hate it when he began to push her away again. She might even end up hating _him_ and leave all together. But, he didn't want to face it if something happened to her. If she died, he knew it would take a lifetime for his heart to recover if ever it could. At least he had a few hours to just enjoy being with the woman he loved.

Hawke kissed her forehead before drifting off to sleep.

Caitlin awoke to a heavy arm across her waist and a solid presence behind her. Warm breath blew in rhythm against her neck. She smiled with deep satisfaction.

Hawke was still asleep. She had been half scared when she fell asleep last night that he'd have disappeared in the morning. She knew he'd probably want to retreat back to the relative safety of friends. She turned gingerly in his embrace careful not to wake him.

She studied his expression in the dim light drifting through the room. She'd seen him asleep before mostly when they were on a mission and it was her turn for watch. He was always pensive even in sleep. Sometimes he had such violent vivid dreams he would wake up screaming. But as she watched him, she knew something had changed. Gone was the wary sometimes weary warrior she'd come to know. For once his face was totally relaxed with a small smile on his lips. It made him look years younger and seem really happy.

His eyes were moving rapidly under the lids and she knew he was dreaming. His smile widened. She wondered what he could be dreaming about that made him so happy. She didn't want to disturb him, but…. She lost the internal debate with herself and gently brushed her lips against his.


	8. Chapter 8:  Aftermath

Chapter 8: Aftermath

Caitlin slipped from the bed, gathering her clothes as she made her way to the bathroom.

She was a little surprised and disappointed that Hawke didn't wake up when she kissed him.

She dressed in the bathroom. She took the opportunity to splash water on her face and used a hand towel to dry it off.

She took a long look at herself in the mirror. She traced the thin lines around her eyes. She hadn't realized how much she'd aged since coming to California. She'd recently turned thirty and thought about how screwed up her life really was.

She was in love with a man who was convinced he was a curse and too stubborn to let anyone prove him wrong. In fact that same man would probably start pushing her away again as soon as he woke up. _Damned if I'm going to let him,_ she thought. _But, how am I going to stop him?_

She recalled a conversation she'd had a few weeks earlier. Her conclusion had been that she was more stubborn than Hawke. Well if he was going to try to push her out of his life, maybe she should do the pushing. At least then she wouldn't be the victim and he'd get a healthy dose of his own medicine.

Her resolve firm she opened the bathroom door.

~~AW~~

Hawke awoke as he felt Caitlin kiss him. Awoke out of the greatest dream he'd had in a very long time. He and Cait were married with two kids. St. John was home. And, life was great. Somehow even his long dead parents were there with two extra siblings for him. The only one missing was Dom.

Hawke pretended to sleep through the light kiss. He wasn't quite ready to hurt Caitlin the way he knew he had to. He wasn't ready to see the look in her eyes when he pushed her away again.

He cracked an eye barely open and guiltily watched her as she gathered her clothes and headed for the bathroom. When he heard the door shut, he flopped over on his back to stare at the ceiling.

_What have I done,_ he admonished himself. How could he possibly face her knowing the hurt he'd have to inflict? He thought rapidly of what he'd do when she got out of the bathroom. As each scenario presented itself he discarded it. Nothing seemed to strike the right balance. He didn't want to hurt her any more than absolutely necessary. He only wanted things to go back to the way they were. He stopped short at the absurdity of that notion. He couldn't deny how he felt about her. Everything had changed. They could never go back to pretending they were just friends. She would never stand for him dismissing her. She'd probably leave as soon as he faced her. He was going to lose her. He tried to console himself with the fact that at least she'd be alive.

The opening of the bathroom door had him hastily shutting his eyes. His mind retreated to the easiest option for the moment, avoidance. He pretended to be asleep as he heard her cross the sleeping loft and head down the stairs. Shortly he heard her making noises in the kitchen. Deciding she must be keeping to the familiar 'rules of the cabin' by making breakfast, he was relieved that the moment of truth would be delayed for a little longer at least.

He took his time getting up. He decided to take a shower to delay the inevitable. He stayed under the water until his fingers were getting wrinkled and the water started to turn cold. Hawke dressed slowly. He piddled around until finally there was nothing left to do. He braced himself and began to descend the stairs.

~~AW~~

Caitlin heard when Hawke got out of the shower. She poured on the speed with which she was making breakfast.

She figured her first step should just be to pretend that nothing had changed. So, she made breakfast since she was the first up. She hastily set the table with one plate, a fork, and a glass of juice. She had nervously eaten while cooking, dreading what was coming. She hoped she wouldn't falter and crack.

She was just transferring the eggs to the table when Hawke began to make his way down the stairs. One look at his face confirmed every suspicion of his motives.

"Mornin' Hawke," she greeted. She turned away and headed back to the kitchen. "Have some breakfast."

Knowing she was avoiding him but not eager to do what he had to, Hawke took his place at the table. He seized on the one place setting.

"You're not eating?"

Caitlin hastily downed the rest of her juice while crossing to the table. She set the glass down and picked up a slice of toast. Jamming part of it in her mouth, she spoke while heading for the door and her jacket.

"Can't, I didn't expect to stay here last night. I have an appointment this morning that I can't miss. I'll see you around," she said as she left.

In her haste, she left the front door open.

Hawke got up and went to the door. He stood there half in and half out. He watched her walk rapidly to the waiting chopper. He watched during the quick but thorough flight check as the rotors began spinning. In fact, he was still watching as the helicopter vanished behind the nearby rise.

~~AW~~

Monday came too soon.

Caitlin, as usual was at the hangar early.

She'd had a long weekend.

After talking to one of her sorority sisters for most of Saturday night, she spent Sunday writing a long letter to Hawke. She never intended for him to see it. It was just her way of getting everything out in the open. It helped her examine her feelings, wants, and frustrations. She was now firm in her decision to turn the tables on Hawke.

She knew it might backfire. He could just be grand with everything going back to the way it was. Only, things were going to be different. She was going to be the one who rebuffed his efforts to not only discuss what had happened, but to be in any intimate situation. If he accepted the new terms of their relationship, then at least she would still have her best friend. If on the other hand he began to react like she had for the last six months or so, well then everything would change, hopefully for the better.

Since the Jet Ranger and Dom weren't at the hangar, it could only mean that he'd gone to get Hawke. She wouldn't have to wait long to see how things were going to go.

~~AW~~

Dom sat the helicopter down outside the hangar. He had been glad when String radioed him to pick him up. He'd known that String would eventually remember that Cait was out of the hospital and resume his normal life again. It was with some confusion that he'd spent the flight from the cabin to the hangar. Hawke had seemed more like a man going to his own funeral rather than resuming his normal life. Every attempt that he'd made to draw Hawke into conversation that morning had been met with increasing hostility. Finally, Hawke went completely silent when Dom mentioned Caitlin. He let out a sigh as Hawke began to open his door.

"Wait a minute String. You can't let what happened with Caitlin effect your relationship. She's pulled through okay. Don't go doing something you'll regret later. Promise me you won't push her away."

_You have no idea,_ String thought as he looked back at Dom. "Dom," he began.

"Promise me you'll at least give it a week for things to settle," Dom pleaded.

Hawke caved. "I promise I'll try."

"Mornin' Dom. Mornin' Hawke," Cait said cheerfully as the two of them walked in.

"Mornin' Cait," Dom returned as he elbowed String reminding him of his promise.

"Mornin' Cait," Hawke said.

"I thought I'd take that film over to Paramount this morning," she said all business. "When I get back I can help out with the Stearman."

"That sounds great Cait," Dom said. "You and String can work on that while I fly those account execs down the cost."

~~AW~~

Halfway through tearing the Stearman apart Hawke realized that he hadn't even thought about having 'the talk' with Cait. But now she was humming. It was distracting him from work. It always distracted him. She only hummed when she was happy about something. Usually he liked to silently take credit for making her happy, but this time was different.

"Cait, can we talk?" he asked pulling his hands out of the engine and resting his elbows there.

"Sure Hawke, about what?" She continued working.

"About the other night," he studied her face.

"What a…bout it?" she grunted as she tried to loosen a stubborn nut.

"Well it kind of changes things."

"If you say so Hawke," she continued to try to loosen the bolt.

Hawke couldn't quite figure out her reaction. It was unexpected. He'd thought that she would turn all gushy about what it meant for them. He reached out and grabbed her arm causing her to look at him his face a model of a barracks Sargent about to give a firm dressing down.

"Hawke look, as far as I'm concerned nothing happened," she said with a sincerity she didn't feel. "As long as it doesn't happen again it didn't really mean anything. We can put it down to being caught up in the moment or something." She patted his arm. "It's not like we're all of a sudden in love with each other or anything dumb like that. We haven't even been out on a proper date or anything. Now if you're done talking about a moot point can you help me get this nut? It's a little stubborn."

Hawke was too stunned to do anything but comply.

During the rest of the week anytime he tried to talk about what happened, she blew him off. By Friday he was thoroughly confused, by her behavior.

He knew he hadn't imagined her prior feelings, but her current behavior had him thinking. Was she disappointed in his performance or was it something else?

She had said that they hadn't even had a proper date. But she also said that it would be dumb to say they were suddenly in love with each other. He knew how he felt, but could he have been wrong about her?

~~AW~~

The next Monday started out like any other day at the hangar. They did their work and had lunch like normal.

Dom was satisfied that things were finally getting back to normal. String hadn't pushed Caitlin away and business was going well. He was flipping through the mail happy that at least two of the envelopes seemed to be payment for a couple of stunt job's they'd recently performed.

"Cait here's one for you." He extended it to her.

Caitlin wiped her hands on a rag before retrieving the letter. She ripped it open and began to read. All the color, drained from her face and her hands began shaking.

"What is it honey?" Dom asked all concerned.

Hawke looked up from the part he was working on at a nearby table. He was quickly at Caitlin's side pulling her into a comforting embrace.

She collapsed into his arms dropping the letter.

Dom picked it up and began to read it aloud.

Caitlin,

You may have won this battle. But, I'll win the war.

CC

Dom glanced at the back of the paper but there was nothing more. He looked at Hawke.

"Call Michael!"


	9. Chapter 9:  Changing Tide

"I don't know what you want from me Hawke," Michael Coldsmith-Briggs III said. "We've gone over that letter with a fine tooth comb. There's nothing there to give us a lead on CC."

"So what am I supposed to do? Just sit around and wait until she kills Cait?" Hawke said with vehemence.

The Deputy Director watched the increasingly agitated man pace around his office. "I have people working on it. You've just got to be patient."

"I can't, not when it's Cait." Hawke came to a stop in front of Michael's desk. Glaring at the man who was both friend and adversary, he struggled to relax his clenched fists.

Michael sat forward in his chair. He studied Hawke for a moment. Part of his job was to judge people. He prided himself on how good he'd become over the years. It was part of what kept him at the top of the very dangerous and shifting sand pile of the intelligence world. And, his judgment was telling him that Hawke was a man on the edge teetering. Which way he fell would likely cause a great many people sleepless nights and may even cost a few their life. Michael had only seen Hawke in something close to this state a few times. All of them had involved some threat to the feisty red headed third member of the Airwolf crew.

"Is she still refusing a protection detail?" One look at Hawke's face told him the answer. He tapped his desk a moment then retrieved a file from the top drawer of his desk. He tossed it across to Hawke. "It's everything we have on the Carters."

"Thanks," Hawke said picking up the file and heading for the door. He stopped as Michael spoke again.

"Hawke, some of what's in there may surprise you. This wasn't Caitlin's only close call with them. And be careful, the Carter's have friends in high places."

Hawke acknowledged the warning with a nod of his head and left.

Michael pressed the intercom button, "Marella. Start preparing for damage control."

"Yes, Sir," came the reply.

~~AW~~

Hawke sat in a borrowed brown sedan just down the street from Caitlin's house. He was far enough away not to be immediately spotted but close enough to get a good view of the house. He had taken up the same position every night in various borrowed cars since the letter had arrived almost a month ago.

He and Cait had had a huge fight over his efforts to keep her safe. She flatly refused his offer to have her stay at the cabin saying that she wouldn't live her life in fear and anyway CC knew where the cabin was. His suggestion that she stay at Dom's was also rebuffed. She had even gone so far as to say that just because they were friends it didn't give him the right to run her life. Having some of his own words thrown back in his face had made him angrier than he wanted to admit. But, the all night vigils gave him plenty of time to think.

The file Michael had given him, detailed the Carter's efforts to do away with Caitlin since her testimony against Chad had put him in jail. He had been there to save her on more than one occasion. She needed his protection whether she wanted it or not.

He knew she wouldn't admit it, but this thing with CC was causing her some distress. He noticed that she hadn't been eating much lately and was tired a lot. He was really worried about her.

_I'm not going to lose her just because she's pig-headed and stubborn,_ he thought.

Tap…tap…tap.

Hawke started at the sound coming from his window. He'd been so caught up in his thoughts that he hadn't noticed the uniformed police officer approaching the car. He rolled down the window.

"Step out of the car please," the officer said one hand on the revolver at his waist.

"Sure."

"Hands where I can see them please."

Hawke cautiously got out of the car.

"Do you have some identification?"

"Yeah." Hawke reached for his wallet. At the sudden change in stance from the officer, he showed the palm of one hand while reaching with two fingers for his wallet. He flipped it open to show is id.

The officer shined his flashlight on the plastic.

"Stringfellow?" the officer asked. "You expect me to believe that's a real name?"

"It's the only one I've got," Hawke said irritated.

"You've got a reason for being here tonight?"

"Yeah."

The officer waited for more of an explanation.

"I'm watching out for a friend of mine. She lives in that house over there." He indicated Caitlin's house.

"A friend, huh? She's the one who called in about suspicious cars parking on the street. Why don't we go see if she really knows you, Buddy?"

Hawke started to protest, but the appearance of another officer had him giving in. He didn't need trouble with the cops.

The three of them walked down the street to Caitlin's house.

~~AW~~

Hawke sat uncomfortably on the sofa in Catlin's living room. She had seemed amused when the officers had threatened to take Hawke in as a stalker. He even thought for a moment that she'd let them arrest him before she finally admitted to knowing him. After they'd left she told him to sit and stay, like he was some kind of trained dog before disappearing into the other room. He thought the allusion apt since he was most certainly in the dog house where Caitlin was concerned.

The longer she was gone, the more he squirmed wondering what she had in store for him.

After about thirty minutes, he called out, "Cait?"

She appeared dressed in a t-shirt that hung loosely off one shoulder and sweat shorts carrying a pillow and a large bowl of popcorn. She threw the pillow at Hawke's head which he only barely caught. She put the popcorn on the coffee table and turned on the TV before sitting on the sofa next to him. Retrieving the popcorn she propped her legs on the coffee table.

"Cait," he said somewhat distracted by her attire and his assessment that she was dressed for bed and didn't have a bra on. "I was only checking to make sure you were okay. After all, we still don't know where Carrie is."

"It's okay Hawke," she said absently. The opening sequence of Casablanca was playing on the TV screen.

"You're not mad?" he asked.

"Well, I was at first." She said. "But, I've had a while to think about it. I finally decided that if you were stubborn enough to sit out there every night for almost a month I might as well let you sleep on the couch. And, since I was planning movie night, now was as good a time as any. Besides I kind of got tired of you taking three hour naps while you were supposed to be doing paperwork in the office."

"Wait a minute. You've known I was out there all along and didn't say anything."

"Yeah, I think it's kind of sweet." She flashed him a smile. "Now shush the movie's coming on."

Once again Caitlin had surprised him. She'd called the cops on him to teach him a lesson, but at the same time, she was willing to let him now sleep on her couch. She had essentially proven her own capability while caving to his protectiveness. Not for the first time did the thought that she was an amazing woman hit him. He found himself watching her more than the movie even though it was one of his favorites. At some point he put his arm around her and by the end of the movie, she had her head on his shoulder.

When the movie ended, she started to pull away.

"Wait," he said softly. He found himself unwilling to let her go. Ever since the night at the cabin she'd avoided physical contact with him. There had been no casual hugs no friendly kisses no gentle hand on the arm to get his attention. She didn't even jab him in the ribs anymore when he frustrated her. He had missed it missed her even though they'd seen each other practically every day. He realized he'd missed their closeness.

He lifted his hand to her cheek and turned her head toward his before resting it on her bare shoulder. He rubbed the bone at the base of her neck with his thumb. His eyes glanced at her lips once, twice.

"Cait, I…" he began.

She placed a finger on his lips to silence him.

"Don't Hawke," she said with sheer will. Her resolve was rapidly disintegrating. It had been harder than she expected to put distance between them. She'd struggled with it every day catching herself mid-movement to stop from touching him in some way. When he had voluntarily put his arm around her earlier she almost jumped at the shock of excitement it sent all the way to her toes.

"I don't want to lose you as a friend. And, I refuse to be the distraction of the week." She took a deep breath. "If we go there, it has to mean forever and I honestly don't think you're ready for that."

She smiled sadly as she traced her fingers over his jaw in a move identical to when she'd kissed him last. This time instead of brushing her lips lightly against his she stood to her feet.

"Goodnight Hawke." She retreated to the safety of her bedroom to silently cry herself to sleep.

~~AW~~

Hawke woke at dawn to strange noises in the house. He got up quickly and retrieved his gun from under his jacket on the coffee table. He crept quietly down the hall stopping in front of the bathroom door. It sounded like someone was gagging inside. He slowly turned the handle and thrust it open gun ready. What he saw had him coming up short. Caitlin had her head thrust over the toilet and was dry heaving. Hawke sat his gun on the tile and knelt beside Cait putting an arm around her.

"Hey are you okay?"

"Do I look okay?" she said between heaves. Spying his gun she said, "What were you going to do, put me out of my misery?"

"Funny." He stood and retrieved a wash cloth from the cabinet. He ran cool water over it and wrung it out before kneeling beside her again. "Here, this will help."

"Thanks," she placed the cloth to her forehead a moment before using it to wipe her face.

They sat there until Cait quit shuddering with heaves. After a few minutes he realized Hawke was holding her to his bare chest and gently stroking her back in a comforting gesture. She swallowed hard. The taste of vomit in her mouth was better than a cold shower.

"I think I'll be okay now. No need to put me out of my misery," she said handing him back his gun.

He helped her up and she went immediately to the sink to brush her teeth.

Since he was up and unlikely to get back to sleep, he started a pot of coffee. As he waited for it to brew he decided to fix some breakfast just a little toast and oatmeal to help settle Cait's stomach. She came into the kitchen just as the coffee finished.

"Um, coffee, just what I need," she said retrieving two mugs from the cupboard.

"Don't you think you should stick with toast after that."

"No, Dad," she said jokingly. "After the first bout, I'm good for the rest of the day." She proceeded to pour two cups of coffee handing one to Hawke.

"Just how long have you been sick?" He asked concerned. He had noticed her not eating a lot and she had seemed a little tired lately. If she was getting up this early every morning to empty her stomach it would explain her tiredness.

"Oh, just the last few days or so, it's nothing really. I'm sure I just caught a bug or something."

"I'll take you to the doctor." He stated not asking but telling.

She regarded his stern expression over the rim of her coffee cup. She knew he really cared for her, but damn it, she wanted more than just a concerned friend.

"I went yesterday at lunch."

"What did he say?"

"_She_ said it was probably just a stomach bug, took some blood, and said to take it easy. No restrictions on drinking coffee." She flashed him an amused smile before taking another sip.

"What was the blood for?"

"To run some tests Dr. Hawke. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to get ready for work." She headed down the hall without a backwards glance.


	10. Chapter 10:  Getting there

Hawke watched Caitlin all day long. He had been thinking a lot about her being sick, her lack of appetite, and tiredness. He kept coming back to one conclusion and wasn't sure how he felt about it. Given her recent behavior of pushing him away, he wasn't sure what he could do about it either. But if his suspicions were true, he'd push to marry her. Maybe not the best way to do it, but he already loved her and couldn't help but love whoever else might come along.

The ringing phone startled him. He snatched it up. "Santini Air."

"Hawke, I have a lead on Carrie Carter."

"Where?"

"Chomping at the bit are we?" Michael was somewhat amused at Hawke's single-mindedness.

"Michael, you know what I'm capable of when it comes to my family. Now, I'm only going to ask you once more. Where?"

"The Carters own a very private very secluded villa in the Caribbean. Traffic in and out has steadily increased over the last month until yesterday when all shipments ceased until further notice."

"Sounds like they were preparing for a guest and the guest finally arrived."

"That was our conclusion too. Officially we have no reason to pay the villa a visit, but…"

"Unofficially, I let you know what I find."

"I'll send the exact coordinates once you're on your way."

"Thanks Michael. I won't forget this."

"Thank me when that woman is no longer a threat. Good luck."

Hawke replaced the receiver and glanced out to the tarmac where Dom and Cait were doing a last check on an old Jenny. He sauntered over to the biplane.

"Hey Dom, you think we might have some time to do that systems check on the Lady?"

"What systems check? Everything was working fine the last time we took her up."

"Well you know. We need to see if that electrical glitch has worked itself out." He gave Dom a meaningful look then glanced at Cait.

Slowly Dom caught on. "Oh, oh yeah, I remember that uh electrical glitch."

"Oh, no you don't," Cait piped up. "I haven't been in Airwolf since you guys left me in the hospital. It's my turn to go joyriding."

"Cait," Hawke said. "This isn't joyriding. We have to work out a technical problem. I need Dom to help me fix it."

"I can run the EDCC as well as he can. Come on Hawke you always try to leave me behind."

Hawke looked at Dom for support. Dom looked at String then at the look on Cait's face, daring him to take Hawke's side.

"Uh, I'll just go and start to lock up. You two can figure it out yourselves."

"Coward," Hawke shot at his retreat.

"I'll make it worth your while." Caitlin took a step toward him head cocked to one side a definite gleam in her eyes. "I'll take all the students we get for the next month."

Hawke rubbed his chin calculating.

"Okay all the students for the next two months."

Hawke couldn't help the grin that broke out on his face. She always looked so cute when she was trying to cajole him into getting her way. But, he couldn't let her go, not this time.

"The next three months, but that's my final offer."

"I tell you what Cait. You be ready to go to dinner tomorrow night at eight. If you're a good enough date, then I'll let you go next time."

"Yeah, like you'd actually show up for that deal."

He closed the space between them and put his hands on her shoulders. She was caught by the seriousness in his eyes.

"I'll be there."

Her pulse raced. Was he really asking her out on a date? No, there had to be some catch.

He started to grin again as he could see the questions in her eyes.

"Wear something nice. I don't get dressed in a suit for just anyone."

He turned and walked away before she found her voice for an appropriate retort.

~~AW~~

"I'm detecting a subtropical jet stream," Dom called out. "Change course by three niner niner. Watch out for the clear air turbulence."

"Changing course."

"Recalculating eta. Eta two hours. So, how did you convince Cait to stay home?"

"Easy. I made her an offer she couldn't refuse," he said with a bit of humor.

"Oh? And, might I ask what that was?"

Knowing what his answer would probably do to Dom, String decided to have a little fun.

"Well, first I had to top her offer. After all she did offer to take all the students for the next three months."

Dom let out a whistle. "Three months? Boy, she really wanted to come."

"Yeah, and then I had to make sure it was good enough that she wouldn't get too mad when she found out where we went."

"I can't see her being too happy about being left out of this. The only one she probably hates more than CC is Angelica Horn."

"I figured that."

"So what could you have possibly offered her that she'd forgive you for taking her chance at CC?"

"Oh," he paused for effect, "I just asked her out on a date."

Dom choked into the microphone.

"What's a matter Dom?" String said barely able to contain his chuckle. He took a quick look over his shoulder at the astounded man. Dom's reaction certainly didn't disappoint. "Are you having a heart attack? Should I have brought Cait after all? I can always go back."

"No," Dom finally squeaked out. Then with a steadily stronger voice he said, "No that won't be necessary. You really asked her out? On a date?"

String looked back at Dom wearing an ear to ear grin.

"Yeah, I really asked her out on a date."

A hundred different things went through Dom's mind at once. _What prompted the sudden change? Well it's about time. Who finally knocked some since into you? Hallelujah!_

Finally it all came down to, "Don't screw this up boy."

"I don't intend too, Dom. There's too much at stake," String answered thinking about Caitlin's condition.

~~AW~~

Hawke crept down the marbled hall of the Carter Villa. The scans from Airwolf showed that four people were present. The three grouped in the kitchen he figured to be servants or guards. The fourth alone in what had to be a bedroom he guessed to be his target. He opened the door and stepped in quickly closing it behind him.

Carrie Carter was sitting at mirrored vanity. She saw Hawke enter her room and took note of the gun he held now pointed at her. Her first instinct was to scream for security. Considering she only had one armed guard, a chauffeur, and a cook, she decided on another tactic.

"Hawke," she said not turning around. "I knew you just couldn't resist me." She dabbed perfume between her breasts before she stood. The short silky lingerie she wore clung to her body. She started seductively toward him.

"It was such a shame how we were interrupted before." She stopped barely a foot from him. "At least here there will be no distractions," she began to pull the spaghetti straps of her garment from her shoulders.

"I wouldn't," Hawke said raising his gun. "You better put something a little warmer on. It can get awfully cold in prison."

"Oh, Hawke why resist my assets. We could have great fun together," she said leaning closer.

He stepped away from her and grabbed a long silky robe from the bed. He threw it to her.

"Put that on," he commanded.

She let it fall to the floor.

"Why? There are already too many things keeping us apart. But, at least some of those won't be around for much longer."

As she stepped over the robe making her way to the bed, her foot caught and she stumbled into Hawke. He tried to catch her. As soon as his gun was not pointed directly at her she put all her weight and effort into knocking it from his hand. She screamed as they tumbled onto the bed and began to beat at him with her fists. She kept yelling for her security throughout her efforts.

Hawke recovered quickly. He pushed her one way while he rolled the other to retrieve his gun. The bedroom door opened as Hawke disappeared over the side of the bed.

"He's there," CC yelled enraged. "Shoot him."

The security guard started around the bed. Hawke had lost his gun in the blanket that came with him as he slid onto the floor.

He grabbed the blanket and threw it at the security guard. They threw a few punches at each other. CC tried to retrieve the guard's gun but was knocked down by the struggling men. She hit her head on the bedside table and fell unconscious to the floor. Hawke finally managed to knock out the guard with the lamp from that same table. He found his gun under the edge of the bed. He started to pick up CC determined to carry her all the way to Airwolf if necessary.

"I wouldn't do that," a heavily accented voice said from the doorway.

Hawke looked up to see another man with a gun standing in the doorway. The man motioned Hawke away from CC. "I may only be the chauffer, but I still know how to use this."

Hawke backed away to the middle of the room while the chauffer came around to check CC for a pulse. Apparently satisfied that she wasn't near death, he motioned Hawke toward the door.

"I think we have a nice place for you to rest until the mistress recovers. Maria," he said as they passed through the kitchen on their way outside. "The mistress and Carlos need your assistance."

They slowly walked outside. As they passed into the shadows, Hawke slowed, turned quickly, and knocked the gun from the man's hand. They started to struggle.

Shots were fired at them from the direction of the house. The guard had recovered and was now pursuing Hawke.

A jeep drove up headlights illuminating the yard where Hawke and the chauffer were fighting. A machine gun fired a warning shot from the jeep.

Hawke managed to roll away from the fire. The chauffer wasn't so lucky and lay where Hawke had last hit him.

Hawke quickly got to his feet and ran through the cane field to try and avoid the jeep. He'd just made it to the clearing where Dom waited with Airwolf when the jeep caught up with him.

Dom laid down some cannon fire stopping the jeep in its tracks. Hawke ran desperately for Airwolf.

He took off from the clearing swiftly. Firing a Maverick to obliterate the jeep. He headed for the villa.

"Dom run scans. Can you tell where CC is?"

"There's no one there String. I've got one vehicle on the road headed to town."

"That must be them. I'm going after her."

"Wait String we've got bigger problems. I'm detecting four MiG's coming our way."

"Why would MiG's be here?"

"Well we are awfully close to Castro's place. And, he likes to keep tabs on the neighborhood. Are we gonna' fight them?"

String debated for a moment. "No. We better get out of here. I don't think Michael would like it too much if we started a war with Cuba."

"Boy wouldn't you like to see his face if we did?" Dom chuckled.

"Yeah," String turned Airwolf home.


	11. Chapter 11:  Making it up

Five minutes after eight Hawke was still sitting on his motorcycle outside Caitlin's house. He'd been there ten minutes already. When he got there five minutes early, he didn't go in because he didn't want to seem too eager. Now he was nervous. He didn't want to mess this up. He knew how independent Cait was. If he didn't do this right, he had no doubt that she would leave and take his chance at a family with her.

A car went by on the street. He watched its fading headlights a moment before finally getting up and going to her door.

Caitlin had been ready for thirty minutes when Hawke finally pulled up in her drive. She hadn't been sure he'd show up. She knew he probably only asked her as a way to divert her from tagging along in Airwolf. She still didn't know where they went only that he and Dom had been gone since yesterday. She wasn't even sure they'd be back in time for the date. The longer he sat out there the more she thought he might still back out.

When she saw him finally get up, she rushed to a mirror to make one last check on her make-up. She waited a minute after the knock before opening the door not wanting to seem too eager.

"You're late," she blurted her nerves getting the better of her. _Great Cait way to set the tone._ "Uh, I mean why did you sit out there so long?" She blushed and ducked her head.

_Oh, Caitlin, if only you knew how cute you are when you get flustered._ Hawke smiled. "You look great."

"Well, don't sound so surprised," she said finally getting past the nervousness.

They stood awkwardly in the door a moment.

"Well, I guess we'd better go."

~~AW~~

"I see you finally got your appetite back," Hawke said as Cait tore into the cheesecake she'd ordered for desert.

"Hey, it's not often I get the chance to really eat on a date," she said. "Usually, I eat an hour or two before, so I can order something light at dinner. It gives me more time to get to know the guy I'm with. Plus if it goes badly, I can cut it short because I don't have to wait on desert."

"Does that mean I'm doing okay?" He grinned.

"So far, so good," she said before taking another bite.

"You want to dance?"

"Sure."

Hawke led her to the dance floor. He pulled her close.

"So, you want to do this again tomorrow?" he whispered in her ear.

She took a step back from him and regarded him steadily.

"Hawke…exactly what's going on here?"

He looked at the band, and then looked down at their feet and arms. "Dancing," he said with a smile.

"I know that," she said. "I mean why all of a sudden are you asking me out? Last month you were all set on not even listening to me, about jumping in to something with someone you barely knew, and now you want to date? I don't get it?"

He didn't answer for a long time. He didn't know how to answer. He couldn't very well admit that he thought she was pregnant with his baby. She'd think that was the only reason he wanted her. And, his excuses for keeping her distant were all still there. He knew he had fallen for her when her plane was missing. Dom almost called him on it then.

It had been easy to keep her at arm's length when she obviously wanted more. But, when she started to pull away, he'd drawn her deeper into his life. He'd even quit dating or not exactly letting her know he was seeing anyone. He hadn't wanted to hurt her even though he had to keep her at a distance.

He finally decided to tell her the truth, part of it anyway.

"I guess all that stuff with CC got me thinking. I thought I was going to lose you…for good. After you left the cabin that morning…you were still around, but…it wasn't the same. I…need you…as more than a friend…even a close friend."

He looked deeply into her eyes. "Take a chance with me Cait?"

They had stopped dancing. Caitlin searched his eyes. She had waited so long to hear something like that from him that she wasn't sure she was dreaming.

"I think I'm ready to go home."

~~AW~~

Hawke walked Caitlin to her door in silence just like their car ride home. She unlocked her door and turned back to him. She put a hand on the lapel to his brown blazer.

"Hawke…," she began.

He slipped his arms around her and gave her a long lingering kiss that curled her toes.

She moistened her lips as he pulled away. She'd totally forgotten what she had wanted to say.

"Are you going to invite me in?" he said before giving her a series of small kisses.

On the last, she nodded. They made their way to the sofa and sat down. Hawke leaned in to kiss her again, but she stopped him.

"Wait," she said. "Look Hawke what do you want here? I don't want to do something we'll regret in the morning…I saw your face last time…If I hadn't of pushed you away, you would have."

Hawke lowered his head not able to deny what she said. She started to pull away. His head came up quickly.

"Caitlin, I don't want to lose you."

She smiled a little sadly. "We'll always be friends Hawke."

"What if, that's not good enough anymore?"

"Do you really think you can let me in? Share everything with me? You haven't even told me where you and Dom went yesterday that you didn't want me to go. Like I said before, I don't think you're ready."

"Caitlin," he sighed. "Dom and I went after Carrie."

"What? You didn't think I would want to be in on that?"

"I knew if you and she got anywhere near each other one of you would end up dead. I didn't want it to be you."

"You should have let me decide. I'm not a kid, Hawke. I can decide for myself if the risk is worth it."

They sat in silence for a few minutes. She knew he was only trying to protect her, but, sometimes it made her feel like he doubted her competence.

"If you really want to be with me, you can't smother me. You have to live with the possibility that I won't come back someday. I face that every time you go off in Airwolf. But, I don't try to keep you from it."

"I can't change overnight. But, I want a life with you, a family."

"I don't want you to change. I just don't want to live in fear with you."

"Does that mean you'll give me a chance?"

"Tell you what we'll see how it goes for the next couple of months." She kissed him on the cheek and gave him a pillow for the sofa.

~~AW~~

Dom studied his two young co-workers for most of the day. He knew they'd gone on their date, but neither had mentioned it since. At least they hadn't mentioned it in his hearing.

He was bursting at the seams to know what had happened. Well, maybe not everything that happened, but at least whether or not they'd be going out again.

Dom had long held the belief that those two were meant for each other. It was just hard trying to convince them of that; or, trying to convince String to commit his heart openly. He had a pretty good idea of how Caitlin felt about his boy. He'd seen the evidence on more than one occasion. And, he was pretty sure that String felt the same way, but wouldn't risk it. That String had taken Cait out on a real date, had come as quite a happy shock for Dom.

He'd been trying all day to drop subtle hints for them to start talking. He was about to give up and just outright ask String preferably when Cait wasn't around when the phone rang.

"Santini Air," he answered with cheer.

"Ms. Caitlin O'Shannessy, please." The female voice on the other end said.

"Cait," Dom yelled. "It's for you."

"Well, who is it?" she called from the table where she and Hawke were cleaning parts.

"I run an air service not an answering service." Dom laid the receiver on the desk confident that he scored on that shot. He made his way over to String thinking this his opportunity to ask questions.

Caitlin gave him a sideways smile. She snatched up the receiver not even bothering to shut the office door.

"So how'd it go?" Dom asked with a wide grin on his face.

"How'd what go?" String deadpanned.

"The Macy's Day Parade. What do you think, your date with Cait?"

String gave him a half grin. "She said she give me chance."

Dom slapped him on the back. "Oh boy, I knew you two were perfect for each other."

"Shush, Dom. I'm trying to listen."

Hawke's suspicions were just confirmed by Caitlin's side of her phone conversation.

"This is Cait."

"Ms. O'Shannessy this is Jill, from the clinic. I was calling about your blood tests. Do you have someone who could bring you over immediately?"

"My tests? Do you have the results?"

"Well, yes can you come in so the doctor can discuss it with you?"

"Just tell me what you found?"

"The doctor wants you to come in right away so we can run a few more tests. Some of the results of the previous tests need to be confirmed."

"Confirmed?"

"I'm sorry as you know we ran a variety of tests to rule out some conditions. We even ran a pregnancy test…"

"I can't be pregnant."

"As I said we ran some tests to rule conditions out. However, the results of a few are a cause of concern. Do you have someone who can bring you right over? The doctor said you shouldn't drive yourself."

"Sure, but..?"

"Great come as soon as possible. We need to confirm the results so we can begin treatment."

"Okay, I'll be right there." She hung up the phone and headed back out to the hangar. The call was upsetting. What could she possibly have that needed treatment? Maybe her stomach bug was a little more serious than she thought.

"Dom that was the Doctor's office. They want me to come over right away. Can you give me a ride? They said I shouldn't drive."

"Is everything okay honey," Dom said with sudden concern.

"I don't know. They want to run some more tests."

"I'll take her," Hawke said getting up from the table. He figured that if something were wrong with Cait or the baby, he should be there.

"I'll go change." Cait said absently her mind already imagining all kinds of things.

Dom stopped Hawke as he started to go change out of his coveralls.

"What's going on? I though she just had a stomach bug?"

"Dom, Cait and I…got together the weekend after she got out of the hospital. She's…pregnant," Hawke admitted.

Dom's demeanor did a one eighty. "That's great String, congratulations," he said with enthusiasm already planning how he would spoil his grandbaby.

"Not if something's wrong."

Dom's concern returned as quickly as it left. "Hey, I'll come too."

"No, Dom. She hasn't said anything about the baby. She doesn't know I know. But, I have to be there."

"Oh," Dom said. Then with more understanding he gave a more drawn out, "OH! Is that why you suddenly asked her out?"

"Dom, I have to change. We'll talk about this later."

~~AW~~

Hawke sat pensively in the waiting room. Since he'd arrived with Caitlin over an hour ago, he had become increasingly worried. A nurse had met them as they walked through the door and led Cait off down a corridor. When he started to follow, she pointed toward the waiting room. He'd been waiting ever since. It didn't help his mood any that every time he asked the nurse's station about Cait they just told him to be patient and that there should be some news soon.

He was therefore less inclined to be civil when Archangel dressed in his all white three piece suit sauntered through the door.

"Hawke, they told me you were terrorizing the nurses here."

"Michael," Hawke said striding purposefully toward him. "You'd better tell me what's going on here. They've had Cait in there over an hour and nobody's talking."

"I was just on my way to find out. Care to join me?"

Hawke gave him a suspicious glare before following him down the hall.


	12. Chapter 12:  Next step

Archangel was stopped just outside of Caitlin's room by a lady in white. Hawke gave him an irritated look and continued on into the room.

Cait turned from the window as Hawke entered. She set up a little more in the hospital bed and smoothed the covers to her side.

"Hey," Hawke said. He gave her a smile and sat down beside her on the bed. He picked up her hand to hold it in his. "What did the doctor say?"

She watched him a moment. He wasn't exactly looking her in the eyes. Something about how he was acting seemed off. Voluntarily sitting on her bed and holding her hand wasn't his normal MO. She guessed he was trying after his declaration of wanting her in his life.

"They say I'll be alright after a while. They're going to keep me in here for a few days. Turns out it wasn't a stomach bug after all…"

He squeezed her hand anticipating the moment when she'd reveal her pregnancy.

"…I've been poisoned."

"What?" A mixture of concern and disappointment flashed across his face before his features settled into a mask. He'd been so sure of her condition. Now, he knew she hadn't been pregnant, but Hawke had begun to warm up to the idea of not only having a family but of having it with Cait, only Cait.

"Poisoned systematically ever since she left the hospital last month," Archangel said from the door. He stepped up to the end of Caitlin's bed.

Hawke hastily got up at Michael's entrance as if he were caught doing something wrong.

The spy filed Hawke's actions for later amusement. He'd been aware of Hawke's recent protectiveness. The agent he had on Caitlin's surveillance since the incident with CC had also reported on the 'date.' On a personal level, Michael was glad that Hawke may finally let himself have a little happiness. On the professional side, there were too many variables for him to be comfortable. Perhaps he could force the issue a little.

"Stephanie searched your house. She found a cylinder attached to your kitchen sink. Every time you used your tap you ingested more poison. It seems CC had at least one backup plan. I wouldn't put it past her to have more than one. The doctors agreed to release you in a few days if you respond well to the treatment, but you can't go back to your house. It's too easy of a target. You will need someone to look after you for at least a couple more weeks. Do you have somewhere to go that's secure? If I don't have to keep you under surveillance that's one more agent I can have searching for CC."

"Michael, I won't stay in protective custody. I refuse to live my life in fear." She couldn't help the furtive glance she gave Hawke.

Michael stroked his mustache to hide his smile.

"Well, maybe I can ask Stephanie if she wouldn't mind a house guest."

"No, Michael. I'm not…"

"She'll stay with me." Hawke cut in with force. "And, Michael, if you can't catch that woman then I'll take care of it, personally." Hawke left the room.

"Well, I guess that settles that," Michael said with a smile. He turned to leave.

"Michael?"

He stopped at the door and looked back.

"Am I really in that much danger?" Caitlin asked.

"Cait, the FBI has done a behavioral analysis on CC. She's become fixated on you. She won't stop until either you're dead or she is. Your best bet is to drop off the radar for a while. Hawke's cabin is perfect for that. Besides, this could draw her out; make it easier to find her. There are only a couple of ways to the cabin. At least there one can either see or hear someone coming. Don't worry Cait one way or another we'll get her."

~~AW~~

"Are you ready to get out of here?" Dom asked from the hospital door.

"Sure, I am." Caitlin looked past Dom. No Hawke in sight so much for changing his behavior. Once again he'd seen her to the hospital then didn't show again. She wondered if he really hated hospitals or something, but he seemed to be having fun when he an Dom were laid up after a stunt gone wrong with balsa wood. She started to stand.

"Unh uh, not without a wheel chair you don't" an orderly came in pushing the wheeled contraption.

"Is that really necessary?"

"The doctors said the counter agents you're taking will make you weak and sleepy for several days, Ms. O'Shannessy," the man said reprovingly.

"Fine," she sat in the chair and was wheeled out to the waiting jeep.

Caitlin was silent for the trip back to the hangar. After a couple of miles, Dom realized she was asleep.

"Hey honey," Dom gently shook her awake. "We're here."

"Hmm? Oh, I guess I fell asleep."

"It's okay. You just wait right here until I get the chopper started."

"Chopper? Where are we going?"

"Up to String's cabin. I thought you knew. String's been moving all your stuff up there since you went to the hospital. He's worked on nothing but getting one of the new bedrooms off the back ready for you. I guess Lee won't get to pick which one he gets after all. Boy is he going to be surprised when he gets back from summer camp. Not only does he get a room of his own, but you'll be there too."

"Wait. Hawke's got me moved in? I thought I was just staying there until I recovered."

Dom helped her to the chopper.

"Well, yeah. I guess with the baby and all he just felt this would be quicker."

"Baby?"

"Oh, I'm sorry honey. I know you thought String didn't know about it. But, there's nothing to worry about. String will do everything he can to take care of you and the baby. Don't tell him I let it slip will ya?"

"Dom, wait a minute. How long has Hawke thought I was pregnant?"

"Well, since right before we went to the Caribbean I guess."

The wheels began to turn in Cait's head. This explained a lot. Hawke's sudden desire to have a relationship with her and the speed at which he was trying to pursue it clicked into place. He suddenly wanted to be with her not because her peril or anything else had made him realize he loved her, but because he thought her pregnant.

"Dom," she said stifling a yawn, "I'm not pregnant. CC poisoned me. That's why I was tired, not very hungry, and threw up all the time."

Dom hung his head in obvious disappointment.

"I can't believe Hawke didn't tell you."

"Well, he's still got you all moved in, that must mean something."

"I guess it means he's finally found a way of protecting me without having to sleep on my couch."

Dom started laughing. When he finally calmed down he noticed Caitlin was asleep again.

~~AW~~

In a private hospital on the east coast a pair of chocolate brown eyes one slightly higher than the other opened. They surveyed the room. On the bedside table was a fresh bouquet of sunflowers. Despite the pain it caused him to do so the man lying in the hospital bed smiled. Where ever he was, he was okay. The sunflowers confirmed that.

An alarm went off when he turned his head. Shortly several nurses and doctors invaded his room. They poked and prodded and pulled out several tubes. When they were all done only one doctor remained.

"I know you have a lot of questions" the doctor said. "All will be revealed in due time. I don't know how much you remember, but a lot of people are going to ask a lot of questions. It's in your best interest to feign amnesia. The sender of those flowers has made all the arrangements in case you wake up. You won't be in here long. Just stay calm, and don't remember."

The doctor left immediately after his cryptic speech. The man lay back against his hospital bed, thinking.

Ever since they were kids, the sunflowers had been a signal between them. They basically meant I've taken care of the problem all will be well. They were the same flowers that adorned the casket of their mother.

_Aw Mother._ He hadn't thought about her in a long time. A wicked smile broke out on his face. She was his first in so many ways. He was so relieved when CC had taken care of her for him. The whore never should have started cheating on their dad. The only problem was that he hadn't had the courage to do it for himself. But CC had helped him with that too.

Not long after their mothers 'suicide' CC had found him the perfect surrogate. A woman the same height and build as their mother. She even had the same hair color. When he raped her he finally felt the satisfaction he'd craved. The woman was easily paid off. But after several more dalliances on his part, it hadn't been enough anymore. After all they had all wanted to do it with him, and despite their protests to the contrary he knew they wanted him to dominate them. He had to prove to them that he was man enough that was the only way they'd be satisfied with his performance.

Caitlin was going to be his next step. With her he was not only going to enjoy raping her, but he would also have the satisfaction of watching the life drain from her body while he did it. She would have been forever caught in the moment of his release. It was supposed to be his gift to her.

Chad Carter had thought many times about that night so many years ago. It hadn't of been the same thing killing Carl. Satisfying, yes, but not in the way he wanted. He hoped CC hadn't succeeded in killing Caitlin yet. He wanted to do it himself.


	13. Chapter 13:  Hawke's review

He looked at himself in the mirror. Lately, he wasn't sure he knew who he was anymore. For more years than he cared to remember he'd been alone. He thought he'd made his peace with it a long time ago. He was wrong. Underneath deep, deep down he knew he hadn't changed but somehow he just wasn't the same either. He wasn't quite sure how to reconcile who he knew himself to be, the man he was once upon a time, and the man he'd become.

He'd always liked coming home to his cabin. When he was there it seemed like the rest of the world and all its problems didn't matter. He could finally relax from the constant state of vigilance he held. Lately, coming home had been so much more. He knew when he walked in the door that Caitlin would be there. He'd be greeted by her brilliant smile and eagerness to hear how things were at the hangar.

It caused him and Dom quite a bit of amusement when she'd kicked him out after the first two weeks. She had said that if he wouldn't stop his hovering she'd either take her chances finding her own way back to civilization or shoot him. He compromised first by staying out of her way by chopping wood, fishing, and hiking. Finally, she told him to get back to work. She was by that time recovering nicely from the poisoning and was able to take care of herself.

Last night had been great. He'd come home to dinner waiting for him. He'd never been the old fashion type expecting his wife to be a homemaker, but Cait had surprised him with dinner. He had begun to wonder what it would be like to be married to her. He knew she probably wouldn't want to stay forever the way things currently were. Technically they were roommates, or housemates, however you wanted to put it. They were living together but she had her own room. And, surprisingly he liked her living with him. He thought he was too old and set in his ways to share his home with a woman. She opened his eyes to the way things could be if she stayed.

Cait was okayed to go back to work in a couple of days and Lee would be home from summer camp soon. His whole life had been turned upside down and was about to be again. He knew she'd want to 'define' things soon. He didn't want her to leave. He wanted her to stay, maybe forever.

She was downstairs making breakfast. He needed to go down and eat if he wanted to be done by the time Dom arrived.

"After that dinner last night you really didn't have to make breakfast this morning." He said with a smile as he made his way down stairs.

She met his smile with the full force of her own.

"Hey, like I said last night I want to thank you for letting me stay while I convalesced. Besides I need to start pulling my own weight again. I get to go back to work day after tomorrow remember."

She placed the toast on the table and went to get the orange juice.

Hawke frowned at her inadvertent reminder. She was fully recovered now and as such her reason for being there was evaporating. She'd never mentioned the fact that he'd completely moved her in without her consent. She didn't even mention that the house she had rented had since been rented to someone else. She had let him call the shots, but was now pulling away again. After last night, he couldn't really blame her.

Dinner had been great. They'd talked about the hangar, and Lee coming home. When the conversation threatened to get intimate, they both took the opportunity to clean up. There was an awkward moment when it was clear neither wanted the evening to end. On the spur of the moment he'd asked her to dance. She had laughed at first, but acquiesced at his gentle teasing.

After a few smooth dance moves, they settled into a comfortable rhythm. They both felt the heat between them rise. The attraction that had always been there was hard to ignore. They held each other close. He had both of his arms around her waist. She had hers around his neck. Their bodies stretched out against each other. Before he knew it he was kissing her neck. It was when he pressed her pelvis into his and captured her lips that he realized what he was doing. She realized it too.

The kiss ended abruptly both of them breathing hard.

Caitlin could feel his erection through their clothes. She wanted to be with him again wanted it more than she had wanted to fly Airwolf. But, she had made a promise to herself after that one night. A promise she hadn't exactly been living up to lately. Reluctantly she slid her hands from his neck. She rested one on his chest.

"Thanks for the dance," she said with a soft sadness. "I guess I'll see you in the morning." She slipped out of his embrace and headed for her room.

He had thought about what happened most of the night. He squelched his initial impulse to stop her retreat. He stopped himself repeated times during the night from knocking on her door. He was confused about what to do. He didn't want her to leave, but how could she stay. After the mixed signals, he had given her in the past; he thought he finally realized what he had been putting her through. Even when he moved her into the cabin, he'd set her up in her own room.

A hand appeared waiving itself in front of his eyes. He looked up at Cait.

"Thought I'd lost you for good there," she quipped. "You'd better start eating. I think Dom just landed the chopper."

Now that he was aware of his surroundings again, Hawke could hear the rotors of the chopper landed at the dock slowing their rotation.

"Dom must have smelled the cooking. I think he might stay for breakfast."

"Great," she said delighted. "I'm not used to cooking for more than just myself and I think I made too many pancakes."

"Don't worry too much about that, I'm sure Lee will eat anything you put in front of him when he gets here."

"Hawke..," she began.

Dom opened the front door and took his red cap off at the same time.

"You got enough pancakes and coffee for one more?"

"Sure Dom," Hawke invited. "At least until Lee gets here and eats more than all of us combined."

~~AW~~

Dom sat behind his desk thinking more than working. He'd seen the change in his boy since Caitlin had moved into the cabin. String was happy. That girl had changed his boy since the beginning.

String had climbed into Airwolf yelling at Dom to get everything ready to lift off as soon as possible. He had to get back to save the girl they'd seen on the road the previous night. String spoke about her with a mixture of disbelief and awe. He'd called her a kid but Dom could tell String was intrigued if not interested then she showed up in California. Boy did that throw String for a loop. Despite the perils Caitlin found herself in soon thereafter she and String had a lot of fun together. He'd never made a move on her though. He took his time getting to know her.

Dom had noticed every time it seemed like she might have a reason to leave, String would draw her in just a little bit more. This last time, he completely moved her in with him. Dom couldn't fail to notice at breakfast that morning that Cait was restless. She had recovered and was now probably questioning her place at the cabin. Dom wondered what String would do now.

"I'm back, Dom," String called out from just inside the hangar door. "Are you ready to take me home?"

He put his large double sacked v shaped package down on the desk as he slumped into a chair in the office.

"What's that?"

"What's what?"

"That collection of sacks you just dropped on my desk."

"Well, you see what it is," String avoided answering.

"I see a bunch of plastic. What's in it?"

"Just something I picked up. Now are we going or what?"

An idea struck Dom. "Who's it for?"

"Nobody," String answered too quickly. "It's just something for the cabin."

"Oh. And, would this something be flowers? She likes white carnations you know."

"I know what she likes," came the irritated reply. "But, they're for the cabin. I just thought it might brighten the place up a little."

"And you might as well get white carnations as anything else see in as how you just want to 'brighten the place up.'"

"Dom, can we just go?"

"Why don't you take the chopper yourself? It will save me having to make a return trip and the two of you can take your time at breakfast. Or, better yet you can take tomorrow off."

"Dom, don't go reading anything into this. They're just flowers."

"Sure, String, sure."

String gave him a sideway grin as he picked up the flowers and headed out to the chopper.

"Hawke," the southern accent of Michael Coldsmith-Briggs came through the hangar door. "Where are you off to?"

"No, Michael," Hawke said as he tried to side step the spy. "I'm going home."

"But you don't even know what I'm here for." Michael couldn't help the grin on his face. He recognized the bundle Hawke carried.

"It doesn't matter. I'm heading home. Dom even gave me tomorrow off. So, whatever it is the answer is no."

"Perfect it's just a quick extraction. You should be back tomorrow morning at the latest. You can sleep the day away after that. I'll even keep Caitlin company while you're gone."

That last remark earned Michael a glare from Hawke. The last person Michael had looked after while he was gone on a mission was Kiki. He'd only seen her once since then, at the FIRM, wearing white.

"Stephanie here has the file."

His assistant handed Hawke the file. She went to take the flowers from Hawke but was intercepted by Michael who snatched them away.

"Don't worry Hawke," he said with a smile. "I'll make sure to deliver these to Caitlin personally." He tipped his cane in Hawke direction then strolled leisurely back to his waiting limousine.

~~AW~~

Hawke crept his way down the hall toward the last door. The agent he was there to extract was supposed to be alone, but it didn't hurt to be cautious. He listened at the door. He clearly heard two voices beyond. The hall offered no place to hide so he retreated to the room next to his target. He opened the door and ducked inside quickly ready for whatever was on the other side. After a full sweep he determined the room to be empty. He took position beside the door holding it open a crack to survey the hall. Now he had to wait. He hoped none of the many people in the villa would decide to use the room he now occupied.

After ten minutes, he heard a thump come from his radio. He thumped it back twice the signal that he wasn't ready yet. Very much longer and both he and Airwolf risked detection. Just then a man came swiftly down the hall. Hawke held his breath but the man knocked on his target's door.

The door was opened by a man and the two spoke. They left rapidly. Hawke slipped into the hall and tapped on the last door.

"What do you want now, Pter?" came a frustrated female voice as she opened the door.

Hawke elbowed his way in gun held high with a finger to his lips indicating silence. The woman rapidly retreated. She grabbed a gun and spun around on Hawke while he was peeking out the door into the hall.

"You'd better explain yourself quickly or I'll shoot you where you stand."

Hawke turned slowly around.

"Look lady, you're the one who wanted an extraction. I didn't come all this way just to see the scenery."

"I'm not falling for your tricks. How do I know you're not here to kill me?"

"I swear this is the last time I let Michael talk me into a blind pick up."

"Michael? You know Archangel?"

"Yeah."

"You were supposed to be here ten minutes ago."

"You weren't exactly alone and if you don't get moving soon, I'm going to leave without you."

"Okay, just let me grab a coat and some shoes."

_Why is it every time I pick up a woman they're dressed for bed instead of running?_

Within minutes they were making their way back down the hall. Two guards came around a corner. His new companion shot one while Hawke shot the other. The shots set off a chaos of motion. Their escape route blocked the woman opened a side door and headed up some narrow stairs. Hawke followed eluding would be captors for the moment.

"I hope you have a plan lady. This doesn't exactly look like the way out."

"It's Nadia. And, this leads to the roof. We'll go undetected there until we can make it out."

The stairs led to a small attic room with one window facing the back of the house. They opened the window and stepped out onto the roof. Nadia shivered in the sleek night gown she wore. Hawke closed the window just as he heard steps on the stairs. They moved across the roof to the edge.

The small window opened and a head peaked out to scan the roof. Shouts rang out and someone started shooting in their direction when they were spotted from the window.

"Dom, change of plans," Hawke radioed. "Pick us up."

Within minutes bullets were flying and Dom was hovering Airwolf near the edge of the roof. Hawke covered Nadia as she climbed into the cockpit. He fired off a couple of more shots before climbing in himself.

As soon as they were safely away from the villa, Dom handed Nadia a blanket.

"Here you go miss."

"Thank you. My name is Nadia."

"Pleased to meet you, Nadia. I'm Dominick Santini and your pilot today is Stringfellow Hawke."

"Santini and Hawke?" she said with wonder. "Then this must be Airwolf. Archangel really came through on this. When he said he'd send the best, he really did."

"You hear that String? The white wonder must like us after all." Dom chuckled to himself.

"Yeah," Hawke said, "then why does he keep sending us places to get us shot."

"Ah, you know him. He wouldn't want us to think he cared or anything. After all, he does have a reputation to maintain."

"That's what I'm afraid of," Hawke said his mind already turning to more domestic matters.


	14. Chapter 14:  Back at the cabin

Stringfellow Hawke smiled as he stepped up on to the porch of his cabin home. Dom had declined to join him saying he'd much rather sleep half a day in his own bed so he could easily make it back to Santini Air later. Hawke figured Dom would probably sack out on the cot at the hangar until someone woke him for business. He didn't push too much. Hawke wanted to check on Caitlin and would prefer to do that without Dom's watchful knowing eyes.

The cabin was quiet and dark with only the soft glow from lights illuminating various pieces of artwork. Tet didn't greet him which made him frown. He made his way past the sofa and wet bar to what used to be the back door but now opened to a hall leading to two bedrooms and a bathroom. He stopped at the first door and opened it cautiously.

Tet, his blue tick hound raised his head from his paws and looked at him quizzically. He rose stretching from his position on the floor at the foot of the bed. He looked back at the sleeping occupant of the bed before padding over to his favorite person for a scratch behind the ears.

Hawke couldn't help but smile down at the dog. After a friendly petting, he pushed past Hawke to the hall; it looked like Tet was protecting Cait while he was gone now that he was back though the dog wanted to get back to his natural place by the hearth either upstairs or in the living room.

Only one light was present in the room. It illuminated a painting he acquired several months ago. He and Cait had been at an art gallery trying to track down some schematics for ground to air missiles. She'd admired the painting. He gone back later and purchased it. It wasn't until he'd started building on to the cabin that he'd thought about his reasons for doing so.

Hawke leaned against the door frame to gaze at the woman in the bed. He loved watching Caitlin sleep. It was one of the rare times that she was completely still. Awake even when at rest like reading a book or watching TV, she had so much vibrancy that she seemed to be constantly in motion.

He was unaware of how long he stood there watching her, but finally exhaustion sent him up the stairs to bed.

~~~AW~~~

Caitlin was pleasantly surprised to find Michael making crepes for breakfast the next morning. She slid onto the bar stool and took the plate he handed her while he finished the conversation he was having on the satellite phone.

Upstairs the door to the master suite lay opened. Hawke had decided he might need more privacy when he built on to the cabin to accommodate his nephew. He had yet to sleep with the door to his room closed. He may need the privacy at some time but until then wanted to hear what was going on in the rest of the cabin. Downstairs the voices below had awakened Hawke. He dressed swiftly and crossed over to the threshold looking out on the old sleeping loft.

"No. No. I can't authorize that at this time. Look as soon as I get there, I'll review the file. Well, they'll just have to wait." Michael hung up the phone before turning to Cait. "I take it you slept well?"

"Quite well, you know you didn't need to make breakfast."

"Oh, I found dealing with Hawke to be much easier when I've had a civilized breakfast." He smiled then placed the last crepe on a plate. After dropping the skillet into the sink, he picked up his plate and joined her at the bar.

"I take it the mission was successful?" she said between mouthfuls.

"Imminently, the agent he picked up has invaluable information on arms trafficking in the Middle East, plus, a few choice tidbits on the Soviet situation in Afghanistan. We'll be debriefing her for some time."

Caitlin sighed and glanced over wistfully to the vase of flowers sitting on the bar. Michael had brought them the night before along with news that Hawke was going on a mission. The two of them had enjoyed dinner and wine. Michael had poured on the charm and at one point she thought he was trying to seduce her. She commented on the flowers and he reluctantly admitted that he had acquired them from Hawke. They'd then had a quick none too productive conversation about protection and friendships.

"You've settled in nicely here," Michael commented. He sipped his coffee and studied her over the rim.

Upstairs Hawke halted at Michael's words and waited for Caitlin's response.

Cait snapped her attention back to him. She wondered at the comment. "It's a nice place to stay for a while." She said non-committal.

"But, not permanently?" Michael asked in the most uninterested way possible.

"For someone who claims he isn't a friend, you sure are interested in personal business, Michael."

"And you're avoiding the question," he said with obvious delight at her discomfort.

She smiled at him ruefully. "I love the cabin…"

"But?"

"But, I can't be a house guest forever. I mean what happens when Hawke or I decided to…uh well to…" she blushed. "I mean it would be hard enough to have a date with a teenage boy hanging around. How would you explain living with someone?"

"I think that would only be a problem if the date wasn't with Hawke." Michael stroked his mustache to hide the grin forming on his lips.

Caitlin gave him a shocked look.

"I had you under a friendly eye while you insisted on staying at your own place, remember. Mary said you two had quite a kiss on the porch." He smiled at her while finishing off his crepe.

Caitlin turned bright pink and a little irate. "I didn't know my relationship or lack thereof was fodder for FIRM gossip."

"That wounds me to the core," Michael returned with mock sincerity. "It only concerns _me_ as far as it impacts the ability of **all** of Airwolf's crew to perform. Besides, my money's on Marella."

Caitlin choked on her orange juice. "Hawke and Marella?" she asked.

Hawke had heard enough and began to make his way down the stairs.

"No," Michael said hurriedly glancing toward the man descending the stairs. More quietly so only Cait could hear he said, "On winning the office pool on you two."

"Michael," Hawke bit out while heading for the coffee. "I didn't realize I was running a bed and breakfast." He poured himself a generous portion and sipped on it glaring Michael down.

"I just thought I'd show Caitlin how a civilized man treated a woman to breakfast." Michael gave Cait a nod. "Besides I need to debrief you on last night's extraction."

"Well, I guess that's my cue to take a walk," Caitlin said as she slid off the bar stool. She was half way to the door when Hawke spoke.

"You don't have to leave Cait."

Something in the tone of his voice had her turning around to look at him. She told herself she must have imagined it when she saw he was still glaring down Michael.

"And hear how everything was fine until you started to leave and out of nowhere bullets started flying so you barely made it out alive," she quipped. "No thanks."

She grabbed her jacket and shut the door behind her.

"She knows you too well. From what I heard of the report so far, that's exactly how it happened."

"If you know what happened then what's to debrief?" Hawke's gaze hardened before he grabbed the last plate of crepes and crossed over to the bar.

Michael sighed. "Hawke, I need to know if was all a little too convenient?"

"Convenient? Michael, I almost got shot trying to climb in Airwolf off a less than level roof. I wouldn't call that convenient."

"But, was it too easy?"

"What are you getting at Michael?"

"I've had some unconfirmed reports that Nadia was very 'cozy' with a Pter Noskovic. He's KGB specially trained in foreign infiltration."

"You think she's turned?"

"It's possible."

Hawke looked thoughtful a moment reviewing the events of the mission. Then he looked up and to the side. "I guess you'll have to figure that out on your own. Your ride's here."

A few moments later the sound of a chopper could be heard coming closer to the cabin. Michael collected his cane and headed for the door.

"By the way Hawke," he said in parting. "Cait and I shared and excellent dinner last night. I must commend your taste in wine. And, the flowers turned out to be her favorite nice touch that."

Hawke's took an angry step forward as Michael opened the door for a quick exit.

"Oh, I told her about the file on CC I gave you. She was most upset at your less than stellar ability to share."


	15. Chapter 15

So I've quit naming chapters. It takes too much effort on my part and I'm lazy. Not saying I won't name one or two in the future, just don't expect it. I tried to take this story into a more action oriented line but I kept coming back to the relationship building pieces. Don't worry CC and Chad will return in later chapters they're just recovering from recent set-backs right now.

Chapter: 15

Hawke considered what Michael had said and, more to the point, what he hadn't said. His thoughts were in turmoil. Was Michael really making a play for Cait and why? Why now? Was she interested? Those questions and more filled his mind.

His own relationship with Cait was … complicated and yet easy at the same time. Her being in his life, easy, welcome, wanted, even he admitted reluctantly needed but, being _around_ her complicated. Half of the time they were great together good friends sharing good times. Theirs was a friendship to rely on. He knew they'd both do anything for each other. But, there were times when she obviously had wanted more and times when he…. He pushed that thought away, forced his concentration onto the matter of CC's file.

He should have shown it to Cait right after Michael had given it to him. He didn't because he wanted to protect her. Keep her from the knowledge of how she'd been manipulated since college by the Carter family. He was glad she was here though, even if the price had been high, her fiancé, his friend Jimmy, Villars, and Sawyer. He could imagine her fiery temper when Michael revealed that Hawke had CC's file. He caught himself smiling at the image of Cait in all her righteous indignation.

He glanced at the carnations he'd bought the previous day and sighed. He'd meant them to be…well it didn't matter, especially since Michael had obviously taken credit.

Hawke pushed away his half eaten food and decided on his next course of action.

Caitlin came back from her walk about an hour after Archangel left. Hawke was waiting, ready. He grabbed his fishing pole and met her on the porch.

"Hey Cait," he said casually. "You want to go fishing?"

"Oh, I don't know Hawke…" She had really just wanted to relax for the day since she'd be heading back to work tomorrow.

"What's the matter? You afraid I'll out fish you again?" he teased. They'd been in a friendly fishing competition complete with bragging rights since he'd first discovered she enjoyed it as much as he did.

Never one to back down from a direct challenge, Cait put her hands on her hips and flashed him a smile. "You're on Cowboy, same terms?"

His grin widened. "Whoever loses cooks and cleans them. I think I'll have mine baked with rice pilaf."

"In your dreams Hawke, they'll be fried with a salad on the side."

Out in the middle of the lake, it was quiet and peaceful. The morning sun bathed everything in golden light and turned the water's surface into a mirror of mountains and sky.

Cait abandoned fishing early on to just relax and soak up the sun. She trailed her hands in the water a little and flicked it at Hawke playfully until his continued scowls had her subsiding. Finally, she just leaned back on her elbows, closed her eyes, and leaned her head back to face the sky.

Hawke found himself watching her admiring her ability to embrace life fully even in relaxing. He braced himself not really wanting to disturb her peace but knowing they needed to talk. He'd brought them out to the middle of the lake so she couldn't get too upset with him. He cleared his throat.

"You and Michael seemed awfully cozy this morning." He had meant for it to come out teasing, but couldn't help the accusatory tone.

"Hmm," she responded absently.

He tried again, "I didn't know you were crepes in the morning kind of girl. It's a little fancy for my taste."

Caitlin raised her head to look at him. He had a smirk on his face and she couldn't see his eyes for the sunglasses he wore. She considered carefully for a moment before shrugging.

"He asked me if I could have anything for breakfast in the morning what would it be. Since I know you don't own a waffle iron, I said crepes. After the dinner he made, I really didn't expect a fancy breakfast too. I thought it was sweet of him."

Hawke snorted at the idea. "_Sweet_ does not describe _Michael_. Boy, does he have you fooled."

"He is full of surprises."

Hawke unconsciously frowned at her wistful tone.

She half smiled at his reaction.

"He showed up last night to keep me company while you went off with Dom. He said he didn't want me getting lonely. He even had my favorite flowers. And dinner…it was elegant and sophisticated besides, who knew Michael could cook. It was quite a date."

Caitlin was glad her own sunglasses hid the amusement in her eyes as Hawke scowled.

_Date?_ Hawke had to stop himself mid-stream from wiping off his glasses to stare at her. He hastily turned the motion into a swat at an imaginary nat. Hawke had had enough of talking about Michael. He pulled out the file he had tucked behind his bench with deliberation. He tossed it in her direction before turning his attention firmly back to fishing.

Caitlin picked up the file and read its label. Her eyes widened at the stark black and white letters. She ran her hand over the brown cover and stopped on the blue FIRM insignia not opening it. She felt Hawke watching, waiting.

She wondered how long he would wait to give her the file. She knew Michael planned to let Hawke know that she knew he had it. But, why would he give it to her out in the middle of the lake? She hadn't seen him load it with their usual fishing gear so he must have put it in the boat that morning while she was out on her walk. If that was the case, he'd planned all along to give it to her out there where she couldn't let loose her anger at being kept in the dark. He liked to treat her like a child who couldn't handle the things he and Dom did on a regular basis. Okay so she avoided killing as much as possible, but that didn't mean she was any less capable. She bit her lip. Caitlin hated it when he coddled her.

_Fine, _she thought. _We'll just play this out another way._

She set the file to the side and was satisfied at Hawke's raised eyebrow in her direction. She picked up her fishing pole. She would read the file on CC on her terms and in her own good time.

The rest of the fishing was done in silence. Hawke rolled them back to the dock and unloaded the gear. Caitlin ruthlessly cleaned the fish giving Tet choice parts of the offal before disposing of the rest where he couldn't get to the dangerously thin bones.

Caitlin laid the file in full view on the breakfast bar next to the vase of flowers. It stood as silent accuser in her mind of how Hawke vacillated between holding her close and pushing her away.

After lunch she settled on the sofa to read a book from Hawke's collection of first additions. The deception and betrayal inherit the Count of Monte Cristo seemed appropriate to her mood.

Hawke wanted to be there when she read the file. The details of how far reaching CC had affected her life, was not going to be a peasant thing to face. He spent most of the passing day playing his cello. When he noticed her holding her book to catch the fading light, he busied himself first with turning on lights and then with fixing a simple dinner of baked fish with a tossed salad.

He set the table with care putting them both at one end. Hawke lit a candle ad placed it just to the side so its soft glow wouldn't draw the attention. He chose a sweet sparkling Italian wine. It wasn't what he liked but Caitlin loved it when she tried it once while at a friend wedding. He'd kept some on hand ever since. When everything was ready, he broke the silence.

"Dinner's ready."

Caitlin finished the page she was on and placed the thin sheet of rice paper that served as her place marker on the page before closing the book and setting it on the sofa. She stopped short when she saw the table. It wasn't overly done with the finest china and crystal like the night before. It looked cozy with just a touch of romance. She hastily schooled the smile from her face as Hawke turned from the stereo to join her at the table. He poured the wine. She sipped it thoughtfully as Schubert's Ave Maria began drifting through the cabin.

"Cait," he said after she'd finished the salad and began to pick at the fish. Hawke changed what he had wanted to say at the last moment. "I want to make Lee's homecoming special, like a party. Will you help?"

"You throw a party? Are you sure you didn't get knocked on the head during that mission last night?"

"Funny. Don't get carried away. It would just be us, the family," he quickly corrected, "you, me, Dom, and half-pint. I just want him to feel like this is his home now." He laid his hand on hers, "like he's part of something special."

She looked at him intently determining if he was trying to tell her something or if this was really just about Lee. "Okay," she decided freeing her hand and retrieving her wine glass. "Tell me what you have in mind."

By the end of dinner Hawke felt they were on good footing again settling back into the friendship both found so easy. They were going to have a cookout for Lee's return complete with a cake made by Cait. She would go shopping the next day for decorations and the like.

They both cleaned up. After the water drained from the sink, he swung her around from placing the last dish in the drain. Startled, she swung the dish towel with full force giving him a sound thwack on the arm. He recoiled in mock pain.

"Remind me to never attack you with a dish. You're deadly with that thing." He teased while rubbing his arm.

"Well, that's what you get spinning me around like that." She returned without an ounce of sympathy. Her grin widened is response to his. "What were you thinking?"

"I wasn't. Thinking that is," he said all serious for the moment. Hawke held her gaze with his before stepping over to the bar and retrieving the file where it lay. He held it out to her with a small bow.

She took the file with a nod of her head accepting his apology.


	16. Chapter 16

Stringfellow Hawke walked into the main hangar at Santini Air. His gaze swept from side to side looking for an errant pair of coveralls sticking out from under a chopper. Instead, he spied Dom pouring over paperwork in the office and sauntered over.

"Hey Dom, have you seen Cait?" He leaned against the desk casually.

Dominic Santini signed off on an invoice before looking up. He batted String away from the edge of the desk.

"She went out," he said as he grabbed the paper String had been sitting on and tried to smooth out the crumples.

"When she coming back?"

"How am I'm supposed to know? She said she had to get some stuff for Lee's homecoming."

"You know you might want to put those in a folder so you don't drop them." String said with a grin on his face.

"Mr. Santini?" Everett their part-time mechanic called from the hangar door. Two sets of eyes met his. "Mr. Smithee from Universal is here."

"Right Ev. Tell him I'll be right there."

Dom gathered up the papers. He dropped one as he stood. It fluttered to the floor. String picked it up for him.

"Thanks." Dom ignored the look on String's face.

He made it as far as the door before another invoice escaped his grasp and fell just as the phone began ringing. This time when String retrieved it, he presented it to Dom with a flourish. The phone continued to ring.

Irritated at String's antics, Dom snatched the paper. "String?"

"Huh?"

"String do you mind?" he indicated the ringing phone.

String shrugged and went for the phone while Dom went to speak to the studio man.

"Santini Air," String answered in an offhand manner.

"Hawke," Archangel altered his tone. "Not the Santini employee I was hoping to _catch._"

"What do you want, Michael."

"As always your exuberance is amazing. Could you put Caitlin on? I haven't got all day to chit chat with _you._"

"Exactly _what_ do you want with Cait," the pilot's voice went from irritation to icy calm.

Just the reaction Archangel was waiting for. Back in his office at Knightsbridge, the white clad spy reclined into his white leather desk chair. He didn't even rub his mustache to hide the smile spreading across his lips. It was such a rare occasion to be able to manipulate Hawke without the pilot having a clue that he couldn't help but revel in the moment. He let the silence stretch, calculating the moment to push just that little bit more.

"Never mind, Hawke," he said dismissively. "I'll just meet up with her later."

"Michael," Hawke began through clenched teeth.

"Tell her I'll send the car around 6:30…and don't worry, _if_ she needs a ride back to the cabin…Well, I'm sure I can arrange _something._" The spy hung up before Hawke could say another word.

"Marella," he called steepling his fingers together.

"Yes sir?" came the prompt reply from the white clad beauty as she strolled into the office.

"We'll be having a third for dinner."

Marella raised her eyebrow in silent question as she leaned against his desk.

"Could you have the limo sent to Santini's to pick up Caitlin at 6:30." It wasn't a question.

"Caitlin?" Marella smiled with calculation lurking beneath dark eyes. "Does this mean you've finally decided to implement project sparrow?"

Michael studied her with suspicion before he made his cautious reply.

"Let's just say the timing may finally be right."

Careful to hide her delight, she pressed her advantage. "You have to admit sir, since she's been around Hawke has been somewhat easier to deal with. He's taking more missions with less, obstinacy."

Michael abandoned his relaxed position. "Except when it puts Caitlin in peril," he noted.

"But, overall…" she continued trying to salvage her point.

Michael cut her off. "I never said your pet project didn't have merits, Marella just that we had to be sure of the outcome. The consequences otherwise…"

Marella pondered that. "And now you're sure of the outcome?"

"Only in the quality of the woman in question," he replied.

~~~AW~~~

Dom found String to be downright grouchy when he finished up with the man from Universal. He only received monosyllable answers to any questions he asked and the boy positively clammed up when asked about the phone call. He wondered at the sudden reversal in the man he considered his son. After a fair amount of persistence, cajoling, and attempts at blackmail, he finally found out that the caller had been Archangel. He became worried when Hawke pieced out the information that it had nothing to do with an Airwolf mission and if he wanted to know what was going on he would have to ask Cait.

"…because I sure as hell don't know." Hawke finished in angry tones. He stalked out of the office and moments later Dom heard String's motorcycle rev up and drive away.

Dom shook his head. He didn't know what Michael had to do with it but String was clearly upset with Cait. Things had been building between those two for months now. He had thought that String was finally letting Cait in. After all String had moved her lock, stock, and barrel into his cabin home. But, now that he thought about, Dom figured that may be part of the current problem. His boy had kept her close, but in some ways they were further apart than ever. He knew it was only a matter of time before something broke. He just hoped he could put the pieces back together when it did.

Caitlin made it back before Sting did. She showed him the decorations and presents she'd bought for Lee.

"I just thought it would be nice if we all got him presents. Since I know neither you nor Hawke would think about it, I just went ahead and got one from each of us."

"That's real good thinking Cait. I'm sure Lee will love it. Are you sure you'll have time to decorate before I pick him up tomorrow?" Dom asked.

"As long as Hawke pitches in, sure," Cait said putting the decorations back in the bag.

"Hey is everything okay with you two?" Dom asked trying not to seem too concerned.

"As far as I know," she said.

"Good, good." _Definitely something up with String then_, Dom thought.

Caitlin turned to Dom. Her eyes narrowed on the innocent expression Dom plaster across his face. He was suddenly avoiding her gaze.

"Hey did I miss something? Did he say something to you? Where is Hawke anyhow?" Caitlin glanced around the hangar before pinning Dom with serious eyes.

"No, no I was just wondering. He uh, he said something about Michael earlier and then got all mad. Tore out of here real quick, I thought you would know what was going on."

"You know Hawke better than I do, Dom." Caitlin shrugged. "And, nobody knows what up with Michael until he wants you to know." She figured they'd both find out when Hawke came back.

~~~AW~~~

Hawke was half way to Knightsbridge before he realized where he was headed and changed course.

Half an hour later he pulled into the parking area of the beach he and St. John used to surf at when they were kids. He watched the waves come in to the shore, and wished St. John was there for him to talk to. His brother always had it so easy with people. St. John always knew how to say what he wanted to say. "_That's because I actually talk to people instead of just watching them all the time." _St. John's words came back to him and he couldn't help the smile that came to his lips.

Someone brushed past him for access to the beach and he realized how crowded it was. The last two weeks before school started had everyone and their dog crammed onto the narrow strip of sand. Hawke sighed and backed out of the parking space. He couldn't think with all those people around.

Sometime later he sat in front of a joint memorial stone with the name Hawke etched deeply into the black marble surface. At least here it was quiet. But, he still couldn't come up with the answers to the questions swirling around in his head.

He didn't know what Michael was up to, but he was definitely up to something. Cait was a good kid and he didn't want to see her hurt. He had to admit though that she didn't seem to have very good taste in men. Most of the guys she fell for were only out to use her. Michael was no exception. He knew she was too stubborn to listen to him though. She needed someone who could keep her safe when she inevitably fell into trouble.

Trouble definitely knew how to find Cait. Even when the trouble had nothing to do with Airwolf she somehow managed to be smack dab in the middle of it. Hawke frowned unconsciously at the memory first of her plane getting hijacked and then of her sorority reunion turning into a hostage situation. She had handled both incidents like a pro even though she must have been terrified.

He had to give Caitlin credit though she did know how to handle herself in sticky situations. She somehow found the courage to stay on even after Villars tried to shoot her down. She hadn't even hinted at leaving after Sawyer strapped a bomb to her. All though she did pull back from everything for a while, collecting her thoughts and sticking close to home and the hangar. She'd come through it all okay in the end. Even CC and her psycho brother hadn't kept her down for long.

His lips twitched. She really was something. She was brave and stubborn, funny and tenacious. She could kick butt dealing with the dross of society and still lend a helping hand to a complete stranger. She also had a smile that would light up any room. And, she could chew him out better than even Dom. Just like when she came up to the cabin mad as hell and told him off for shutting out Dom. And then they'd…he cut that thought off.

He dodged the bullet on that one. He was lucky she hadn't gone full fledge into relationship mode. As it was they were still friends. She was still in his life now more than ever since she was living in the cabin. He frowned again. She'd been hinting about moving out. He'd kind of gotten used to her being around. He liked having a hiking buddy who didn't chase after any stray scent or noise. She opened his eyes to the beauty of his home. It had become more than just the place he retreated for solace. He liked knowing she wasn't far away when he went to sleep at night and woke in the morning. He didn't want her to move out. Even with Lee living there he could only think of a cabin without Caitlin as a very lonely place.

~~~AW~~~

"Where have you been?" Caitlin asked Hawke when he finally pulled up to the hangar. "We'll be up half the night decorating for Lee's party."

Hawke looked at his watch. "I'll handle it," he said gruffly. He rolled his motorcycle into the hangar to park. Caitlin followed.

"What do you mean? I don't expect you to decorate by yourself, but, I've still got a cake to bake tonight, unless I take off tomorrow morning."

"I'll tell Dom not to expect you then." He turned away from her.

She put a hand on his arm. "Hey, don't walk away from me. What's going on with you?"

Just then a white limo pulled up in front of the hangar. Hawke's eyes went cold but were glued to the limo.

"Ms. O'Shannessy?" A woman dressed in white held the back door to the limo opened.

"Yeah, what's going on here?"

"I have orders to escort you to dinner."

"But, I…" she started.

Hawke forcibly removed his arm from Cait's grasp. "I guess I forgot to tell you. Archangel has taken a certain _interest_ in you. You'd better not keep the man waiting." He waved at the limo and retreated to far side of the hangar to disappear through the back door to the lockers.

Cait watched him go her jaw dropped in the shock of what Hawke just said. She turned toward the limo.

"There must be some mistake."

"No mistake, Ms. O'Shannessy. Archangel wants you to join him for dinner to discuss the latest news on CC and Chad Carter."

She gave a quick nod to her head. With one last look in the direction Hawke had gone, Caitlin walked to the limo.


	17. Chapter 17

"Hey Cait," Stringfellow Hawke called as he walked down the hall. "Lee wants to go for a hike around the lake. You want ta tag along?"

The smile on his face faded as he stopped at her open bedroom door. There were several opened boxes scattered about the room, a couple sealed with tape and clearly labeled were stacked neatly by the door. Caitlin sat on the edge of her bed folding clothes and putting them into a box.

As she looked up their eyes met. She saw hurt in his before the familiar mask that hid his feelings from the world settled implacably on his features. She gazed back at the clothes so he wouldn't be able to read her.

"You guys should go on." She took a breath and sat up a little straighter. "I've got a lot to do before I move into my new apartment."

She could feel his eyes burning through her as she mechanically folded another shirt and placed it in the box. This wasn't quite how she had intended to break the news to him. But, she realized there probably wouldn't be a 'good' time to do that anyway.

"When?"

The stark word was flung across the room devoid of all inflection. She felt it hit her as if it had been a physical blow and struggled not to jump.

"The apartment will be available to move into at the start of next week."

The two of them had been dancing around the subject of how long she was staying since just before Le's homecoming. That had been more than a month ago and Cait had finally decided that it was time she got back on her own two feet. She loved spending all that time with Le and especially with Hawke, but the truth of it was that it wasn't fair. It wasn't fair to her or to Le. She had heard the boys at school tease him about his 'Aunt' that lived with him when she picked him up from school one day. He said it didn't bother him, but it did bother her. Her relationship with Hawke wasn't going anywhere either. It had seemed harder than ever to get him to notice her as anything more than _good ol Cait, dependable sidekick, always there to lend a hand when needed._ They'd been on the verge of an all-out argument on more than one occasion before String would abruptly drop the subject and leave the room.

"Cait you're still in danger." He spoke with difficulty still searching for an acceptable reason for her to stay. He didn't want to be having this conversation at all_. Didn't she know she was welcome to stay as long as necessary, necessary for you or her?_ He shoved that thought away.

"You know CC won't stop until she gets you. The last time she poisoned you. Next time she might try something a little bit quicker." He let just a tiny bit of the concern he felt creep into his voice.

"It's okay Hawke." She finally met his eyes again. "Michael gave me an apartment in Valhalla. CC won't be able to get within a mile of me with all the people he has living there. I'll be fine."

"You're safe here," he said anger beginning to thread its way through his voice. The words _with me_ stuck in his throat.

"Hawke, you know I love it here. But, I can't be a houseguest forever. I need more than a room to call mine. I need a home. I need…" Her voice faded.

She didn't want to leave. She wanted to stay forever, but not as a houseguest. She was finding it harder and harder to avoid intimacy with Hawke. It was too much of a struggle to hide her feelings to keep from touching him in some small way. She had caught herself watching him and even kissed him a couple of times. The kisses had been on the cheek and easily dismissed by both of them…but the cheek had definitely not been where she had wanted them to be.

"I can't believe you're falling for that." He said with a mixture of anger and irritation.

"Falling for what?" confusion evident in her voice as she stood to face him.

"Valhalla!" he spat. "Michael doesn't let anyone but his Angels stay there. He's probably trying to recruit you so he can get his hands on…" he hesitated, "Airwolf."

"Michael," she said trying to maintain her calm, "only offered me a secure place to stay. He isn't trying to pull a fast one. Besides, I'd never give him Airwolf."

"I've seen him manipulate heads of state into agreeing to things they thought they'd never do too." Hawke's anger rose. "Cait, I'm telling you. He's expecting to get something out of this one way or another. He wouldn't let just anyone stay at Valhalla."

"Well maybe I'm not just anyone, Hawke." The volume of her voice rose to match his. "Just maybe he sees me a little bit differently and wants just as much as you to keep me safe. It's not as if CC doesn't know where the cabin is after all."

He flinched at the reminder of what he'd almost done with CC.

"And have you ever considered that just maybe, Michael, can do it without me having to spend all my evenings hiding out in the woods!"

Caitlin had taken a few steps toward him as she spoke. Her anger flushed her cheeks and fire lit up her eyes.

Hawke's eyes smoldered. He started to take a step toward her as the tension in the room shifted from anger to something hotter burning just beneath the surface.

Caitlin held her breath. The last time she'd seen that particular look in his eyes she'd spent the most incredible night of her life in his arms, and the next morning re-examining her life in California.

"Uncle String," Le called from the living room oblivious to their argument and rampant emotions, "is Cait coming or not?"

Hawke caught himself mid-step, pivoted on his heel, and yelled, "Not," as he walked away.

~~~AW~~~

The elevator doors opened and Hawke started down the hall to Michael's office. He pushed through the outer office door anger radiating off him in waves. He walked straight to the inner door not even bothering to acknowledge the blonde seated at the reception desk.

"You can't go in there Mr. Hawke," Stephanie said. She got rapidly to her feet, skirted the desk, and moved to stop him. She reached him just as he threw open the office door. Hawke shook off the hand she placed on his arm.

Michael looked up from the folder Marella was holding out for him to read. Seeing Hawke his one blue eye warily assessed his adversary. He was immediately on guard, but didn't show a hint of it. He raised an eyebrow at Stephanie standing just behind and to the side of the intruder.

"I'm sorry Sir. I tried to stop him," Stephanie said in apology. If it weren't for his standing orders concerning Hawke she would have too.

"That's quite all right, Stephanie. I've come to expect Mr. Hawke's lack of decorum." He dismissed Stephanie and turned to Marella. "I expect you to monitor the situation and keep me informed."

"Yes Sir," Marella said as she released the file to Michael. "Hawke," she acknowledged on her way out keeping any hint of a smile from her face until after pointedly shutting the door.

"I want some answers, Michael. And, I want them now," Hawke demanded. His eyes were narrowed to slits while a muscle twitched along his jaw.

"Once I know what the question is, I'll see what I can do." He laid the file on the edge of his desk and casually turned to face Hawke.

"Why did you offer to let Cait stay at Valhalla? She's not one of your Angels," Hawke said angrily. "She doesn't need to be subjected to your manipulation."

Michael considered his response while rubbing his mustache. "Hawke you know Valhalla is just an apartment complex. Sure it houses a number of the people in my division when they aren't on assignment, but isn't that a plus?"

"A plus how," Hawke ground out.

"Security," Michael stated succinctly. "The FBI has admitted to loosing Chad Carter. I don't know what surprised them more the fact that he recovered from the coma or that he managed to disappear from the hospital only days later."

Hawke was visibly surprised by this news.

"I take it Caitlin didn't tell you." He sighed before continuing. "She probably didn't tell you that we had reports of CC heading for LA either. The two of you really need to work on your communication skills."

Michael relaxed a little and leaned back on his desk confident of his next move.

"I thought Valhalla was a win, win."

"How do you figure that?" Hawke asked with surprise.

"We all know how you like your solitude, Hawke. It gets Cait out of your way at the cabin while still providing her with the type of protection only _I_ can provide. After all I seem to recall a conversation she and I had about the difficulties of having…a relationship while living under someone else's roof even if he is a close _friend._"

He paused momentarily letting some of the connotations of what he was saying penetrate Hawke's haze of anger.

"She doesn't need your kind of protection. She's not one of your agents, Michael. I won't have her sucked in to your world."

"Thanks in no small part to you she already is part of my world." He paused a moment before continuing. "In case you haven't noticed, Caitlin is an intelligent, beautiful, vibrant _single_ woman. Just because _you_ would rather treat her as the kid sister you never had, doesn't mean she is. I could use someone like her. The rest of the male race isn't so blind to her _obvious_ charms."

"Stay away from Caitlin." Hawke warned.

"Or what Hawke," Michael asked. "You don't seem to think she can make her own decisions. Once she's moved, I'm sure Caitlin will find the benefits of Valhalla to her liking."

Michael missed the shift in Hawke's eyes from cold anger to an inferno of fury. The next thing he knew, he was face down on the plush white carpet in his office. One of these days he was going to learn not to expose his blind side to Hawke's right cross. Michael wiped the drop of blood from his split lip perversely thankful he'd caught it before it had a chance to mar the carpet.

"I swear Michael, if you lay one hand on Cait," Hawke began. His voice went as hard as granite. His right hand was still clenched in a fist. "I'll see to it personally you meet your namesake."

With that Hawke yanked the door open and stormed out.


	18. Chapter 18

Caitlin shut the door on the helicopter she'd just landed and started toward the hangar.

"Everett," she called to the part time mechanic. "She handled just fine. I think you fixed the problem. Can you put her away for me?"

"Sure," he responded absently.

A silver 1981 Corvette pulled up to the hangar. A leggy brunette stepped elegantly out. Her stiletto hills clicked on the tarmac as she made her way over to Caitlin.

Cait put on her best meet the client smile and introduced herself.

"It's nice to meet you Caitlin. You may call me Nadia." She scanned the immediate area. "I was wondering if Mr. Santini were around."

"Well, he and Hawke should be back any minute now. I'm sure I can get you started. What are you interested in charters, stunts, flying lessons? We do it all?"

Nadia smiled with satisfaction. She knew if she tracked down Santini, Hawke wouldn't be far behind.

"Well, I'm sure you can tell me more about Hawke and Santini. I hear they're the best. But, I like to know whom I'm dealing with."

"Sure," Cait conceded. This wasn't the first time a client had dismissed her and asked for them. Usually she would discuss the business in such a way that the client didn't dismiss her thereafter. "If you'll just follow me, we can talk in the office…."

"Oh come on Dom. You know that director was just yanking my chain." Hawke griped as he climbed out of the Santini Air jeep.

He took note of the Corvette, flashy, not new, but well maintained. Studio people usually drove the latest and greatest or were driven. _New client, maybe,_ he thought.

"That didn't mean you had to scare him half to death by cutting the engine and auto-rotating in," Dom griped.

"It got us the job didn't it," Hawke said with a shrug of his shoulders.

"Yeah, the look on his face was worth it too. Boy, String I thought he was going to lose his lunch right there." Dom gave String a friendly swat as he started to laugh. He sobered quickly as he walked through the hangar to the office.

Hawke's gaze assessed the agent. She wasn't wearing white, but that didn't mean that she wasn't here on business.

Nadia stood and greeted them. She quickly focused on Hawke and smiled.

"I hope you'll accept my invitation to dinner? I didn't have time to properly thank you before."

She stepped close to Hawke and invited him to more than dinner with her eyes.

Hawke shifted on his feet and glanced quickly at Caitlin. He thought again about what Michael had said about the possibility that she'd turned and wondered what her end game was. He smiled just a little in encouragement. If he played this right, he would be doing Michael a favor. Or, he could end up with a nice diversion just what he needed to get his mind off Cait.

Caitlin bit her lower lip. During their conversation Nadia had sidestepped every time she'd pressed her about the job. Conversely she had wanted to know everything possible about Hawke. Cait had begun to suspect that her interest was more than business related. Now that her suspicions were confirmed, there wasn't much she could do about it.

"Well, I'm heading over to get Le from school."

Caitlin excused herself quickly noting that Hawke barely shifted his gaze. _Why would he,_ she told herself. _I may still be living under his roof but he's barely spoken to me in the last couple of days._ She was beginning to question her strategy with him. He hadn't asked her to stay when he'd found her packing. In fact all he'd done was imply that he was the only one who could reasonably keep her safe. She didn't want a protector. She wanted…well it didn't seem to matter to Hawke what she wanted since he obviously wouldn't allow himself to want the same thing.

"Ah, I'll walk you out Cait," Dom said following her. He was awkwardly aware of the meaningful look Nadia had given String and if he noticed then Caitlin definitely had.

Dom also saw the way String gazed at Nadia. He noted the quick glance Hawke shot at Caitlin. _Ha! Six months ago the boy wouldn't have done that,_ Dom thought with a measure of satisfaction. To Dom, if not to anyone else, his boy was finally showing his true feelings toward Cait. Caitlin had complained that Hawke hadn't been saying much to her and when he did it was usually snarky. He was also downright ignoring her most of the time. It was all Dom could do not to let on to String that he knew.

"What are you grinning at?" Cait said after retrieving her keys from her purse and looking up. "You know that," she waved her hand in the direction of the office, "isn't a paying client. It's not likely to last more than a night or two either." She couldn't quite keep her frustration out of her voice.

"Oh, I know. She's who we picked up the other night in the Lady. Don't worry Cait." Dom knew he was treading on shaky ground, but he'd seen her frustration. "String's not interested in her."

"I don't know what you're talking about Dom." Cait said despite the blush painting her cheeks. She wasn't sure if they were out of Hawke's earshot. "Hawke has just as much right as _I_ do to pursue the opportunities that come his way."

Dom held the door to Caitlin's car open. She climbed in as he spoke to her through the open window.

"You don't get to be my age without learning a thing or two. String's just trying to…to…adjust to the way things are right now. Just hang on a little while longer. You'll see."

"Whatever Dom," Caitlin dismissed as she started the car.

Her resolve to move out of the cabin solidified. If Hawke was going to fall back into his old patterns, she would have to put more distance between them. Keeping her small hope alive that he might allow himself something more than a one night stand, would not bring her down again. And, as much as she might want to repeat that experience with him, she deserved better than that. _He_ might not think more of her than that but she definitely thought more of herself.

A few minutes later, String saw Nadia to her car. As she drove away, he turned back to Dom.

"Well that was quick, even for you." Dom couldn't suppress the chuckle that escaped.

String wrinkled his brow wondering just what Dom was getting at. "Dom, can you take Le tonight?"

Dom put his hands on his hips and raised his eyebrows in question.

"I've got something to take care of," String finished thoughtfully.

"Oh," he said with multiple meanings packed into the single word. "Do you think you'll need tomorrow off as well?"

"Maybe, I guess I just want to see how tonight goes."

Dom studied the younger man for a moment. He wasn't quite sure what String was thinking. He almost didn't ask his next question, but thought he'd better be prepared before Cait returned.

As casually as possible he asked, "So, should I plan on having to make a trip to the cabin as well or is that part of what you're going to take care of?"

"Nah, if things don't pan out I'll just take my bike, or bunk here."

"What about Cait?" Dom's voice lowered.

"What about her?" was String's annoyed response.

"I thought you said she was still in danger."

"And she's made it perfectly clear she doesn't want my protection." Hawke shot back with increasing volume.

"Kid," Dom started not sure how to continue he finally just plunged ahead. "I'm not sure what's going on in that head of yours, but if you don't start thinking straight about that girl you **will** lose her and not in the way you **think**."

Hawke shot Dom an annoyed look before stalking off.

~~~AW~~~

When Caitlin returned to the hangar with Le in tow, she helped him with his homework. She was going to miss out on a lot of Le's life when she left the cabin for her own place. She had gotten used to being…well not exactly a mom to him. It had been difficult to tell him about her moving out. He'd already lost so many people in his life. She had explained to him that she wasn't leaving because of him. He seemed to understand more about the situation between her and Hawke than she would have thought never mentioning her leaving while Hawke was around. Le'd been very understanding and even joked about it being a way he could have yet another room to call his own. She wondered at his resiliency and wished she could tap some of it for herself.

"Hey half-pint," Hawke came over some time later. He ruffled Le's hair before pouring himself a cup of coffee. "Do you want to stay at Dom's tonight?"

"Do I get to play the Atari?" he asked with enthusiasm.

"You know it's a school night." Hawke admonished.

"Come on Uncle String, Cait's already helped with my homework. All I have left is a little reading." He pleaded.

"Well I don't know." Hawke rubbed his chin but his eyes were twinkling and a smile threatened to break out. "Dom's only got one TV. Maybe he'll want to watch Knots Landing or Hotel."

Le rolled his eyes. They both knew Dom was more likely to want to watch some old John Wayne movie than any prime time soap.

Hawke dropped his hand and grinned. "Okay. But, only if Dom says it's okay."

"Woo hoo!" Le jumped up and hugged his uncle.

Caitlin grinned at the both of them. Hawke happened to look her way. For a moment he held his smile. When she met his eyes, the smile faded and he looked away. She hid her disappointment.

"Dom will take you up to the cabin to get some extra clothes. I'll see you tomorrow."

_What,_ Cait thought as he walked away. _He's not coming home tonight?_

The thought was still in the back of her mind that evening when she headed to the waiting chopper. She was beginning the pre-flight checks when Nadia's corvette pulled up to the hangar. Caitlin frowned as Nadia strolled into the hangar wearing a backless sequined evening gown.

"Hubba hubba Uncle String," Le said as he gathered up his backpack.

Hawke strolled over to Le. He pulled slightly at the sleeve of his white dress shirt before slipping on the black suit coat. He smiled as he caught sight of Nadia entering the hangar.

"Hey half-pint, I'll walk you out." He ruffled Le's hair as they walked past Nadia. He didn't introduce them. "You be good for Dom." He let his gaze settle on the chopper and Cait. She never looked his way.

"You go on Le. I'll be there in a minute." Dom stopped by Hawke. "What do you think you're doing?" He turned on Hawke when the rotors began turning.

"Don't know what you're talking about Dom." Hawke watched as Caitlin helped get Le settled. He frowned. She didn't seem to notice him at all.

Dom's voice rose in anger and so as to be heard over the rotors. "Cait's never stood in your way, but if you don't wise up, she's going to do more than just move out of the cabin."

Hawke's eyes snapped to the older man. "Dom," he warned.

"Ah," Dom said throwing up his arms in frustration. "After this stunt, maybe you deserve it." He turned and left String looking after him with a frown.

Cait took the helicopter up smoothly and turned them toward the cabin.

Nadia stepped up behind him. She placed her hand on his shoulder to get his attention.

"Are you ready?"

He turned slowly away from the retreating helicopter to look into her inviting eyes.

"Yeah, I just need to lock up."

~~AW~~

As the evening wore on Hawke began questioning exactly what he was doing. There was no doubt Nadia was a beautiful, intelligent, and captivating woman. Seeing the looks that were sent their way at the upscale club they had ended up at, told him he was the envy of most men in the room. Six months ago he would have enjoyed the evening. Six months ago he would have been anticipating joining her in her hotel room. But, she was like so many other women he'd been with ever since Gabrielle, jaded by life and love. She was clearly offering a night to forget the outside world and he was tempted…tempted to the point he found himself standing outside her hotel room door as she fumbled with the key.

Opening the door, she turned to him. Nadia slipped her arms around his neck. His went to her waist. She leaned in and they kissed. As kisses went it wasn't bad, but as soon as she tried to deepen it he pulled back. She raised questioning eyes to his.

"Was I mistaken?" She searched his gaze. "I've not misread those signals in a long time."

He sighed not sure how to explain his actions.

"No, you weren't mistaken…I thought…I could do this." He didn't know what else to say. His emotions were in turmoil. He'd been thinking about how Cait had totally ignored him at the airfield earlier. He'd been hurt. He'd been thinking that he needed to spend a little time forgetting his feelings for her. His face revealed nothing of his confusion with his own actions.

"You do find me attractive then?"

He nodded not trusting his own voice. When Nadia kissed him, he'd felt like he was betraying Caitlin. In that moment, he knew being there was a mistake. He knew his feelings for Cait had somehow developed to the point of no return. He finally realized what she had been trying to tell him. He hadn't been ready before. He saw with clarity that he couldn't lose her. Now, he knew what he had to do.

"She must really be something special."

His eyes revealed his shock at her statement. Was it really that clear to everyone but him?

She ran her hand down his neck and placed it on his chest. She gazed at him a little wistfully.

"At least I know I haven't lost my touch. I was beginning to wonder." She kissed him on the cheek before taking a step back from him regret showing in her eyes. "Grab hold of her Hawke. And no matter what don't let her go. Love is rare enough to find in this business. In the end, you'd do almost anything to keep it." She looked at him sadly as she took another step back and reached to close the door.

Hawke turned and headed down the hall.

Nadia watched until the elevator doors closed on him. She found herself hoping he wouldn't be too late.


	19. Chapter 19

Caitlin sighed as she finished wiping dry the last of her dinner dishes. It was the first time she'd had an evening to herself since Le had returned from summer camp. The cabin seemed a bit lonely without the prospect of Hawke coming back that night. She briefly wondered if she should have taken Dom up on his offer. The older man had been uncomfortable with her unnatural silence on the trip up to the cabin. He'd suggested they all just stay at the cabin that night. She'd assured him that she was fine and besides she'd have to be on her own often enough once she moved. Dom had reluctantly conceded.

She shook off the sudden melancholy.

_Since when did she, Caitlin O'Shannessy have to have Hawke around to feel fulfilled?_ She thought. _Since you knew you were in love with him, silly._

She shook her head at herself. It was time to face the facts. She had to move on. Pushing past the voice in her head that said _yeah fat chance_, Caitlin moved resolutely to the stereo. She set the needle down on the record cautiously before heading over to Hawke's sofa. She absently patted Tet, Hawke's dog, as she passed the chair he'd taken up residence in.

She stretched out to finish the book she'd been reading. She would be moving to her own apartment in the next few days and didn't feel comfortable taking the rare first printing with her.

Something outside interrupted the yawn Tet was in the middle of. His head jerked to the front door. Shortly he was running out and Cait absently wondered if a rabbit had wandered too close to the cabin.

The rain that had been threatening all afternoon finally burst forth in a sudden shower. "Great," she muttered to herself. "Be prepared for the smell of wet dog."

The ice shifted in the glass of tea she'd placed on the coffee table earlier. The sound reminded her of its presence and she sat the book on the cushion next to her before moving to retrieve it. She took a long sip of the sun tea, savoring the brew.

Hawke had looked at her skeptically the first time she'd put a large jar of water complete with tea bags out on the front porch to be brewed by the sun. After tasting the 'naturally' brewed tea, he had taken to drinking more of it than she did. The end result being it was usually gone before she got to enjoy more than one glass.

She was just returning the glass to the table when movement beyond the large front windows caught her attention. Caitlin recognized the slim figure dressed in black immediately. She thought furiously. She had no time to get to the gun hidden behind the bar, no time to do much of anything before CC Carter stepped through the front door of the cabin.

"Caitlin, don't you look cozy. Ah, but where is Hawke?" CC said as if she already knew the answer. The next words from her mouth confirmed that she did. "All moved in and he still prefers the company of another woman. When will you ever learn, Cait? You just don't have what it takes to keep a real man."

"That's always been your problem CC," Cait paused a moment.

If she could get CC to move a little closer, she may have a chance to knock the gun from her hand without getting shot in the process. Caitlin slowly rose from her position and skirted around the couch. Her mind quickly assessed the likely hood of escape, considering and discarding options.

"I don't _need_ to keep any man. You should know that better than most. Besides no matter what, we both know you and Hawke will never happen."

CC's brown eyes flashed in anger. She had wanted Caitlin to be jealous of her. She had initially pursued Hawke to that end, but plans had a way of changing.

"Perhaps, but you're not going to be here to find out. I thought we'd go for a little walk," CC said as she trained the gun she was holding on Cait.

CC motioned her out the door keeping a careful distance between them. She remembered Cait's martial arts training and didn't plan to get close enough for it to be a factor. She directed Caitlin to take a path leading away from the cabin. Before long the cabin was out of sight, the path narrowed, and became decidedly steeper. Cait had to concentrate on her footing as she traversed the rain slickened path. She perversely wished she could have at least grabbed a jacket.

~~~AW~~~

Hawke pushed the Hughes 500D close to its 152 knots maximum speed. Once he'd made the decision to open up to Cait it seemed he couldn't do it fast enough. The drive to get everything out preferably before he lost his nerve or talked himself out of it had grown with each passing minute. It had settled like an itch between his shoulders that wouldn't go away. He had to see Caitlin.

The rain that had been threatening was beginning to pelt the windshield, an annoyance to get through. The wind had picked up and buffeted the chopper from side to side. He wasn't sure if it was trying to hinder him or urge him on to his destination. His anxiety grew with each passing minute.

Hawke finally breathed a sigh of relief as he rounded the last bluff and arrowed in on the landing dock. He barely waited for the engine to power down before he was striding up the path to the cabin.

Hawke flung the door opened and scanned the room. His face immediately looking as it had more than two years prior when he'd arrived home to find his art collection missing. Something was wrong. He could feel it. Without looking he knew that Cait wasn't in the cabin. Yet the stereo was just finishing playing a record that had to have been started only minutes before and there was half a glass of iced tea sitting on the coffee table a condensation ring only just beginning to form around its base.

Hawke crossed over to the sofa and frowned as he picked up the book lying upside down on its cushions. An avid reader Cait never left books in such a way. She didn't want to bend their spine. As he lifted the book Caitlin's marker was left behind. He reached to pick it up and froze at the two crescent shaped tea stains. Dropping the book he ran for the door his only thought a fervent hope that he wasn't already too late.

~~~AW~~~

"That's far enough." CC called as Cait was about to take a turn in the trail that led away from the cliffs and the lake.

"So what's your plan CC?" Caitlin turned to face the other woman. "Why bring me all the way out here if you're just going to shoot me? You could have done that back at the cabin. Besides, I thought that wasn't your style, too impersonal. Poisoning is more your forte."

Caitlin had to buy time. She thought she'd heard a chopper earlier and had to hope it was Dom changing his mind about leaving her alone for the evening.

"I must admit I'll miss watching you slowly waist away suffering a small portion of the pain you've caused me and Chad. I simply don't have the luxury of the time that would take. Now, if you'll just step over to the left about ten feet your part in this chapter will come to an end."

Caitlin looked to her left. She could see the water pooling at the edge of the path and cascading over taking bits of soil along for the ride. She swallowed hard. There was quite a drop to the inky lake below.

"Why the rush, don't you like to enjoy your work? Isn't that why you left the bodies where you could revisit them?" Cait asked as she stepped slowly to the left looking for any opportunity for escape.

"They were only a poor substitute those men. They had wanted me; but, I'm better than they were. You on the other hand have kept me from what I want. You made Carl want you with that down home girl next door act," she said in disgust. "Then you sent Chad to that horrible place. I never want you coming between us again. I admit your prolonged suffering had been my original goal, but, this isn't about just you anymore little Caitlin," she sneered. "It's about Hawke too. He'll pay for what he did to my darling Chad. He's not himself anymore. But, he will be. You see we've done a little research since our last encounter. You'll simply disappear just like Hawke's brother. He will never know what happened to you. First you, then I'll kill that half-breed brat of a nephew of his. Maybe I'll make it look like a drive by shooting. I hear those are on the rise in LA. Finally it will be Hawke's turn. I wanted to do it myself," she said nonchalantly. "But, I'll leave that pleasure to my brother. He deserves to watch Hawke broken after what he did. And the irony is that Hawke will never see it coming…until it's too late."

"You're sick CC. Carl never wanted you. You knew that and that's why you sent Chad after me." Caitlin knew she hit on the truth when CC took an angry step toward her. "Chad's your own brother, for god's sake. You talk about him as if he were some kind of lover. What kind of psycho are you anyway," Caitlin taunted hoping CC would drop her guard.

"Carl did want me," CC said waving the gun and stepping forward. We'd have been together if it hadn't of been for you." Her voice rose in anger. "Chad needs me. You have no idea what being locked up in that place did to him. He barely survived without me looking out for him."

Caitlin judged the distance between her and CC. She twisted around swiftly kicking the gun from CC's hand. The mud she stood in threw off her momentum and she dropped to the ground.

The blow was enough to throw the other woman into a rage. She screamed and lunged for Cait. They both ended up scrabbling on the ground. The two women had to scratch their way free of e each other and the mud.

Hawke heard a scream on the trail ahead of him and quickened his already dangerously rushed pace.

CC's hand closed around the gun as she stood and turned on Cait. Caitlin was too close. She brought the gun down hard on Cait's temple dazing her. Cait fought through the sudden fog that threatened to engulf her. She grabbed ahold of the hand that held the gun and slammed it across her knee until CC lost her grip. The gun fell again to the muddy ground.

The continuing rain made the rocks along the path slick. Hawke inevitably slipped and lost his footing. Trying to recover, he burst stumbling from the trees to see CC and Caitlin covered in mud each trying desperately to gain the upper hand.

Cait hit the other woman soundly in the ribs and blocked a blow from the left. She caught the movement at the edge of the trail and was momentarily distracted by Hawke's arrival. The moment of inattention was enough for CC to ram into Cait. The water logged soil at the edge of the cliff began to fall away in clumps. A moment later, Hawke watched in horror as the ground gave way beneath their feet. Both women plunged over the side of the cliff and disappeared from sight.

"Caitlin!" Hawke dropped to his knees oblivious of the mud sucking at his dress shoes. Unbidden tears streamed down his face. "No," he sobbed. He hung his head and slammed his fist into the ground. "No." 


	20. Chapter 20

Chapter 20

Fat droplets of water fell in a steady stream from the fringe on his forehead. Stringfellow Hawke didn't notice, his eyes shut tightly against the tears he didn't want to let fall. Tears that he told himself he'd never have to shed again after Gabrielle, tears of anguish and love lost.

His clothes were sodden from the rain and mud sucked at his knees. His hands were buried up to the wrist in that same inky sludge, but he felt none of it. His world had come to a crashing halt. It was as if a chasm had opened up, pulled him under, and closed again without disturbing the surface.

Time meant nothing and the minutes passed without regard. What did it matter anymore? Why was he still living, breathing?

Eyes the color of the summer sky during a drought snapped open. They were devoid of any spark any life. Slowly something began to creep into them. At the edges something dark and icy began to take over until at last, the transformation was complete. He was empty inside. Only a shell was left. He'd lost too many over the years, too much. In a wild frenzy, he decided he would just sell everything, take the money, and spend the rest of his life in Vietnam finding his brother or die trying.

A faint sound teased the edge of his hearing. It pulled him inch by painful inch back from the pit of his despair. He must be crazy. He thought he heard a moan it's what made him open his eyes to begin with. He listened intently. "Oh…," there it was again, faint but definitely a moan. He crawled over to the edge of the cliff taking several deep breaths before he could force himself to look. When he finally peered over the edge, he was jolted into total awareness as relief and fear shot thorough him in equal measure.

By some miracle, Caitlin lay precariously on a thin slab of rock jutting out from the face of the cliff. Spray from the small torrent flowing where the side of the hill used to be splashed all around her. One hand was feebly trying to shield her face.

"Caitlin?" Hawke called trying to get her attention. "Cait?"

"Hmm?" she questioned disoriented. She started to try to move only to freeze at his warning.

"No! Don't move!" Hawke called desperately afraid her slightest movement would cause her to slide from the slippery rock.

He inched forward only to scrabble back as more of the ground gave way. He had to find a way to reach her. Thinking furiously he tore off his belt and fed the end through the buckle creating a cinch strap. It wasn't much but it was all he had at hand and he didn't want to risk her falling while he raced back to the cabin to get a proper rope. He wrapped the loose end of the belt around his one hand. He flattened himself on the ground and lowered the loop toward Cait.

"Cait, Caitlin?"

"Hawke?" she questioned feebly.

She seemed out of it. He needed her to focus if only for a minute. He wouldn't be able to get her off the ledge without her help.

"Caitlin honey, I need you to grab the belt."

"Wha…?" Her hand flailed around responding to the order her brain couldn't make sense of.

"Just a little higher honey…to the left, that's it," he encouraged. Finally her hand found the belt. She slid her hand through the loop and Hawke pulled on it tightening its hold.

"Okay Baby, try to push yourself up a little." He tightened his own grip on the belt.

Cait's first attempt had her hand slide out from under her. Her shoulder thudded painfully against the unyielding rock.

"Caitlin, hang on!" Hawke had never felt so helpless. All he could do to help is hold onto his end of the belt hoping it would be enough to keep Caitlin from falling further.

Cait's second attempt met with more success and soon she was partially up.

Hawke reached to her with his free hand. As he did the ground beneath him began to shift. He hastily withdrew the motion. Calling to Cait and pulling on the belt he inched his way back to more stable ground slowly.

What seemed like a lifetime passed before he finally saw her mud covered hand above the edge. He held his breath. She had to make it just a little farther before he could grab hold and make sure she was safe.

Clutching the end of the belt cutting deeply into her wrist Caitlin pushed herself along the sound of Hawke's voice the only thing that matter in the world. Acting on instinct she grabbed at the mud clawing out great globs in her fight to reach the top of the slope. Finally finding an exposed root to help her along, she pushed her way over the rim.

Hawke let out the breath he'd been holding when she finally appeared above the slope. He pulled her to him and wrapped her in a tight embrace. He buried his head in the hair at her neck and for once did nothing to prevent the tears from falling.

After some time, he drew back and started to kiss her. He stopped just short of her lips. She was shaking and not from being held by him. She also had a dilated vacant look in her eyes.

"Cait?" he asked gently. He searched the blue-green eyes for any sign of recognition. He saw a dim flicker. _Shock_, he concluded.

He gathered her up to a standing embrace and started them down the path back to the cabin.

Caitlin moved woodenly taking halting steps. She leaned heavily on him. The only thing keeping her on her feet was the arm around her waist.

Hawke gazed at her worriedly. He'd seen shock like this before in Vietnam. Sometimes it lasted only a couple of hours, sometimes days, and in a few cases…Well he hoped Caitlin would come out of it quickly. He couldn't bare it if the spark in her had gone out for good.

He risked a hand on her head and noted the way she flinched away from his touch. She must have hit pretty hard on that ledge, probably had a concussion too. She needed to get warm and dry.

Their progress was slow and it took some time for them to reach the warmth and safety of home.

Seemingly frozen at the foot of the stairs, unable or unwilling to move, Caitlin stared off into nothingness. He tried to get her to go up on her own. She wouldn't budge. Whatever ember that had compelled her to follow him that far was now gone. Hawke hesitated for only a moment before gathering her up and carrying her upstairs. He sat her down gently by his bedroom door then guided her through the room to the bathroom.

She stood at a loss on the tile floor while Hawke started a warm bath. He guided her over to the edge and helped her off with her shoes and socks.

"You need to get warmed up," he said gently while indicating the filling tub.

Caitlin stood there in a daze. She didn't seem to register his words, didn't know what was expected of her.

Hawke hesitantly reached for the buttons on her shirt. He carefully undid the first one. He drew in a deep breath and started on the second.

Something clicked behind the unfocused eyes and Caitlin began to unbutton the rest of her blouse.

Realizing she was about to undress in front of him, Hawke hastily exited the room closing the door behind him. He rested an ear to the door and sighed when he heard her turn off the water and climb into the tub.

Hawke looked down at the mud tracked across the floor. He had a lot of work to do before she was done with her bath. First, he grabbed a clean pair of jeans and headed for the downstairs bathroom in the new addition. After a much needed but quick shower, he set some soup on the hopper to warm then began to clean up.

~~AW~~

Awareness slammed through Cait like a freight train. Every place she'd banged or bruised in her most recent peril ached with a ferocity she didn't think possible. What was worse was her complete lack of memory as to how she had ended up in a warm bath. She had to be in the cabin. The split log walls were a dead giveaway and the cabin was the last thing she could remember clearly.

As the warmth of the water started to ease some of the pain, she began to take a proper bath and wash her hair. She catalogued her injuries along the way mostly scrapes and bruises. She found a nasty bump on her head and delicately cleaned it. When she was done she pulled the plug and grabbed a towel from the shelf above her.

Stepping from the tub, she looked around the bathroom. Cait saw the heap of muddy clothes next to the tub and absently noted that they belonged to her. She liked the black and brown tile of the floor. It provided a nice contrast to the white porcelain antique fixtures. Her gaze moved to the fogged over vanity mirror. She recognized the etchings around its rim. It had hung in Hawke's bathroom before the cabin extension.

She was still thinking about that when the door opened a crack. She was mildly surprised to see some clothes appear. Attached to them was a lean muscular arm, Hawke's arm. Eventually the back of his shoulder appeared. The outstretched arm dropped the clothes on the top of the wicker hamper by the door before it disappeared from view. The door snicked shut a moment later.

She smiled. However she may have ended up in this situation she should have known Hawke would be there taking care of her. He always did. And, he always would as long as she would let him. The thought warmed her.

She stepped over to the hamper. Cait started to wrap the towel carefully around her head. Finding she couldn't avoid the lump that seemed to be growing there, she patted it dry as much as possible. Dropping the towel to the floor without regard, she pulled on one of her own sleep shirts and a pair of shorts. Hawke must have retrieved them from her bedroom.

She opened the door and took two steps into the room beyond.

Hawke was just coming through the door on the other side. He was carrying a tray laden with a bowl of soup and a mug of hot chocolate. He froze when he saw her.

The vacant look in her eyes was gone but she was incredibly pale. A memory of CC screaming and rushing toward her, toward the edge of the cliff flashed through her consciousness. She swayed on her feet.

Hawke set the tray hastily on the bedside table before taking the few steps that separated them.

Her arms went around him quickly and she started shaking once more. Tears began to fall dampening the shoulder beneath.

"Hey, it's okay. You're going to be okay. You're safe now." Hawke stroked her back while trying to comfort her with his words. He knew the tears would help get her past the shock almost as much as the bath. "I'm here. I won't let anything happen to you."

She held onto him tightly for several minutes as his presence and soft spoken words calmed her. When she could finally release him enough to swipe at the moisture on her face, he guided her over to the bed. He tucked her under the covers. Cait shook her head with a wince of pain when he offered the soup and hot chocolate. He had turned to leave when she spoke for the first time since falling.

"Hold me."

The words were so quiet only Hawke could have heard them and even he almost missed them. He turned back in an instant searching her face. He saw the plea and something that looked like fear in her eyes.

He crossed quickly to the bed.

Hawke lay on top of the covers. He put an arm around her and tucked her closer to his side. He gently stroked the arm she slung around him with his other hand. He kissed her hair lightly as she settled in.

Caitlin snuggled into him. She laid her head on his chest placing her ear over his heart. Holding on to him drove away the residual fear from her encounter. She finally felt safe. Exhausted, she closed her eyes and was asleep mere moments later.

~~~AW~~~

Caitlin opened her eyes slowly. She didn't recognize the roof over her head. It looked like the cabin but not part she'd been in before. She turned over on her side and came to a stunned halt. A painting she'd only seen in an art book was hanging on the wall. She knew up until recently it had been in a museum. She'd commented on the news when she heard it had been purchased by an anonymous collector. She'd always wanted to see it in person. It was one of her favorite works of art. The other things in the room told her she was in Hawke's room in his bed. Slowly some of the events of the previous night came back to her. After her encounter with CC, Hawke had taken care of her, walked her back to the cabin, and later held her until she fell asleep.

She sat up in bed and reached for the bowl of soup on the bedside table. It was cold, but she took a sip of it anyway before setting it back on the table. Her eyes drifted to the painting. She knew from the newspaper report that he'd paid over $2 million for it. She wondered why he'd never said anything to her knowing how much she loved the painting. She looked over at the bathroom door as she heard it open.

Blue eyes collided with hers. Hawke stood there a moment before he walked into the room still wearing the pair of jeans he'd slept in. His hair was a little damp and clung to his forehead. He sat on the bed and looked at her with concern. His blue eyes were soft and tender. After a few moments he reached out and tucked an errant wisp of red hair behind her ear. She caught the faint scent of his aftershave as his hand lingered on her cheek before it dropped away.

"Are you okay?" His voice was thick with emotion asking so much with so few words.

"Yeah, I think so." She gave him a weak smile tried and failed to sustain it for long.

"You want to talk about it?"

She shook her head and regretted the motion. "I really don't remember much. I guess I came to in the tub, but I don't remember how I got there."

"Shock…You fell off the side of a cliff," he said roughly. He took a deep breath before continuing. "I had to pull you up with just my belt. That's why your wrist is bruised."

She looked down in surprise at her wrists for the first time noticing the ligature mark from where the belt had cinched around one of them. She had a flash of memory, the fear and desperation in Hawke's eyes and voice as he begged her to hang on.

"I scared you," she stated as she gazed back up at him.

He looked away not able to meet her compassionate gaze. After a long moment he said, "I thought you were going to die. When I saw you fall…I thought you had."

She reached over and put her hand on his.

He flipped it over to entwine their fingers. He held on and closed his eyes on the memory. He willed himself to take regular breaths to calm the pounding in his heart. _She's okay,_ he reminded himself. _She's safe. She's here but, for how long?_ He wasn't sure he wanted to face the answer to that question.

"I love you," she said.

Hawke's eyes snapped open at the quiet words and froze accusingly on the speaker. He was unable to hide the fear her words invoked. He'd known. At least he'd hoped, well not exactly hoped she felt that way; but he had hoped that she would realize the consequences and…well, he hadn't wanted her to leave. He'd just wanted her to be safe. He wanted to protect her from his curse. He didn't want to lose her.

"You can't. I know that," she continued calmly. "You've been through so much. But, you have to know that my feelings aren't changing just because of what might happen. I don't want to leave, but the status quo isn't working and…damn it I won't stay as a houseguest."

She was the one to look away this time irritated for losing her temper. They sat there for a long time in silence. They were both oddly comforted by the simple contact their joined hands gave.

He'd always been impressed by her bravery, especially when the odds were against them. She held a steadfast faith that things would work out. Her unyielding support was one of the things he loved about her. She was right. The status quo wasn't working.

He knew how he felt. The one night they'd spent together had haunted him since. He struggled with what he wanted and what could happen if he went down that road. He thought he had made his decision on his date the night before, but then…She had been in danger and barely made it out this time. What if she didn't make it next time? What then? He'd been denied so much for so long. He hoped against hope that she would finally be the one to break his curse. She had survived so much since they met. Attempted rape, hijacking, kidnapping, and poisoning hadn't driven her away, but she was no longer happy with just friendship. Her feelings were already there, out in the open, come what may. She had taken the first brave step. She was waiting. Now, it was his turn, his choice.

"Don't leave." He said quietly, unable to say more.

She dared to look back at him trying to see beneath the turmoil in his eyes. Fear was still there but they were also pleading with her.

His hand tightened in hers. The words he wanted to say were stuck in his throat. He had been there for her this time. He shouldn't tempt fate. He should let her go. Deep down, Hawke was worried that she would do more than leave the cabin for the apartment at Valhalla. He thought she might finally leave for good. Part of him was telling him he should let her go as the only way to be sure of her safety. Another part was screaming at him to lay all his cards on the table and hold nothing back.

"Stay…here." The words he forced out were almost inaudible. He dropped his gaze to stare at the hand he held. His chest tightened on the breath he took. He willed himself to breathe out normally

She realized he wasn't just asking her to stay at the cabin, but to stay, with him. And, she understood what that admission meant for him. He couldn't go beyond that for now. It was a struggle to admit to that much almost like he was tempting fate if he were to say more. As much as she would have liked to hear the words, she knew it would be a long time in coming, if ever.

Ever since they'd met, he'd been there for her, helping her. Their friendship had been fast and easy. It had a rightness to it that neither had questioned. She had slowly fallen in love with him. Every time she had hit one of his walls, every time she was tempted to leave something would happen to make her love him that much more. Slowly he'd trusted her with more and more of his life, giving her just a little bit more to hang onto. Her gaze flicked to the painting on the wall bought months ago and she thought of the one in her room downstairs. She remembered a hundred other things he did for her without ever calling attention to it. She realized it didn't matter if he said the words. He'd already shown her how he felt, even if she hadn't recognized it hidden as it was behind the safety of friendship. Hawke had kept her at arm's length while cementing her place with him, pushed her away only to draw her closer. He'd acted out of his fear of losing her. He'd not only been trying to protect her but himself as well.

She reached up and palmed his cheek forcing their eyes to meet. Then slid her hand to the back of his neck and pulled him to her. Their lips met in a tender kiss of promise.


	21. Chapter 21

Sorry, it has taken me so long to post chapters. I tend to write long hand and then have to find time to enter it all in the computer. I thought about making this a two part installment story where chapter 20 ended the first part. But, then I decided to just post as I had the time. Thank you all for reading and again sorry for the delay in chapter postings.

Chapter 21

Stringfellow Hawke felt himself grinning as he scrambled eggs for his and Caitlin's breakfast. It felt a little unnatural, but, he couldn't help himself. Caitlin wasn't going to leave. She was staying, staying at the cabin, staying with him. He transferred the eggs to a plate and dumped the cast iron skillet into the sink.

Hawke gripped the counter with white knuckles as the full force of that thought hit him.

Caitlin was staying _with_ him.

His thoughts cast back to earlier when he'd asked her to stay. They'd kissed and he'd lost himself for a few moments. Who was he kidding? He'd lost when he first met her. Maybe even before that when he'd first seen her. He had been so impressed by the fire and fight in her despite the odds of three other cowboys in the back of a pickup. Now that he thought about it, the fact that she went up against that sheriff without any backup probably just sealed the deal. He should have known he was in trouble when she'd tracked him down in Van Nuys. He had convinced himself that she was too young or he was too old and she couldn't possibly be interested in him. After all, it was Airwolf that she kept hounding him about. And, to his credit she had started dating someone else practically right after she arrived.

None of that mattered now. He reluctantly clamped down on his emotions, the hope that threatened to engulf him and pull him under. What was wrong with him anyway? One kiss from Caitlin and he wanted to throw caution to the wind, wanted to show her exactly how much he loved her. One kiss and he'd been hooked without even knowing it.

Hawke had ignored the disappointment that was clearly on her face when he pulled back and told her he'd make breakfast while she got dressed. He'd grabbed a shirt and fled the room quickly. He'd even pretended he didn't notice when she descended the stairs, made her way past the bar, and slipped through the door that led to the new addition.

Slowly Hawke had unlocked that special place where he kept his feelings for Caitlin hidden. He had tried to look at it objectively. But, knowing that she loved him, truly loved him, and wasn't afraid of the very real consequences that came from that had him smiling all over again.

If he could just have a little time to…adjust. Maybe he could get a handle on it. Maybe he could figure out how to live with the constant worry over the repercussions. Maybe, with her help, he could begin to love Caitlin like she deserved.

A plan began to form. Hawke set the plate of eggs on the table as he crossed over to the cabinets that held the radio and satellite phone. He had a few calls to make.

By the time Caitlin reemerged into the main living space of the cabin, Hawke had set the table placing them close together at one end and was just finishing washing the dishes from cooking.

Caitlin tugged a little self-consciously at her sweater. It was a little snug and not her usual style. She'd bought it months ago as one more attempt to get him to notice her, but had never had the courage to wear it. Paired with an old pair of jeans that had molded themselves to her body over time, she hoped his withdrawal from earlier would only be a temporary set-back. She smiled broadly at the cozy table and graciously accepted the chair Hawke helped her into before taking his own.

They ate in silence each darting shy glances at the other. Finally with the meal over, Caitlin began to clear the table.

"Let me do that," Hawke said deftly liberating her plate from her grasp. He dumped it and the rest of the dishes in the sink and started washing.

Feeling like he was trying to avoid her again, Caitlin simply grabbed a towel and began drying.

"You know I thought Dom would be here by now," Caitlin said as she placed the last plate in the cabinet. "Last night he said he wanted to get an early start."

"Well…I kind of called him and…he isn't coming," Hawke replied. He crossed over to the hearth and placed another log on the fire.

"What? Why not? There's a lot of work to do before the weekend." Cait watched him go.

"I told him what happened last night with CC." His shoulders tensed at the thought of almost loosing her. "I thought you needed some time to recover and he agreed. He's looking after Le until the weekend." Hawke avoided her gaze.

"Hawke I'm fine. I don't need two days to recover. I came through it okay. Besides it's over now. CC's gone. I don't have to worry anymore."

She crossed over to the fire and put a hand on his arm. He seemed troubled.

Hawke stood a moment staring into the flames.

"Maybe, I need the time." He admitted softly.

Her hand tightened on his arm and he turned to her. His arms went around her tightening uncomfortably before they relaxed and just held her.

"Cait…" he began his voice rough with emotion.

She placed a finger to his lips. "Don't," she said seeing the turmoil in his eyes. "Don't you dare pull back from this, us. I've let you call the shots long enough. It's time you know I'm not satisfied with just being friends no matter how close. Now, you asked me to stay and I will. As long as I'm able I will, but things are gonna happen. There may come a time when I get hurt."

Hawke closed his eyes and clenched his jaw. He couldn't look into her bright honest eyes as she made him face his demons. He was ashamed of the fear he knew she'd see.

"I may even die, Hawke," she said bluntly.

He flinched in her arms but continued to hold her.

"The same could happen to you." She softened her tone before continuing. "None of that means I won't take that risk. I don't want to give my heart and dream of a future and then be left alone again. I think you're worth it."

She ducked her head under his to see his face. She smiled as he opened his eyes.

He'd forgotten her own struggles with love. She'd just become engaged when her fiancé, Carl had simply disappeared. They knew now that he'd been murdered, but for years she'd been left without knowing. Even after Caitlin made the move to California, she hadn't had much luck in love. He'd had to kill two of the men she'd been interested in himself.

"Truce?" he asked.

"Not on your life mister. I plan on fighting for you." She said with a grin.

"I don't think I'd win," he said his own lips twitching. "You fight dirty." He glanced down at her sweater. He let his hand drift down her back to rest just below her waist.

"You know since Dom isn't coming. We have two days to…adjust to us," he said suggestively.

She brushed his hair from his eyes before resting her arms around his neck.

"Well, all my stuff is in boxes. I guess you could carry them upstairs for me," she teased.

Hawke kissed her until they were both breathless. When they pulled apart she could see mischief in his eyes.

"I think I'll start with you."

~~~AW~~~

Hawke made his way down the stairs with barely concealed annoyance. Dom would be arriving in just a couple of hours and he had wanted to make the most of the time he had left alone with Caitlin. He should have known Michael would find the most inconvenient time to show up. Another five minutes and…well he wouldn't be beating Archangel to the door. He flung it open just as Michael stepped onto the porch.

"Hawke," Michael said noting the younger man's irritation. He suppressed the grin that twitched at his lips. "I didn't catch you at a bad time did I?"

"With you Michael, anytime is bad."

Hawke stood in the doorway trying to prevent the spy from entering. If he could keep him on the porch, maybe he could get rid of him quickly.

Michael blatantly looked past Hawke to the interior of the cabin.

"Looking for something?" Hawke moved just enough to block the view.

Michael let a small smile curve the edge of his mouth. He leaned forward on his cane slightly as if to test Hawke's blockade.

Casually he said, "I actually came to see Caitlin. Do you happen to know if she's up yet? My sources say she hasn't started moving her things to the apartment I arranged yet. Since I was in the neighborhood, I thought I'd offer her a hand."

Caitlin started down the stairs.

"You're never just 'in the neighborhood.'"

"Ah, Cait," Michael said as he elbowed his way past Hawke. He used the briefcase he carried for leverage. "Just the woman I wanted to see."

"You want some coffee?" She asked as she poured herself one.

"I'd love one." Michael took a stool at the breakfast bar dropping the briefcase to the counter. He removed his white Panama hat and laid it carefully to the side.

"Sure, make yourself at home. You will anyway," Hawke grumbled past him.

Cait smiled and handed first Michael and then Hawke a cup of coffee.

Michael took one sip then sat it down.

"I thought you might want an update."

"Well, don't keep us in suspense."

"Aren't you friendly this morning?"

"Oh don't mind him," Caitlin waved in Hawke's direction. "He just doesn't like unexpected interruptions."

Hawke glared at her.

Michael raised an eyebrow. He cleared his throat.

"We've found CC's body," he said.

Caitlin let out a sigh of relief. She visibly relaxed.

"Thank god."

"My sentiments exactly, that's at least one Carter you no longer have to worry about."

Michael took another sip of coffee deliberately drawing out the pause in conversation.

"I hear a, but, Michael," Hawke questioned.

Cait's worried eyes settled on the spy.

"But…" he continued. "Chad is still out there."

"Yeah, but isn't he recovering from a coma?" Cait said. "I mean you don't just bounce right back from something like that…and…and won't he need surgery? I mean how likely is it, really that he'll be in any condition to…" She let her words fade in uncertainty.

Michael sighed wishing he could reassure her. He reached to unlatch the case and pulled out a painfully thin file.

"It seems he's already had reconstructive surgery. From what we've been able to determine so far, he has made remarkable progress with physical therapy as well."

He laid the file on the bar and closed the case. Michael rose from his chair and retrieved his hat.

"If you know all that," Hawke gestured at the file, "why don't you bring him in already and be done with it?"

"Because, Hawke despite the former Senator from Texas' legal difficulties, he still has considerable resources with which to aide his less than stellar offspring." Michael picked up his briefcase and headed for the door.

"I know you're doing what you can," Cait said. "Thanks Michael."

The white clad spy halted at the door and turned back. He gave her a short nod in acknowledgement then glanced at Hawke.

"If you get tired of the rustic cabin in the woods, Cait let me know." He openly grinned, "Your luxury apartment will be waiting."

Michael strolled from the cabin with satisfaction at the glower left on Hawke's face.


	22. Chapter 22

Michael Cold-Smith Briggs III better known around the world as Archangel, stared intently at the file that just crossed his desk. It was no secret in the intelligence community that Archangel had been spending considerable resources trying to find one St. John Hawke. Therefore any connection however tenuous was carefully scrutinized and pursued to its inevitable dead end.

Sometimes the information was an elaborate trap to lure Hawke and Airwolf, at others it was downright false, and on the few rare occasions when it had actually been legitimate, it had turned out to be too old to do any good. Archangel had no reason to suspect the information in this file to bear any other result than the hundreds of previous files. However, once he read its contents, he knew Hawke would want to know. Even if it might lose him the only link he thought he had to his long lost brother.

He pressed the intercom button on his desk with dispassion.

"Lauren," he commanded. "Find the whereabouts of Stringfellow Hawke and ready transportation. I'm going to pay him a visit."

"Yes Sir," came the quick reply.

He crossed over to the liquor cabinet and poured himself a tumbler of bourbon. He'd just finished it as Lauren opened the door.

"If you're ready Sir, the chopper's waiting. Hawke's at his cabin."

"Thank you, Lauren."

Lauren helped him shrug into his suit coat and handed him his cane.

"Bring the file," he told Lauren when he was halfway to the office door.

"Do you think that's wise, Sir?"

Archangel stopped in his tracks and turned around. Lauren had taken her new role as his chief aide very seriously. So seriously in fact that he missed the witty, questioning, and sometimes acerbic comments Marella had made. He'd complained to Marella recently over dinner that he missed her input.

"Be careful what you wish for, Michael," she'd warned him.

He had a feeling that Marella had encouraged Lauren to speak up. He raised an eyebrow in question.

"It's just…well…don't you think we should follow up with this woman before you inform Hawke?"

"We **are** following up. And yes, I wish we had all the answers before informing Hawke. But, I know how he'll react if he gets this information without me telling him first. He has to believe I'm trying. He won't if he keeps getting leads before me. Besides, look what happened with Moore, and McBride, not to mention Taggart. At least if the information comes from me first, I have a chance at damage control."

"Of course Sir," Lauren acknowledged. "We all know how well Hawke follows your lead."

Archangel narrowed his gaze on Lauren. Input was one thing, but this bordered on insolence.

_Definitely Marella's doing,_ he thought as he strolled from the office already reconsidering his decision.

~~~AW~~~

"I'm fine," Stringfellow Hawke told his girlfriend of almost three months.

He and Caitlin O'Shannessy had finally settled into their relationship of more than just friends. The first couple of months had been fraught with misunderstandings. Most of them caused by Hawke himself, he mused. Thankfully Caitlin understood.

She said she'd fight for him, she didn't say she'd fight with him. But fight she had. At first it was his withdrawal whenever they were away from the cabin, after much discussion against his will, she got him to admit that it was due to his fear of losing her. If he could keep their relationship from the outside world, then maybe it would keep her safe. She'd logically pointed out that that thinking was what led both of them to hook up with other people and subsequently put everyone in danger.

The holidays had presented another problem. Caitlin's family had understandably wanted to meet him. He was less than thrilled with that prospect. Le on the other hand couldn't wait to meet his new extended family, Cait's family. It was a consequence of their relationship he hadn't been prepared for, a whole new family. Luckily an Airwolf mission got him out of Thanksgiving and Caitlin insisted on spending Christmas and New Years at the cabin.

Airwolf was another point of contention. Hawke wanted, no needed for Caitlin to be safe. In his mind that meant safe at the cabin while he and Dom handled Michael's missions, she once again used logic to defeat him. She reminded him how well that worked when a stunt went wrong and she even brought up her ace in the hole, his run in with the Horns. If it hadn't of been for her tenacity, not only would his goose have been cooked but Dom's as well. He inwardly shuddered at the memory.

She was currently winning another argument. She'd been home with him for the last two days helping him recover from a nasty cold. He had fought with her all the way. He was a grown man after all. He didn't need a mother. Deep down though, he was happy to have her win this one. He kind of liked someone else being there for him, taking care of him. The fact that she didn't let his gruffness deter her was an added bonus. He knew she must really love him to put up with him. After all she'd stuck around this long. It gave him a deep sense of satisfaction and contentment he hadn't known had been lacking in his life, even if he had been forced out of his comfort zone on more than one occasion.

"Look I know you're doing better, but you can still be courteous enough to eat the soup I went to all the trouble to make you."

"You could have saved yourself the trouble. I told you I wasn't hungry."

Hawke sat back in his chair and crossed his arms the very picture of defiance.

"Fine," Cait said her Texas accent drawing out the 'i.' "If you're going to act like a baby I guess I'll just have to treat you like one."

She crossed over to the table, picked up his spoon, and dipped it in the soup.

Hawke narrowed his eyes on her. He got a sinking suspicion she might try to force the soup down his throat while holding his nose shut.

"Cait you're not…"

She got an evil grin on her face and started making airplane noises as she flew the spoon toward his mouth.

Hawke grumbled under his breath and rolled his eyes.

"Come on Hawke, open up. If you're a good boy and eat all your soup, I'll let you stay up extra late tonight," she cajoled.

Hawke's eyes twinkled. He opened his mouth for the spoon, but held on when she would have pulled it back. Taking her by the hand he pulled her into his lap before letting go of the spoon.

"Why wait for tonight? I can show you how well I feel right now." He grinned.

Hawke placed his hand at the back of her neck and angled her head toward his. He captured her lips in a soft and tender kiss. He broke the kiss moments later and angled his ear to the ceiling listening.

Caitlin patted his shoulder as she slid from his grasp.

"Hold that thought," she said dropping the spoon back in the soup before heading to the door.

Hawke ate his soup while the firm helicopter landed and discharged its occupants.

"Hawke," Michael greeted entering the cabin. "Feeling better?"

"If I said no would it make a difference," he said turning his back on the spy and taking his soup bowl to the sink.

"Not for this visit." Michael said as he stepped up to the breakfast bar but remained standing.

"It never does." Hawke turned around to face Michael. Noting the seemingly relaxed pose in contrast with the stiff shoulders and the fact that the spy hadn't made himself at home by finding a comfortable place to sit, Hawke continued. "What you're not making yourself at home, helping yourself to my wine?"

"Hawke did it ever occur to you that I might have better things to do than fly all the way out here to see you?"

"Then why don't you just call…or better yet, leave me alone all together." He crossed his arms defensively.

Seeing his irritation rise, Cait stepped closer to Hawke.

"Believe me," Michael answered as Lauren stopped at his side. "It would make my life much simpler."

"Michael," Cait interrupted before Hawke could respond. She laid a hand on Hawke's arm. "I assume you came here for a reason."

Michael cleared his throat and glanced at Cait.

"Right, I have some news about your search for your brother."

Cait felt Hawke tense beneath her hand. They shared a glance. His was wary but hopeful. Hers was supportive. Hawke dropped his arms and covered Cait's hand with his own. He braced himself.

"Well?"

"We've discovered a woman who might be Le's mother, Ana."

He motioned to Lauren who retrieved a file from the briefcase she carried. She held it out to Hawke. Cait took it and began flipping through it when Hawke didn't move. His eyes focused on Michael.

"She's currently living in Colorado and married to a Major Christopher Connelly, Air Force, retired."

"I don't get it Michael," Hawke finally spoke. "If she really is Le's mother why hasn't she come looking for him?"

"She has Hawke." Caitlin looked up from the file. "It says here that Minh probably was following a lead on Ana when she went missing. It seems she must have literally hit a dead end when Minh died."

"That's probably my fault." Michael added. At the look that Hawke shot him, he continued, "When you became determined to adopt Le, I did everything in my power to protect him. I effectively erased his existence from every record possible. For those necessary ones like school, I simply had his origins obscured. Whether you want to acknowledge it or not, Le is a huge liability."

Hawke's jaw tensed a vein stood out on his neck pulsing. Hawke had clearly moved beyond irritation into the realm of truly angry. Michael wasn't sure if it was because he was angry at the spy or if Hawke had realized that finding Le's mother would mean he would lose Le.

"I did it for his own good Hawke."

"You did it for the same reason you do anything, Michael." Hawke bit out. "You did it to protect your investment in Airwolf."

Hawke paced away. He crossed over to the fireplace and stared at a picture on the mantle. It was one taken in 'Nam of him and his brother.

"How do I know this isn't some plan of yours to reduce that liability?"

"Because, I wouldn't do that Hawke, you **know** me. I would never use a child that way."

"But someone else might. Have you considered that?" Lauren said pointedly to Hawke. Marella had told her to always back Archangel when it came to dealing with Hawke.

"You mean the Committee?"

A beeping sound from across the room stopped further conversation.

"That's the satellite phone, it's probably for me." Michael moved to intercept Hawke who was already retrieving the phone.

"Hawke," he ground out. Hawke's countenance changed abruptly from irritation to concern as he listened to the voice on the other end. Caitlin instinctively moved to his side.

"Hawke?" she asked gently when he hung up the phone.

Hawke looked dazed a moment before registering the hand she'd put on his shoulder after calling his name.

"We'll have to continue this later." His eyes met Caitlin's. "Le's been shot."

Denial was the first thing that came to Cait's mind, then concern. All though she was concerned for Le, her main thoughts were for Hawke. She knew no matter what the circumstances, he would blame himself. She saw him shut out the world which included her. A mask of impassivity slammed across his face.

Hawke didn't say a word as he shouldered past her for the door. He barely broke his stride as he stopped for his jacket before heading for the FIRM chopper parked on the landing dock.

"Y'all better hurry or he'll leave without us," Caitlin threw over her shoulder as she stopped for her own jacket at the door.

"He will you know," Lauren said as Michael seemed to hesitate.

"Fine, but I want you to stay here and call the FIRM for pickup." He moved as fast as he could with the cane which was remarkably well. "And have someone meet me at the hospital. I need to know everything about Ana Connelly. And I need it yesterday."


	23. Chapter 23

_Ever since Dom had brought the news of Le's death down the stark white hospital corridors, Hawke had been silent, withdrawn. Caitlin had clung to him in those first few moments, her grief evident, tears streaming. He'd hugged her absently, taking no comfort in her embrace. When she'd stepped away to hug Dom, he let her go._

_He'd made no independent moves to touch her since. Oh, he accepted her embrace when she offered, but it was always a bit stiff on his part as if he'd rather be anywhere else. He wouldn't go to the bed they shared until after she was asleep, and was always gone when she woke in the morning. Caitlin knew the reason for it. She knew he was trying to protect himself from the inevitable loss that occurred when living._

_Caitlin felt his pain and grief. Despite the impassive mask he wore, the signs of his inner struggles were evident to her. His whole body bore the burden. It was the set of his shoulders, the clenched jaw, and the stormy blue eyes. Her heart broke for him._

_She knew he blamed himself. He had just told her he loved her. Not, that he knew she had heard. He thought she was already asleep when he whispered the barely audible words late Christmas night, scared that somehow if he said them aloud, she'd be taken from him. It didn't help any that fate seemed to constantly reinforce that fear by taking those that Hawke decided to care for. A scarce week later Le had been tragically gunned down in a drive by shooting._

_It was even more tragic to Cait who knew it was all her fault. CC had said she'd have Le killed in exactly that way in the moments before they'd both taken a tumble over the cliff where the new falls formed. It had been the end of Carrie Carter, and the beginning of a new chapter in her relationship with Hawke. If she had stayed in Texas she would probably be dead by now, but Le could still be alive, maybe._

_Michael had thoroughly investigated the incident. With all his resources, he couldn't find any connection however tenuous to the Carters. He assured them all it was just a tragic case of an innocent bystander being hit by stray bullets. The gang responsible had really been after Chris Connelly a troubled boy Le had befriended a boy that was now a model citizen living somewhere in Colorado. It was bittersweet that Chris was now enjoying the life that Le almost had with his new found mother._

Caitlin was startled awake. She searched the room until her eyes rested on a loudly snoring Dominic Santini. She tried to stretch on the black vinyl chairs she'd used as an impromptu bed but found there wasn't enough room. It had been much cozier when leaning against Hawke earlier. Slowly she sat up and tried to work out some of the kinks from her less than comfortable sleeping arrangement.

Feeling every one of the reluctant pops she coaxed from her tired body, she frowned and looked at her watch. She'd been asleep for a little over two hours. Surely, there must be some news by now. Le had been taken to emergency surgery as soon as possible after his arrival. It had taken them over an hour to get to the hospital, and that had been…too long ago for her to think about.

Dom's snores changed tempo as he adjusted his position. He sat in similar vinyl covered thinly cushioned chairs as she. Caitlin was amazed that he could sleep so well on such an unforgiving surface.

Noting Hawke's absence Cait headed for the door of the waiting room hoping she wouldn't have to search the entire grounds before she found him. Luckily he was just down the hall.

Hawke leaned against the wall one leg bent at the knee so his foot was pressed flat to the same wall. Standing there he looked like a cigarette ad. He had had his eyes closed but upon hearing the door to the waiting room open he turned to look at Cait. For just a moment she saw the guilt and vulnerability in them before he hid it again.

"Any news," she asked as she drew near.

Hawke sighed before pushing off the wall and accepting her embrace.

"None yet, but the police came by just after you fell asleep. They said it was a drive by shooting…gangs or something. Michael's checking to make sure."

Caitlin tensed at his words.

"Hawke," she began unsteadily. "Just before she…CC…She said I'd just disappear, but Le…Hawke she said she'd have him killed in a drive by shooting. What…what if this is my fault?"

Hawke pulled her closer and held her as her eyes watered. She couldn't help the tears that began spilling onto his shoulder. He hated to see Cait like this. Her blaming herself and crying wasn't how she usually dealt with these things. He found it unnerving and felt the need to comfort her. He wanted to her to get back the kick butt attitude that got her through most of their encounters with those bent on manipulating their lives.

"Shush, shush, this is not your fault. Even if the Carters are behind this, Cait," he pulled back and brushed the hair from her face. "This isn't your fault. It's theirs. And, if they are behind this, I'll make sure they don't hurt anyone ever again."

She looked into his stern eyes and nodded.

"You just make sure I'm right there beside you when you do." She said.

Her confidence that he would do what he promised filled him with warmth. Hawke was also glad she seemed to regain some of her bravado as well. He gave her a quick flash of a grin.

"That's more like it."

"Hawke"

They both turned at the sound their arms still around the others waist.

"Nadia, what are you doing here?" Hawke asked as the woman in white strode toward them.

She stopped just in front of the couple. Her eyes glanced briefly at their obvious togetherness with just a touch of envy. She put her hands in her lab coat.

Caitlin noted the blue-green scrub top she wore and the name tag on the coat, Dr. Nadia Kilmer.

"I'm taking a sabbatical from my work with Michael. I needed to renew some of my medical training and chose to do it close to home. I assisted with Le's surgery. He's being moved to ICU for now."

"Is he going to be all right?" Cait asked when Hawke found he couldn't speak.

Nadia turned her compassionate gaze on Cait for a moment before explaining Le's condition to them both.

"The surgery was difficult. He had four bullets in him. We removed the one from his arm without any complications. He'll need to spend his time in therapy, but should have full function. There was one bullet in his left side and one in the abdomen. The one in his side was close to the kidney. We removed it and he shouldn't lose any function in that organ. The other nicked his spleen. We were able to cauterize the wound, but he lost a lot of blood. Even after the transfusions it will be some time before we know the extent of the damage." She hesitated.

"You said there were four bullets," Hawke stated with only a hint of the question he was afraid to ask.

"Yes…the fourth bullet is lodged close to his spine. The chief surgeon on his case decided it was best to wait until he was more stable to continue. In a few days, we'll see if we can remove it safely. One wrong move and he could be paralyzed." She laid a hand on Hawke's arm. "I'm sorry it's not better news."

Cait suppressed her twinge of jealousy; after all, if he hadn't of left Nadia on their date, then she would have probably died instead of CC.

"Can we see him," she asked.

Nadia turned to Cait.

"I'll send an orderly as soon as he settled." She started to move down the hall.

"Thanks," Hawke called after her.

Nadia half turned and nodded. "I'll check back in tomorrow."

Hawke hung his head and stared at the floor. Cait could see him start to wrap a cocoon of worry and the weight of the world about him.

"Hey," Cait moved to hug him again. "We'll get through this."

Hawke returned the hug. Since they'd gotten together, she'd made it her mission to keep him from brooding too much. She seemed to be able to tell that he was about to go into angst mode and would do her best to nip it in the bud. Though he sometimes missed the time with his own thoughts, Hawke knew she did it because she loved him. It also didn't hurt that she seemed to know when to let him be as well. All in all, he figured it was probably brought some much needed balance to his life. He gave her a wry grin.

"What do you say we go get some coffee? It'll be a while before that orderly shows. I'm sure sleeping Santini will need something before seeing Le."

"Sure," Cait answered him. "I wish I could sleep anywhere like he does and so soundly. I don't know how he does it. Two hours and I was stiff as a board."

"Yeah but you don't have as much padding as he does." Hawke said with a twitch of his lips.

"Better not let him hear you say that." She patted him on the chest.

They walked hand in hand to the cafeteria.

~~~AW~~~

Nadia placed the stethoscope back around her neck. She straightened and made a notation in the chart before returning it to the hook at the end of the bed.

"Well Le everything seems to be healing just fine. As long as there are no complications overnight, we'll do your surgery in the morning. It's a very delicate procedure, but Dr. Cord believes he'll be able to remove the last bullet without causing any further damage to you spinal cord."

"If all goes well, you'll be up chasing girls in no time," Hawke quipped.

Le turned pink.

"Uh, I don't think so," he murmured.

"Oh come on," Nadia said glancing over at Cait. "Now that your uncle's off the market you've got to keep up the Hawke reputation."

"Heaven help us."

All eyes turned to the man dressed in white who'd just entered the room.

"Michael."

"Dr. Kilmer," he inclined his head. "How's our patient?"

"Doing well," she smiled. "He'll have surgery in the morning to remove the final bullet."

"Good, Hawke, a word." Michael stepped outside into the corridor.

Hawke frowned then turned to Le.

"I'll be back in a moment," he squeezed Le on the shoulder and turned to leave.

"**We'll** be right back," Cait corrected gently. She kissed Le on the cheek before following Hawke out.

They came to a stop just down the hall from Le's room.

"Where's Santini?"

"At the hangar," Hawke responded tersely to the interrogation. "What's this all about?"

Michael rubbed his chin.

"I had hoped to tell all of you at once. I have news on Le's shooting and Ana Connelly." He paused. "The cops managed to arrest the boy that shot Le."

"Good," Hawke said. "It'll save me the trouble."

"Maybe," Michael continued. "He turned himself in, wanted to make a deal. He said he needed protection."

"Protection from whom," Cait asked.

"He says a man paid him to do it. He couldn't give much of a description other than height and build, but…"

"But," Hawke bit out.

"**But,** he still had the envelope that had the money in it. We were able to lift a print. It belonged to Chad Carter."

Cait grabbed Hawke's arm to steady herself.

Hawke's eyes went cold. He barely noticed the vice like grip on his arm.

"Don't worry about Le. I've assigned a discreet guard to him."

Michael studied the pilot in front of him. In moments the man had gone from reserved to a coiled spring. He was like a predator crouched and ready. He regretted that he'd have to inform Hawke about Ana.

"Michael you said you had news about Ana?"

Trust Caitlin to remember the details despite the overwhelming bad news he'd already given.

"I had her story checked out. I also had Dr. Kilmer do some tissue tests. The results are conclusive."

"Well," Hawke said doing a poor job at hiding his irritation. _Why couldn't the spy just spit it out?_

"She's definitely Le's mother. I'm having her flown in. I thought I'd inform you before she got here. She doesn't know he's been shot yet. I thought I would wait until after the surgery."

"Michael, she's his mother. She's got a right to know."

Hawke was both relieved and worried. At least Le would have his mother, but she'd probably take him back to Colorado to live with her and her husband. And, if she had remarried, what did that say about St John's fate?


	24. Chapter 24:  Ana

Le's surgery had gone well. His spinal cord was bruised and it was uncertain if he'd have use of his legs. However, the doctors felt there was a good chance once the swelling went down. He was still in ICU and thus only allowed one visitor at a time. It was currently Caitlin's turn.

Hawke was pacing in the waiting room. Dom watched from his seat in the corner.

"String if you keep that up you'll wear a hole in floor."

Hawke glared at Dom as he came to a sudden stop. Dom stared evenly back.

"Why don't you sit down? It can't hurt and I'm sure the janitors would prefer it to the rut you're creating."

Hawke resisted the urge to sigh as he crossed the tile and sat heavily in one of the hard black chairs. He never could hold out when Dom had that paternal tone.

"I'm sure it will all work out."

"What if it doesn't Dom? Le's mom is seeing him for the first time in over two years and he's hurt. He may not even walk again. I'm a terrible uncle."

"Ah, String you've done the best you can. Anyone with a brain can see that."

Hawke refused to be comforted by his surrogate father. He crossed his arms against his chest defensively and leaned against the wall.

"I don't know Dom, if it was me, I'd probably never let him see me again."

"Well, there's no use in worrying about it until she gets here. When did Michael say they'd be here anyway?"

Hawke glanced at his watch. "He went to pick her up an hour ago. They should be here any minute."

Hawke looked like he was going to start pacing again.

"Why don't I go get us some coffee?" Dom said as he pushed off the unforgiving chairs. He tried to shake out the pins and needles feeling racing through his leg. Sitting in one position too long had made it go to sleep. "Can you at least try not to imagine the worst case scenario before you even meet her," he pleaded.

"No promises, Dom"

"Humph, don't worry. I'm not holding my breath." Dom shuffled down the hall in search of coffee leaving String to his own thoughts.

~~~AW~~~

Hawke saw the diminutive Asian woman coming down the hall. Michael followed a few paces behind. Since she was not wearing all white, he decided that she must be Ana.

He stood to greet them. Before he could react the woman reached out and slapped him across the cheek. Startled, Hawke took a step back this was not what he'd been expecting.

"Hey, what is this?" He scrutinized Michael searching for some hint as to why she might hit him.

"Hawke this is Ana Connelly, Le's mother," Michael introduced while keeping all hint of amusement out of his voice. It wouldn't do to antagonize the pilot after such an eventful meeting.

"You," she said. "You are responsible for this. I find my son only to see him shot. This is how you treat your cháu trai?"

"I've treated him like my own son," Hawke retorted, "which is more than I can say for you, giving him to your sister." Hawke struggled to keep his anger in check. He hadn't wanted to alienate this woman. But, his gut reaction at being attacked was to go on the offensive.

"St. John wanted him safe. I thought he would be safer here than in a war torn country. It broke my heart to send him away, but I did what was best. **You** will do the same."

Hawke didn't fully comprehend what Ana meant. Once she'd uttered his brother's name, Hawke focused on that singularly. Here after all these years was confirmation that St. John had been alive long after the Army had given up. Hope bubbled up inside him.

"You knew my brother. Where is he?"

Ana began to walk away.

Hawke grabbed her by the arm and turned her to face him.

"Tell me about my brother. Tell me about St. John!"

Ana looked pointedly at the restraining hand on her bicep, she met cloudy blue eyes with a determined stare.

"You want to know about your brother. I'll tell you about your brother," she began angrily. "Then Le and I will leave and you will not bother us. You will not visit. You will only write at birthdays and Christmas. You will not bring your ways to him. He will not know of the war you still fight. It is why St. John sent us away." Her voice broke on St. John's name.

Ana's words finally pushed past Hawke's overwhelming concern for his brother. He withdrew his hand beginning to comprehend the price he was paying for information on his brother. _Was it worth it?_ He loved St. John, but loved Le too. It wasn't a choice he would willingly have made.

He wondered at the other choices he'd made. When he'd come back from Vietnam he'd isolated himself from everything and everyone, even Dom. In college he'd only had passing affairs, and after, he was so focused on his quest that there was little room for anyone else. He'd been used to being lonely when Archangel gave his life purpose again. When Gabriel showed him how lonely he'd become without even knowing it. He'd kept his relationship with Caitlin static for a long time, first by being friends and now by not taking the next step. Hell, he hadn't even told her he loved her. He wondered again if the cost was worth it and came to the conclusion that it had to be. One day he would find his brother, and then everything would be worth it.

Ana sighed when Hawke withdrew his hand. Her anger seeped away and left sorrow in its place, sorrow for St. John and surprisingly sorrow for the man before her. How two brothers could be so alike and yet so different, she did not know. St. John had been kind and gentle. Stringfellow was rude and gruff. Yet, she could see that it was desperation that drove him. He had lost those he loved and struggled to hang on to whoever was left.

"Your brother was a man haunted. He believed everyone around him, everyone he truly cared for would die. He blamed himself for the death of his parents. Said he was responsible for a friend who died before he joined your Army. He came to Việt Nam so that the death around him would have purpose. He felt an obligation to you, to protect his em trai from his curse. But, you had to follow. You could not leave him to find his đường dẫn riêng. He saw his capture by the VC as punishment for putting you in danger.

The first time we met, I was người phụ nữ mới. A chiến tranh Chúa brought him and others to our village to repair damages. I was given to them as a reward. He kept the others from using me. He was my Anh hùng. They came back again the next spring and the next. He taught me English. When he was no longer with the chiến tranh Chúa he returned. We did not marry but he gave me his ring when he found I was mang thai. He did not want us to die as if all that I survived did not matter. I begged him to stay. He might have if not for the mine that killed my father. He gave me money and sent me to Saigon. I never saw him again.

Minh had a way out. I sent Le with her. I came later and searched. I don't know where St. John is, but if you ever do find him let him know he saved us both."

This time he didn't stop her when she turned to go. Michael escorted her to Le's room. A few minutes later Cait emerged. She headed straight for Hawke.

"Oh Hawke," she said as she wrapped him in her arms.

He slipped his arms around her and buried his face in the hair at her neck.

"She's taking him away, Cait."

"I know. We'll get through this. It'll all be okay. We'll find a way to make it okay." Caitlin finally fell silent. She tried her best, but knew it didn't matter what she said.

They were going to lose Le. She knew Hawke had worried about it ever since Michael had told them about finding Ana. Caitlin had worried about it herself. She had begun to think of Le like a son, the completion to the family she had found with Hawke. They would both miss him deeply.

Hawke took comfort in the gentle stroke of Cait's hand on his neck. He couldn't imagine not holding her at a time like this. He wondered again at his choice to maintain their friendship for so long. He may be losing Le, but at least he had her. Again, it wasn't a choice he would have willingly made. But, he couldn't deny that having her made the loss bareable.

Dom arrived with two cups of what the vending machine had called coffee. He stopped at the sight of the couple. His heart clenched and his mind filled with questions. He waited a moment, two. Finally he couldn't take it anymore and cleared his throat.

String eased back from Caitlin sliding his hand into hers. His guarded eyes turned on Dom.

Dom looked from String to Cait.

"What's happened?" He asked gruffly.

Caitlin glanced at Hawke before stepping into the silence to explain.

"Ana's arrived. As soon as Le's able, she taking him home to Colorado."

Dom relaxed a little. "Well that doesn't sound too bad. She is his mother. She can take care of him better in her own home. After all, the cabin isn't the best place to recover from being shot unless of course you're String." Dom chuckled gesturing with the coffee. It threatened to spill and he set it on a nearby table.

"Dom, she doesn't want me to visit," Hawke said plaintively. "I can't even write unless it's his birthday or Christmas."

Dom placed a hand on Hawke's shoulder. He knew how much the kid loved Le. He knew how it felt to be kept away from your child. Now, he understood the clench the couple had been in. He figured each had needed the comfort. He remembered how Alan, Hawke's dad, had promised him he'd always have a place in the boys' lives when he lost Sally Anne. At the time it had been small comfort, but looking back, it had meant the world.

"I wish I knew what to say kid. All you can do is make sure he always has a place to come home to." They all stood solemnly for a few minutes.

"Hey," Caitlin said with a sideways grin and a twinkle in her eyes. "Did Ana say how **long** those letters could be?"

Dom gave a guffaw and burst out into a big grin. Leave it to Cait to find a bright side to all this.

Hawke's eyes met Cait's. She was beginning to be as sneaky as a certain white clad spy he knew. He gave her a boyish grin as the realization hit him. He knew there was a reason he loved her. Maybe it was time to tell her.

"You know Cait, I don't believe she did."

Translations:

cháu trai: nephew

em trai: little brother

người phụ nữ mới: new woman

chiến tranh Chúa: war lord

Anh hùng: hero

mang thai: pregnant

đường dẫn riêng: own path


	25. Chapter 25

Stringfellow Hawke turned his face into the breeze letting it ruffle the longer strands of hair at the top of his crew cut. He loved being out on the dock playing his cello with his dog Tet at his feet and the world with all its trouble and trials fading from his existence. For the longest time, this…tranquility, this…solitude…refuge was necessary. For the longest time, he had needed the world to fade away. Even after the horrors of war had abated from its all-consuming hold on his sanity, the loss of St. John in that storm was too much for him to bear. For the longest time, he had simply hid at his cabin with only Dom trying to get him to live again.

Hiding was no longer an option. His life had purpose again. The tempo of the music he was coaxing from the cello changed as he mused on that topic.

_In fact_, he thought, _more than one purpose_. He was still searching for answers on what happened to his brother. Recently he'd met Ana Connelly, the woman St. John had had a son with after being listed as MIA in Vietnam.

She hadn't been too thrilled with the meeting. Her son, Le had been shot and she'd placed the blame squarely at Hawke's feet. At first, she'd threatened to sever Hawke's ties to his nephew only allowing a couple of letters a year. Fortunately, she and Cait had hit it off immediately. Caitlin with a lot of input from Le had convinced her to relent. He still couldn't visit very often, Le's safety had to come first, but he could keep up a constant correspondence which was more than he'd hoped for.

And, Ana had given Michael a lot of information on St. John. She remembered the name of the war lord who'd held him during the war. She'd even told them a little about the unit he'd joined after being rescued. All though she had filled in a few years of St. John's absence, she had no idea of his ultimate fate. He frowned slightly with the realization that he was no closer to finding answers than he had been when he stumbled into his second purpose, flying Airwolf.

What a trip she was. She was the ultimate in flying, not just a jet nor just a helicopter. Flying her was like walking on water, thrilling and scary at the same time. It may have started as just a way to force the Firm into investigating St. John, but it became so much more. Helping people in trouble, taking down the bad guys, even helping Michael with his missions for the greater good gave him direction. It was a direction he hadn't even known he needed. He didn't always like being shot at, but the ability to make a difference in people's lives and in the world filled some of the emptiness in his soul.

Flying Airwolf had also given Dom a new lease on life. Not that Dom would ever admit to being past his prime, but Hawke had seen how his life had come down to trying to keep his business afloat and reliving his past glories with Hawke's father during the war to anyone who would listen at the local airfield bar. Even if Dom couldn't talk about his time with Airwolf, it gave him a since of usefulness that he had sorely missed as a civilian. He had given up the military to raise the two orphaned boys of his closest friend and while he would never regret that decision their adulthood left him at loose ends for a long time. Manning the engineer's console not only gave him a way to reconnect and redefine his relationship with one of the boys he'd raised, but it also let him make a difference in people's lives as well.

Most of the people they helped drifted out of their lives almost as fast as they'd drifted in, but a select few had formed lasting friendships like Caitlin O'Shannessy. Unconsciously the music changed tempo again.

Caitlin O'Shannessy had become another purpose in his life. Somehow, quite unexpectedly, she had burrowed her way past all his defenses and taken up permanent residency in his heart. She was a handful right from the start. Her fiery temper, quick wit, and sheer tenacity made her instantly appealing in a way that surprised him. She was different from the women he usually found himself drawn to. He had categorized her as cute rather than gorgeous as somewhat naive rather than sophisticated. All though he had initially flirted with her, he quickly relegated their relationship to just friends when he realized she had come to California to stay.

As Hawke learned more about Caitlin, he found himself having to constantly reassess his opinion of her. Her naiveté gave way to guilelessness which in turn gave way to an honesty and sincerity that he found refreshing and sorely needed in his personal life. He also quit thinking of her as cute. During her time in California, she had transformed from the cute tomboy, girl next door. She was instead a beautiful woman both inside and out. He had watched silently as others had seen her beauty, at first as a protective big brother friend type, but later as a man seeing it for himself. It had bothered him from the beginning when she had dated someone else. She always seemed to be trying to change to suit the guy rather than being herself. It had annoyed him in a way he couldn't understand until he finally admitted to himself that she meant more to him than just a co-worker and friend, more than just part of his 'family.'

He had finally admitted to himself that he was in love with her. And, with that admission their relationship had changed again. He'd retreated to his cabin after she'd been poisoned and almost raped. He had needed to get a handle on his emotions. He'd almost killed the man who'd hurt her with his bare hands releasing a rage that had shocked him with its intensity. It was only her calling for him, her need of him that had brought him back from that precipice.

Hawke shook his head trying to dislodge the images of Cait's battered body, of her lying motionless in the hospital. He abruptly stopped playing the cello and rested his right arm across his knee and took a deep breath.

She'd come looking for him after leaving the hospital reamed him a new one for isolating himself when she showed up at his cabin. A smile spread across his lips as he recalled how she followed him up to the old sleeping loft and poked him forcefully in the chest to make her point. They'd made love afterwards and he'd known. He'd known he would never be the same. He had found the woman he wanted to spend forever with and it scared the hell out of him.

He had tried to push her away, but she surprised him again. She stepped back. She put them back on the friends footing. She, he sighed. She gave him the time and space he needed not once, not even twice, but three times to not only adjust to his new found revelation but to accept it as well. He was incredibly lucky.

Hawke took one last look across the peaceful lake before gathering up his cello and the old fishing stool and heading back to the cabin. His dog Tet dutifully followed at his side.

"Done all ready," Caitlin asked from her position on the sofa. She had been reading a book while he'd been outside. "You usually play a lot longer."

"Yeah, well I wouldn't your life to get too routine." Hawke sat down on the sofa beside her as she moved her book to the table. He slipped his arm around her with an ease that still surprised him. Pulling her closer his lips met hers for a tender lingering kiss.

"Hmm, not that I mind, but what was that for," Caitlin questioned him while her hand sneaked up to the top button on his shirt and toyed with it.

A small smile flitted across his features and settled in his eyes.

"I was thinking I would make you dinner steak, potatoes, the whole nine yards." He kissed her again.

Caitlin pulled back to look at him squarely.

"It isn't my birthday. It isn't even your birthday. What gives? Are you about to go running off to who knows where with Dom and leave me to watch the hangar again?" she teased.

"Nope, I plan on staying here all weekend. If it makes you feel better, we can call it a lesson in cooking on a wood burning stove. You could help me look out for the hot spots. Beside, can't a guy make a girl dinner without there being some ulterior motive?" Hawke pulled her close again and started to kiss her neck.

"All weekend hmm…" she tilted her neck and began stroking his hair. "I think we both know what your motives are."

Hawke pulled back and she caught the gleam in his eyes before she found herself lying with her back on the sofa.

"I do enjoy your lessons though." She was smiling when he kissed her.

He kissed her lips, her neck, and her shoulder. He moved on to undo the buttons on her blouse and kiss the skin just above the cups of her bra.

Caitlin shifted so her pelvis was in line underneath him as he moved down her now naked abdomen to her bellybutton. There Hawke lingered a moment before slowly making his way back up her body while riding her of her shirt all together. As he moved back to kissing her neck and shoulders. She proceeded to unbutton his shirt and push it over his biceps until it was unceremoniously dropped to the floor. She indulged herself by rubbing her hands over his muscular frame.

Something nagged at the edge of Hawke's hearing. He dismissed it as Cait began to systematically kiss all the spots she'd discovered that made him incoherent with passion, just behind his ear, down his carotid artery. She flicked her tongue briefly into the hollow of his neck and was rewarded with the hard press of his jean clad erection.

He let out a gasp when she gently took his nipple between her teeth and flicked her tongue across it. Hawke undid the clasp on her bra with one hand as she pulled at the buttons on his pants. Catlin had just released the tip when he took one breast in his mouth and sucked hard. She arched back. One hand grabbed the back of his head pushing him closer. She hooked a leg over his trying to feel his erection against her while her breast still filled his mouth.

Hawke came to a sudden stop. His breathing was hard and he took several deep breaths while staring out the front window. He scowled before sliding off Caitlin and hastily adjusting himself and buttoning up his pants.

"I'm going to kill him," he murmured angrily as he retrieved his shirt and rushed to the door.

Cait hastily clasped her bra into place and pulled her shirt on. She could hear someone coming up the front steps to the cabin.

Hawke managed to throw on his shirt. He had no time to button it, but made it to the door just as it opened.

"Hawke," Michael said. He saw first the angry scowl on the younger man's face. His one good eye flicked over him. He glanced briefly toward the couch. He noted Cait's disheveled hair and how she resolutely kept her back to him as she fiddled with her blouse. His lips twitched and couldn't help the mock innocence that permeated his next words. "I'm not interrupting, am I?"

Despite his irritation, or perhaps because of it, Hawke gave a sarcastic reply. "Why of course not Michael. Your timing is _impeccable _as always."

Michael smiled and seeing as how Cait had stopped messing with her blouse and had turned to greet him, he invited himself in.

"Come right on in Michael. Make yourself at home. You will anyway." Hawke continued as the spy made his way into the cabin.

Michael nudged Tet with his cane from one of the chairs next to the fire. The dog having been dislodged decided the hearth was a much warmer perch anyway. He yawned and laid his head on his paws as if the change had been entirely his idea.

Michael sat in the recently vacated chair and wondered briefly if he would wind up with blue tick hound hair on his pristinely white suit. He smiled at the way Caitlin was blushing. _Oh yeah. He had definitely interrupted something._

Hawke stood leaning on the fireplace mantle trying to appear comfortable while dealing with the aftermath of his interrupted activity.

While he admitted to himself that he relished irritating Hawke, Michael really didn't want Caitlin to be uncomfortable. He hastily suppressed his smile.

"Caitlin, you're looking well."

Caitlin picked up on the hint of amusement and couldn't resist the opportunity. It reminded her of being a caught making out on the sofa by her older brothers when she was a teenager.

"Thank you Michael," she said innocently. "Hawke's been giving me lessons on a variety of things to do with remote cabin living. I've really come to enjoy it. All though I haven't quite developed his sense of hearing." She said a wry smile on her lips.

"Really, are you sure it doesn't get…well…routine?" Michael said catching the mischief in Cait's eyes.

"Oh no, there's lots a variety. After all there are things to do indoors, and of course there's the great outdoors. This place offers endless possibilities." She glanced at Hawke enjoying his disgust at her hidden meanings. "Would you like some tea? I'm sure it would be hot in no time."

"Thank you no, perhaps later."

Hawke cleared his throat reining in the frustration evoked by their evident pleasure at his discomfort.

"You have a reason for being here, Michael?"

Michael turned his gaze on Hawke. He decided he'd better get to the point before the man threw him out.

"I thought you'd like to know Ana and Le made it safely home. I arranged everything so he'll be known as Le Connelly. The anonymity will add an extra layer of security. No one should be able to trace him back to you."

"Thanks Michael."

Michael tilted his head at the heartfelt gratitude.

"I also have an update on Chad Carter. According to the tap we have on his father's phone, he's definitely in the Los Angeles area. He's been very clever. He only uses pay phones and never the same one twice. He must be paying everything with cash. We're trying to track his movements but without a reliable description…."

"It's like looking for a needle in a haystack," Hawke commented. He rubbed his chin in deep thought.

"And, we don't even know what the needle looks like." Cait added. "It's a little scary thinking that he could be anyone on the street."

"Which is why I want to put you into protective custody," Michael began. "The taps confirm he's been tracking your movements."

"Michael, we've already been through this with CC. I refuse to live my life in fear."

"What if there's another way?" Hawke broke in.

They both turned toward him.

"You said he's tracking Cait right."

Michael inclined his head in acknowledgement.

"What if we draw him out, make him come to us?"

"Use me as bait?" Cait checked.

Hawke's eyes met hers resolutely. He could see the fear in hers from her last encounter with Chad Carter.

"If we can get him to come to us, we can finish this once and for all."

"We'll have to plan carefully though." Michael stroked his mustache considering.

Cait shifted uncomfortably. "How would we even know him, if he did come after me Hawke?" She couldn't keep the anxiety out of her voice.

"We'll have to make him an offer he can't refuse."

"Make it seem like Cait's all alone and vulnerable. But, it has to be only for a short time, or we'll be waiting around for him to make his move." Michael said. "It has to be something believable too."

"Dom's got a charter up the coast next week. I'll make it look I'm leaving for a couple of days too." Hawke's eyes never left Cait's. "I don't think he'll want to waste any time. He'll make his move fast. But, I'll be with you the whole time."

"And we can wire you, so we'll know if you get into trouble, or just bug the hangar." Michael stroked his moustache to hide the smile forming. He swept the hangar routinely for security reasons and for the fact that it irritated Dominic Santini. If his crew were to leave a bug behind after this op, he could blame it only Santini's lack of vigilance. Hmm, he liked ops that ultimately served more than one purpose. "It's up to you Cait," Michael said. "But I think it's our best chance."


	26. Chapter 26

Caitlin looked through the window in the office at Santini Air. Her arms were crossed against her chest, lower lip caught between her teeth. She was watching Hawke banging around on an A-10 that needed maintenance. At the rate Hawke was going, it would need a lot more after he was done.

She couldn't blame him really. Since Dom had left on his charter a couple of days ago, they'd all been sure an attempt would be made on Caitlin quickly. However, it was now the third day going and nothing had happened. It had them both on edge.

Michael and his agents had packed up the previous day after a heated exchange…"How long do you expect me to devote resources to this Hawke?"

"I don't know **Michael**," Hawke bit out. "But, I thought you'd stick with it more than a couple of days. This is Caitlin we're talking about here."

"I **know** Hawke and I know what that **means**, believe me. But, I can't keep a contingent of agents here indefinitely. I'm already catching heat as it is. Because of the FBI's involvement the Committee considers it a **domestic** matter."

"You can tell the Committee to go to hell!" Hawke stalked away kicking at an empty box angrily on his way. He slammed through the door at the back of the hangar.

Archangel stared after him for a long moment before turning to Caitlin.

"I am sorry Cait. I just don't know what else I can do."

"I know Michael." She placed a hand on his arm. "Thank you for everything." He had left her with a tracer 'just in case.'

Caitlin glanced down at her watch and gave a big sigh. She knew Hawke was worried. Despite the plan, he wouldn't let her stray more than twenty feet. He was having nightmares. He wouldn't talk about them, but she'd heard what he said in his sleep. They seemed like a jumbled up mess of her and Gabrielle. She had tried to comfort him after. But, in typical Hawke fashion he'd refused preferring instead to play his cello into the early morning hours.

Slowly she made her way out to the A-10. Leaning on the side of the helicopter, she stopped next to where his legs stuck out from beneath.

"Hawke, it's almost time for your 3:00 lesson."

He grunted in response.

"You should have just enough time to change before he gets here."

"I told you to reschedule," he groused.

"We've already done that twice, Hawke. He prepaid and now he's threatening to sue if you don't go up today."

"Let him."

"You know Dom can't afford to get involved with a lawsuit. His reputation is on the line," she said heatedly. "Besides this guy has lots of studio contacts."

Hawke rolled out from under the A-10.

"I told Dom when he took that contract I didn't want to do it especially after the way that guy treated you."

"So the guy thinks women belong barefoot and pregnant, that doesn't mean we turn down the business. Besides we can't just shut up shop because something might happen to me. Have you noticed traffic lately?"

He took Cait's hand as she helped him up. He held on as she started to release his.

"I know Cait, but…"

"Hawke," she cut in, "you can't control everything. Am I scared? Yeah. Will I live my life in fear? No." Her eyes searched his, willing him to understand. "Am I gonna' have to call the cops on you again?" She raised an eye brow a smile threatening on her lips.

Hawke broke out into a rare grin as he remembered 'movie night.'

"I know you can take care of yourself Cait." He pulled her into a hug holding on tightly. It's just…I can't lose you," he whispered into her hair.

It was a rare admission of vulnerability.

"Hey," she said as she drew back to look him in the eyes. "If it helps any I'll lock the hangar up tight until you get back, no one in and no one out. I'll just answer the phone and fix the chopper you've been beating up. Besides, Michael left me with a tracer. He'll know if I leave and where I go."

She could tell he was wavering when he dropped his head. She leaned in to catch his eyes. "I'll even agree to close up early and head back to the cabin. What do you say Hawke? An hour and a half and we could be heading home."

"You'll keep the place locked up?" He asked tentatively.

She nodded.

"And keep your gun close?"

"Yeah," she brushed the fringe from his face hooking her hands around his neck. "I even promise to not to call the cops on one overprotective guy."

He resisted the urge to sigh. He knew she'd be safe in the locked up hangar. He also knew she was pretty good at taking care of herself.

"Okay, I'll go change." He gave her a quick squeeze before heading for the locker room.

"Can I watch?" she said with a twinkle in her eyes as he walked away.

"I thought you said it was almost 3:00." He threw over his shoulder. "Don't you think I should be dressed when he gets here?"

Caitlin smiled at the mental picture that gave her. She filed away the thought for future reference then grabbed a wrench. She wondered where to start on the chopper Hawke had just left.

~~~AW~~~

The helicopter hovered its rotors beating the air steadily.

"Okay," Hawke instructed. "You're doing fine. Why don't we see how you handle an inflight emergency? What would you do if, say your engine suddenly flared out?"

"Well first, I'd…" the man beside him faltered. The helicopter started to descend as his hands left the controls and he clutched at his chest. He began breathing shallowly. "Help…help me…."

Hawke reacted immediately to the apparent heart attack. He grabbed the cyclic and placed his feet on the pedals.

"Just take deep breaths," he encouraged while mentally calculating the quickest route to the nearest hospital. He was just about to radio in the unexpected emergency when he felt a sharp pain in his thigh. He looked disbelieving at the man beside him and then down at the hypodermic sticking out of his leg.

The 'student' took back control of the helicopter as Hawke's body went numb.

"Oh don't worry, Mr. Hawke. I'll have you know I can handle any inflight emergency quite well."

He ruthlessly swung the chopper around and headed for a canyon.

As they entered the canyon narrowly missing the steep rocky walls, Hawke tried to make his arms and legs work but they refused to follow his commands. He clumsily knocked the hypodermic out of his leg. He tried to lunge at his attacker but was easily slammed back to the seat.

_He's not a bad pilot,_ was the last militant coherent thought before he lost total consciousness.

~~~AW~~~

Caitlin bit her lip as she tapped her pin on the desk in front of her. She glanced at the clock ticking away on the wall. She threw her pin down in frustration. There was no doubt about it, Hawke was late. She pushed away from the desk and made for the radio. Hawke should have checked in if something had gone wrong.

"This is Santini Air calling Santini One. Please respond."

Cait tried to tamp down her increasing panic. She'd never known Hawke not to respond to a summons if he was able. For once the silence wasn't like him.

"Santini Air to Santini One come on Hawke pick up." She tried to raise him a few more times. The only response was silence.

A chill began to crawl up her spine. A flash of memory…CC's words…"this isn't about just you anymore little Caitlin. It's about Hawke too." Somehow she knew. Chad Carter had Hawke.

~~~AW~~~

"What do you **mean** he's missing?" Michael leaned forward in his limo as if he could reach down the phone line to speak to Caitlin face to face.

"Just that Michael, he had a lesson with a client that wouldn't reschedule. They were supposed to be here twenty minutes ago, but they never showed. I tried raising him on the radio, but there was no response."

"He was supposed to be protecting you. Not taking lessons."

"I know Michael, but what's done is done. Now are you going to help me or what?" Cait waited knowing that despite what Michael wanted the world to believe he would never let Hawke down if he could help it.

Michael sighed wondering when his tidy little business arrangement with Hawke had developed beyond his control, maybe it was when Hawke saved him from Germany. No, he decided, it was probably when Hawke lied to him about whether or not Gabrielle had suffered.

"Tell me everything you know about this client," he demanded.

Caitlin quickly gave him everything she knew which she thought was very little. She ended with her suspicions that Chad Carter had Hawke.

"I'll do whatever I can Cait. Someone will be over shortly to give you some protection."

"Thanks Michael, but the Lady is all the protection I need. I'm on my way to find Hawke now."

"Cait, even with Airwolf's scanners, how can you possibly hope to find Hawke? We don't even know if he's still in California."

"Don't you worry. I can find the chopper he was in, but I could use an engineer?"

Michael's mind began shifting responsibilities as soon as he heard the implied invitation. It was rare that he was allowed the privilege to fly in the machine he helped develop. He never turned down the chance.

"I'll meet you in the usual place in an hour," he told Cait.

"Just don't be late," she said punching the button to disconnect the call. She didn't waist a second starting Airwolf's engines. She had a feeling Hawke was running out of time.

~~~AW~~~

Hawke came awake slowly to the sound of muffled voices. No, he corrected, one voice talking on the phone. Instinct honed in the jungles of Vietnam and reinforced by his years as an operative since had him pretending to be unconscious while he took stalk of his situation.

He was sitting in a wooden chair to which he was tied. He pulled at his bonds testing them. He discovered his legs were also tied to the chair. He dared to crack an eyelid open. He waited as things started to come into focus.

He seemed to be in a small room with a door in front of him. Iron mesh covered the windows in the room instead of glass. Beyond one of those was man who was talking on the phone. He recognized him as the 'student' in the chopper.

The man abruptly slammed the phone down and opened the door to Hawke's cell.

Hawke feigned oblivion. The man strode in and soundly punched him in the gut. He couldn't help the agonized cry. The man was wearing brass knuckles.

"Ah, Mr. Hawke, I see you are awake."

After recovering his breath, Hawke stared at the man defiantly.

"So typical, Cait always did go for the guys who had more muscle than sense." He slammed another punch into Hawke's gut.

"You must be wondering who I am and how I know Cait." He hit Hawke in the jaw.

Hawke spit blood. "I know what you are Carter. You can't hide anymore."

"Oh, I guess you do have a little sense after all. Too bad you figured it out a little late."

He punched Hawke again making his head snap back. "Of course, after I'm done with you, I'll have my fun with Caity. Comfort the grieving and all."

Hawke managed a smirk. "As soon as she lays eyes on you, she'll shoot you."

Carter began to laugh. "You think so?" He reached up and began to peel something from his face.

Hawke looked on in surprised horror as Chad peeled away the face mask he'd been wearing.

"She won't even know it's me, Hawke." One more blow to the head and darkness descended again.


	27. Chapter 27: Show down

Sorry for the delay. Left my job, went six states away to see my spouse, totaled my car (not my fault), and had to deal with a break in. I've had an interesting summer.

May Ernest Borgnine rest in peace. He was truly a great actor, convincible as both a bad guy and a good guy. It is no wonder he won an Oscar. His timeless abilities and consummate professionalism will be sorely missed.

Happy Birthday to JMV. Born 15 July 1944. Know that you still have fans that recognize your acting ability beyond the looks that made your early fame. Please return to acting. I'm sure independent films would love to have your name in their films. God loves you.

~~~AW~~~

As it was Archangel was waiting when Airwolf touched down in the familiar clearing. Despite the circumstances, he found himself grinning. He admired the sleek outline of the stealth helicopter. She truly was a creation to behold.

_Beautiful and deadly,_ he thought as the landing gear came down to rest in the grassy field. He chucked his cane at Stephanie who was wiping at the hair escaping from her long braid.

"Mind the store," he said into the din of wind. He ran to the chopper only the merest hint of a limp in his quick gait.

Michael had barely closed the door when Caitlin lifted off. He gingerly eased into the grey flight suit. While he appreciated the necessity of a G-suit that also monitored bio-rhythms, he wished he could just wear his trademark white suit.

_Hmm, maybe I could just get R & D to work on integrating one into my normal attire,_ he thought. But, then where would he hide his weapons given the bulk of an extra layer. And, it wasn't like he had the need on a regular basis.

As he settled into the engineering station, he glanced at the young woman in the right seat in front of him. He froze a moment in instant recognition, the set of the shoulders, the unwavering concentration, the crisp efficiency and detachment when issuing orders, the otherwise complete silence.

_Since when,_ he mused,_ did Caitlin become so much like Hawke?_ He remembered the first incident with Horn, remembered when he told Cait and Santini Hawke was dead after a botched defection. _Since Hawke became the one in trouble,_ he answered himself. But the silence from Caitlin grated on his nerves. She was always the source of unwavering hope and optimism in their ragtag little band.

"So," he began casually, "you never said how you plan on finding Hawke?"

The tan and brown hues of the dessert landscape below flew past at 300 knots as Caitlin shifted in her seat. She knew the general direction Hawke had taken the 'student.' As a precaution for both student and innocent bystanders, Santini Air always followed one of several different flight plans all of which took them over the dessert for most of the flight. He had told her which route he was taking, but there was more to it than that.

"Well, I guess there's no harm in telling you," she finally said. "It isn't as if you could use it to find the lair."

"Thanks for the vote of confidence," he said dryly.

Caitlin glanced back at him briefly a genuine smile on her lips.

"After that whole thing with Sawyer, Hawke was worried someone would try to grab one of us while on routine business for the hangar. So…."

They both knew Hawke was only really worried that she would be grabbed again.

"So?"

"So, he took precautions. He didn't want us to be vulnerable in that way again."

And that was the crux of it. They all knew that her actions had made a bad situation worse. She had felt guilty about it for a long time and had even accepted the distance that Hawke had insisted on, deciding that just being friends was enough.

"What kind of precautions?" Michael's interest was piqued. If they had a way of tracking down one of their choppers, he wanted to make sure no one else could use the same technique to track them. If it could lead someone to wherever Hawke kept Airwolf, he'd have to find a way to circumvent its effectiveness. Despite its usefulness in keeping tabs on the pilots of Santini Air, the security of Airwolf and his arrangement with Hawke had to be protected until of course he could produce solid evidence as to the fate of St. John.

"Hawke and Dom rigged all the choppers with a sort of homing device," Caitlin began.

The pit of Michael's stomach sank. A homing device, no matter how obscure the frequency could still be picked up by someone. His mind began calculating ways to secretly remove the devices from Santini's use, but how to keep him from reinstalling them?

"If it wasn't deactivated within minutes of the chopper powering down, it would automatically send a scrambled microburst location signal to Airwolf. They figured the signal would be so short no one else could pick it up."

_And, they'd be right, especially since no one would know to be listening for the signal._ Secretly impressed Archangel thought of the drawback.

"That finds the chopper, but we have no way of knowing if Hawke is still anywhere near it."

"Oh, they came up with something else for that. Depending on what kind of secondary transport was used after the chopper set down, they figured a way to identify and track it."

"Do I get to know how they were going to do that?" he asked when she didn't elaborate.

"Nope," was Caitlin's all too cheerful answer.

Hawke was definitely rubbing off on her. He thought a change of subject was in order.

"For what it's worth, I'm glad the two of you have gotten together."

"Yeah, I figured especially after you arranged for me to move into the cabin."

"You're mistaken," Michael quickly recovered from his shock. _How had she...?_

"If you'll recall, I advocated protective custody or barring the safe house at least a stay with Stephanie."

"Come on Michael you're too good an agent to think I'd suddenly take you up on that offer. I didn't after the threatening letter. Besides, you practically told me yourself when you put your money on Marella winning the pool."

"Maybe you should take up acting classes again. I think Marella could hone your natural deductive reasoning abilities."

"I don't see Hawke liking that idea too much. You know how he reacted when you offered me a place in Valhalla."

"Yes, well he needn't know," Michael said thinking of the split lip he'd received.

"I won't lie to him Michael. Not now that…"

Whatever else she might have said was interrupted by a beep from his console.

Michael cleared his throat. "I think we're coming up on the chopper…It looks intact."

Caitlin relaxed fractionally when she saw the distinctive red, white, and blue paint job.

"If they landed, they could have just had a mechanical problem. There's no reason to think it's anything more."

"Right," Caitlin said unconvinced as she set Airwolf down close to the other chopper. She made her way over to it and had already typed in a code into a small device under the pilot's seat before Michael joined her.

"What does it look like?"

"I can tell you one thing, Michael." Cait said while rummaging in a compartment. She pulled out a small piece of cloth. She reached as far as possible into the cockpit. Her entire upper half disappeared momentarily through the open door. She let out a syllable of triumph before reemerging the cloth wrapped around something. She showed it to Michael. An empty hypodermic rested in her hand. "It wasn't mechanical failure."

Back in Airwolf, Cait listened as Michael made arrangements for the Santini Air chopper to be returned the airfield.

"Now what?" he asked as he disconnected with the FIRM.

"Type in 'ident trans.'"

"Ident trans? What's that?"

"Identify transmission. After the homing device is shut off with the right code it sends another signal to Airwolf, one that should provide us with a lead as to where they've taken Hawke."

"How will I know when…?" Michael began, "never mind. Cait turn three degrees north. Course laid in.

"Right," Caitlin confirmed. "Let's go get Hawke."

Caitlin hit the turbos and headed toward the nearby mountains.

~~~AW~~~

Hawke awoke with a start, the ropes cutting into his limbs at the movement reminding him of his current plight.

_Great_, he thought, _still tied to a chair._

Since that part of his situation hadn't improved, he began to assess his physical condition. His muscles were cramped from being in the same uncomfortable position for too long. The repeated blows to his abdomen made breathing difficult, and he couldn't open his left eye. It was swollen shut. Add to that the ringing in his ears, and things weren't looking so good. Hawke raised his head and regretted the motion as the room swirled around him in a nauseating kaleidoscope. After several minutes and twice as many steadying breaths, he gazed through the wire mesh window of his cage.

The man he knew as Chad Carter was arguing with someone else. He strained to hear what was being said past the ringing in his ears.

"You're being paid well enough," Carter said.

"I didn't sign on to kill a guy," someone else said in a pleading whine. "I can't be a party to that. I can't go back to prison."

"Relax; it will never come to that. I told you our friend just wants to pay him back for getting between him and some girl."

"Yeah, then why does he insist on being armed to the teeth? Have you seen that helicopter? It has missiles!"

"Yeah, apparently, this guy has some dangerous friends."

"I just thought he did stunts and gave flying lessons. If those friends show up, they'll shoot first and ask questions later. I'm getting out now. If you know what's good, you'll do the same."

Hawke heard a door slam.

"Wait, you can't leave now." Carter followed the other out.

Hawke tried to make sense of what he'd heard.

_What was Carter doing? Why would he lie to the help about his role in things? Why create a mysterious friend? Or who was this mysterious friend?_

He shook his head to clear the fog. The effort was rewarded with another wave of nausea. Bile rose in his throat and only great effort kept it from escaping.

_Note to self, no sudden motions with the head. Now, how do I get out of here…?_

Carter strolled through the door and into Hawke's cell minutes later.

"Having trouble with the help?" Hawke taunted.

Carter smiled. "It merely pushes my plans up a bit."

Hawke hoped that by taunting him he could get Carter to hit him again. The close quarters might give him the opportunity to grab the gun stuffed into Carter's belt.

"You know Hawke you are one stubborn man. Don't you know by now your brother is dead?"

He waited a moment for a reaction. "Well no matter, you'll soon be joining him."

Hawke's eyes narrowed to slits as his jaw tensed. Carter drew the gun from his waist.

"Any last words, Hawke? I have a date with a certain red head we've both had the pleasure of…shall we say _knowing._"

A muscle along Hawke's jaw twitched as the two men glared at each other. Hawke tilted his head and gave the other man a smirk.

"Sounds like you'll be seeing Cait sooner than you thought."

A moment later Carter heard Airwolf's howl for himself, he smiled again.

"Great, she'll be just in time to see you die." Carter pointed the gun and shot.

Hawke felt the sting and knew it was bad. He'd been hit in the abdomen. If he didn't get medical attention in time, he'd bleed out.

Carter took the two steps that separated them and leaned in. "Be sure to give Cait my regards," he said before turning and leaving the room.

~~~AW~~~

Airwolf threaded through a narrow canyon. Red sand stone walls towered on either side. Michael marveled at the skill at which Cait maneuvered the helicopter. He may have been more than annoyed when Hawke and Dom brought her on board, but she really was quite skilled.

"Cait we're coming up on a small building. It is right up against the canyon wall with a truck parked beside it. There appears to be two rooms. Two life signs in the back room," Michael informed.

"Are there any signs of defenses?"

"Not that I can tell, I'm not sure the scans are penetrating the canyon walls though."

"Well, we'll just have to go in and see. Combat mode."

The ADF pods lowered and the chain guns deployed.

"Cait someone's running from the building."

"Give me an id."

Airwolf's computers scanned through faces and pulled up that of Chris Collins.

"Chris Collins, millionaire, has contacts with half a dozen film studios. His parents were actors."

"Yeah," Cait said, "that's the name he gave. But now that I've had time to think about, I know it was Chad Carter. There was just something off about how he acted around me. If he's running then Hawke must be in that building."

Cait pushed the button for the chain guns to try and cut 'Collins' off. Bullets tore up the ground behind him. He made for a cave in the canyon wall.

"I've lost him in the cave, Cait."

"He's not going anywhere," she said coldly. She swung Airwolf around and targeted the pickup truck beside the building. She shot at it until a bullet hit the fuel tank and it exploded. Rotating Airwolf again to face the mouth of the cave she lowered the landing gear.

"Go get Hawke," Cait commanded.

Michael left Airwolf and made his way toward the building while Cait guarded the entrance to the cave. Even though, there was only one life sign left inside he couldn't be certain it was Hawke. He leaned against the building careful to avoid the window. He risked a quick look, but couldn't make out anything through the dusty glass. Michael's pulse quickened as he prepared to open the door. Oh how he missed field work. Grasping the handle securely he turned the knob and pushed the door. He heard a cough from inside and dove through the door seeking cover at the wall which separated the two rooms. He took a deep breath before looking through the mesh that formed the upper half of the wall.

"You gonna hide out there all day or cut me loose at some point," Hawke growled through the pain.

"Hello to you too, Hawke," Michael said. He took his time standing knowing that Hawke rarely _asked_ for help. He stowed his gun and straightened his flight suit before entering the cell.

"Sometime today, Michael," Hawke bit out.

Michael was about to retort when he saw the blood seeping into Hawke's shirt.

"You've been hit."

"And shot. Now cut me out of this chair so we can leave this hell hole. I ready to check out."

Michael pulled out a knife and cut the ropes binding Hawke to the chair before moving to his ankles.

As soon as his hands were free, Hawke pressed them to the sticky hole near his side. He winced at the pain it caused.

"Can you make it," Michael asked when he'd finished cutting Hawke loose.

Hawke lifted determined eyes from his bloody side. "I'll have to," he grunted knowing that Michael couldn't very well carry him.

Michael helped Hawke to his feet.

Hawke stepped haltingly to the door frame. He leaned against it thankfully.

"Maybe, I should have brought my cane," Michael taunted.

"I'm fine."

Hawke made it halfway to the outer door when Michael was suddenly at his side supporting him. Hawke unwillingly leaned on him. He didn't want Cait to worry. By the time they got to the door, he was grateful for Michael's support.

"Wait," Hawke stopped them in the doorway. He tilted his head toward the canyon with the cave. A black painted helicopter flew over the canyon wall. It opened fire on Airwolf before flying over.

Airwolf rose from the ground in pursuit. She fired a warning at the helicopter.

"I'm not letting you get away. You're going to prison for a long time for what you've done. Now land," Cait demanded.

"Ah Caitey," came Chad Carter's voice over the radio. "While you're out chasing my helicopter time's running out for your precious Hawke. I left him with a little present. If you go back now, you might even have time to say goodbye which is more than you gave me with CC."

"Set that chopper down now."

"I don't think we'll do that Caitey."

The chopper in front of her ducked down into another canyon. Airwolf followed only to lose sight of the chopper. The black chopper popped up behind her and fired one of its missiles.

"I don't have time for this," she said as she evaded. The missile impacted the sand stone walls creating a multihued landslide of debris.

Cait turned midair to face the oncoming chopper.

"Come on guys, I don't want ah have to hurt you."

They fired at her again. On instinct, she returned fire even knowing their rounds couldn't damage Airwolf's armor.

Her 50 calibers hit their rotors.

The black helicopter went into a spiral and hit the canyon wall. The rotors sheared tilting the body into the wall. As the cockpit impacted the whole thing was engulfed in a fireball.

Cait looked on in shock for a moment. She hadn't wanted to kill anyone.

Airwolf rose beyond the canyon and raced back to Hawke. She couldn't dwell. She'd have to deal with killing people later. For now, she hoped she wasn't too late to save Hawke.


	28. Chapter 28

Silent tears streaked down freckled cheeks as Airwolf's rotors slowly came to a stop. Caitlin had held it together during the flight to the FIRM's hospital. She'd held back the tears and put on the mask of grim determination when Michael had suggested she could accompany Hawke. She knew she couldn't. She didn't lie to herself despite Michael's assurances. Hawke had lost so much blood he'd lost consciousness. His skin had been ashen when the doctors and nurses had wheeled him away. She knew he might not make it. If he didn't, he wouldn't want the FIRM to get their hands on Airwolf. If he did make it, then he damn sure wouldn't want them to have Airwolf. That had meant one thing she had had to leave him. She held the tears back while flying to the lair, held them until after she descended down the funnel.

Caitlin removed her helmet and swiped futilely at her cheeks. Now that they'd started she couldn't hold them back any longer.

"Oh Hawke," she sobbed into the silence. "You've got to make it. You've…got to."

After several minutes she exited the helicopter and changed clothes. She made her way to the Santini Air jeep and put the key in the ignition. Before starting it she looked back at the helicopter before her.

_Airwolf_. The reason she'd followed Hawke to California after their auspicious meeting. Oh, she'd instantly been attracted to him. After all she is a woman and he's…well…hot. But, he'd been in jail at the time, and then there was the sheriff, and cowboys intent on abuse, and…Airwolf.

Since getting to know Hawke, it had been less about maybe flying his helicopter and more and more about him. She'd known for a long time that she was in love with him. Had hoped, and then given up, and hoped again. Finally they'd gotten past the barriers between them and become lovers. And she was happy. She was. Just…she never thought it would be so hard.

She never thought that after Carl she'd give all her heart to someone again. As his disappearance had dragged on, she knew he had to be dead. She had come to terms with it years before his remains had been discovered. And, even though, she'd moved on with her life, dated, even became serious with a couple of guys, she'd always held back a part. She'd kept a deep down place that was her core of indestructability, the place she could retreat to be okay and meet life head on again.

Hawke had destroyed that in her. Quite unintentionally, she was sure. Caitlin gave him all of her heart before she even realized it. He could hurt her or give her immense joy with just a simple gesture or phrase. Maybe it was because they had both needed that place deep down that had drawn her to him. She recognized it in him and thought that if maybe she could reach him he would do the same for her.

He had reached her and more. She had reached him. They had carved out a life together that suited them both. But now with the thought of losing him, she knew it wasn't enough. She wanted more. She wanted the commitment the covenant of life long.

Hawke always keeps his promises. Caitlin needed him to promise her.

~~~AW~~~

Dominic Santini threw up his hands in frustration.

"How, I ask you? How? Why, I can't leave you alone for even a week without one of you getting yourself into trouble. And, you should know better than going up against the bad guys without me."

Hawke raised an eyebrow as Dom turned away from hospital bed and started to emphasize his points to Cait.

"I started flying before either of you were born." He slapped the back of his right hand into to his left at the end of each sentence. "I have more combat experience than the both of you combined. I've logged more hours at the EDCC than the both of you combined. And, I came up with the tracking device idea."

"Yes sir, Dom," Cait interrupted. "There just wasn't time to call you back before Hawke was grabbed."

"You still should have let me know when he got to the hospital. I could have come back early from that charter. I could have been here to...uh…to…"

"Cait pretty much took care of it, Dom," Hawke said in a matter of fact way. His blue eyes caught hers in a look of pride.

"Besides," Cait chipped in. The smile she'd been trying to hide making its way to her lips. "You were the one who always says 'a job is a job, and we do a good one.' You wouldn't want to let your clients down now would you?"

"Well, I wouldn't…"

Hawke grinned. He knew Cait could talk circles around Dom.

"Of course you wouldn't, Dom. Hawke was in no shape to call you and I was kind of busy worrying about him. He lost an awful lot of blood, slept most of the time, and is still pretty weak. All you could have done here was worry too and that's no way to spend a week, cooped up in a hospital on hard seats and getting' no rest."

"Well, I could have…"

Convinced she'd talked around Dom's frustration long enough for him to be in a better mood. Cait decided to enlist his help and divert him to another topic. "Anyway since you're here now you can help me get him back to the cabin. He's convinced he doesn't need any help getting up there despite the doctors warnings."

"Now String she's right. The doctors said it might take a while for you to get your strength back."

"I'll be fine." He scowled at Cait, the grin from Dom's grousing completely forgotten.

The door opened and Archangel stepped through.

"Well, I see the patient is back to his jovial self." He grinned at Hawke's lowered brows and petulant glare. "He must be getting released today to be so pleasant."

"Michael, I'm not in the mood. What do you want?"

"Can't I visit the wounded?" He glanced at Dom and Cait. His eyes lingering on Cait with the word wounded.

"You don't make social calls." Hawke kept his eyes on Michael assessing the glance and the intensity of his eyes, the tilt of his shoulder.

Hawke swung his legs over the side of the bed and shoved his feet into the slippers there.

"I was just on my way out," he said with finality.

"Uh, I'll just go bring the jeep around. Cait why don't you make sure those release papers are in order," Dom said recognizing a showdown when he saw one.

Dom and Cait beat a hasty retreat.

Michael waited until Hawke made his way slowly to the door before he spoke quietly.

"Hawke wait. It's about Chad Carter."

Hawke froze with his hand on the pull to the door. He turned around.

"He's not dead. He wasn't in the chopper when Cait shot it down. The dental records matched the real Chris Collins."

Blue eyes searched for truth in the one returning his gaze.

"We'll continue to search for him. We've got enough on his father to put him in prison for a long time. He won't have a support network. We've frozen all the family's assets. Carter's running. He's bound to make a mistake. We'll get him Hawke."

"You know Michael that's the same thing you said about Horn. I'm still looking over my shoulder. You don't seem to have a very good track record finding missing persons."

Michael knew Hawke was referring to more than just Horn. The still very solid wall he kept trying to blast through for information on St. John rankled.

"We can put protection on Cait…"

"Don't tell Cait anything."

"But, Hawke…"

"No, Michael! You know she won't go for it anyway. She doesn't want to live her life in fear. This way she doesn't have to."

Michael conceded the truth of that. His previous attempts at getting her to accept protective custody had been met with adamant refusals.

Hawke closed his eyes a moment and took a deep breath. Something was different with Cait. Ever since he'd awakened in the hospital, she'd been…distant. He couldn't quite put his finger on it. Oh, she tried to hide it. At first he thought he could be wrong, he'd shrugged it off as her worry over his close call. But, he couldn't deny the odd look he saw in her eyes frequently. She would quickly cover and return to her normally chipper self, but…. Maybe her first combat kill had affected her more than she let on.

"I'll just have to watch her a little more closely."

"Even you can't be there 24/7."

"Just catch Carter! We'll muddle through like we always do. Besides, I've been working on a few surprises out at the cabin," Hawke said with an enigmatic grin.

Michael tilted his head curious.

"You know how I just _love_ unexpected company." Hawke opened the door to shuffle down the hall to the nurse's station where he was met by Cait and a husky orderly with a wheel chair.


	29. Chapter 29

"What the…" Michael looked down in shock at the red dot shining on the lapel of his pristine white suit. Marella pushed him back into the helicopter slamming the door then dove for cover herself. They warily viewed the bushes and trees between them and their objective.

"Wait here Sir. I'll check things out," she hissed.

"I'm not some rookie," he snapped back. "I'll go to the right. You…."

"Excuse me, Sir, but the only reason you're not dead right now is because I pushed you out of the way. You've clearly been targeted. I'm in a much better position to assess the situation especially since you're the one sporting the laser sight."

Michael grudgingly acknowledged the truth of her statement.

"You have ten minutes."

She moved with stealth away from the helicopter and disappeared into the trees as Michael grudgingly acknowledged the truth of her statement.

Marella darted from tree to tree slowly moving ever closer to her target. It was fortunate she'd been to this location on many occasions though never having been targeted in such a way as this. She knew all the exits, the lines of sight, and knew where and when the most exposure would occur before obtaining the objective. Failure was not an option, not with everything that this location represented.

Adrenaline pumped through her veins as she crept to the back exit. Surprise briefly flickered as she noted the recent felling of a couple of trees. She had intended to hide her approach. Now, she'd have to make a longer dash to the back entrance than she had anticipated. Still she would not be dissuaded from her goal.

Marella's eyes narrowed as she reassessed the situation. Security had been tightened. Had something happened to put the occupants on alert? The trees had obviously been cut several days before. Neat stacks of split logs lined the porch on both sides of the back door. They served a dual purpose of providing handy firewood and creating an extra layer of insulation. They would handily absorb the impact of even high speed armor piercing rounds. Come to think of it, she had noticed a few subtle differences on her approach and shutdown before exiting the helicopter.

Double checking the open space and mentally calculating her trajectory, all her senses on alert, she shot through the clearing and threw herself silently onto the porch. Inching her way along the rough-hewn logs and careful to avoid the windows, her hand finally rested on the door knob. Quickly she glanced through the glass in the door. No one was visible making her task of infiltrating the space both easier and more difficult. Not knowing where the occupants were meant she'd have to draw on all her training to get in without being caught.

Marella crouched low and turned the knob.

As soon as her head poked through the opening, she felt the cold hard muzzle of a M1911A press against her temple. Her eyes darted to the man wielding the weapon as she lowered her own.

"Hawke," she said striving for a cool detached tone and forcing herself not to swallow hard.

She grudgingly respected the man. He could be a decent ally at times, but was a formidable opponent. The problem was in determining which he was at any given moment. The steely gaze leveled at her now gave nothing of his motives away. He seemed to be on edge. The fact that he was fully dressed meant she hadn't interrupted any romantic situation. She knew from previous visits the mood that caused in the taciturn pilot. Speaking of which, she could really use the calming influence the fiery red headed second occupant of the cabin usually wielded over Hawke though he would deny it with one of his patented glares if confronted with the concept.

She risked breaking eye contact to sweep the open floor plan of the cabin and listened for signs of other occupants.

"Where's Cait," she asked as once again her eyes met his.

Hawke's eyes softened and he frowned slightly before thumbing on the safety and lowering his gun.

"She taking a bath," he said slightly annoyed as he led the way into the cabin and stepped behind the bar.

"Sorry to interrupt," she said wondering at his tone. On a good day, he could be almost cordial. Apparently today wasn't a good day.

"Yeah, right," Hawke rejoined in disbelief as he poured two glasses of wine.

Marella took one glass and began to sip it as Hawke glared at her then pointedly poured another.

"Is everything okay? The laser sights gave us a start."

Hawke quirked one side of his mouth up, merriment shown in his eyes.

"That's what you get when you show up uninvited."

"If we waited on an invitation, we'd never see the cabin again."

Hawke's smile grew wider.

Marella shook her head at his expression.

"I'd better give Michael the all clear."

Hawke's hand shot out to grab her wrist and stop her from sliding off the bar stool.

"Let him figure it out for himself."

"Hawke," she said in warning.

Hawke released her wrist.

"If it takes him longer than twenty minutes, then go."

She debated within herself for a moment then acquiesced. "Okay, but it's your head."

"Somehow it always is."

"I bet you he'll be in here in less than five."

"You're on."

Hawke tilted his head toward the loft above him.

"Join us for dessert Marella?"

"Sure I could go for something sweet."

She followed him toward the kitchen as Caitlin descended the stairs.

"Marella," Cait said shaking her head slightly to loosen the hold of the lightly damp tendrils of hair plastered to her neck. "It's good to see you. Where's Michael?"

"Wondering about the welcoming committee," Hawke said as he handed her a slice of chocolate cake.

"Hawke," she admonished. "Are you gonna let him sit out there all night?"

"Nah, Marella will go get him if he's not in her in twenty minutes." He handed her a fork and they all headed for the seating area around the heart. Hawke snagged the wine he poured for them both on the way.

Marella noted the intimate arrangement of cushions by the fire. Maybe she had interrupted some plans after all. She was surprised to see Cait forgo the cozy setting to instead plop herself down on one end of the sofa.

Hawke frowned at finding Cait on the sofa. He handed her the glass of wine.

Caitlin quickly took a sip to hide the mischief in her eyes. She had started a subtle campaign against Hawke ever since he'd been shot in the side by Chad. Caitlin decided the best way to get Hawke to admit how much he needed and wanted her in his life was to make him work to get her attention like she had for almost two years. Lately, he'd been working overtime trying to create romance in the little things, like having dessert. She pretended cluelessness over his resultant frustrations. Cait wasn't really happy turning the tables on Hawke, but she had a goal in mind. He needed to take the next step in their relationship. She needed him to commit to life-long however long that life may be. She needed him to start living again, and part of living was hope in a future not just the sorrows of the past and the fleeting happiness of the here and now.

Caitlin sighed when Hawke sat as close to her as possible without putting his arm around her. She shifted away slightly garnering another slight frown from Hawke. The small space opened like a gulf between them. Cait wondered if she should just tell him what she wanted from him. She dismissed that idea. It had to be his decision. He had to even think it was his idea Hawke never like it when he felt forced into anything. When faced with the prospect of her leaving, it had still taken the trauma of her almost dying for him to ask her to stay. Hopefully they wouldn't have to go through something like that again to push him to want to marry her. Hell who was she kidding, this was Hawke. They'd been together for months now and he still hadn't told her he loved her. She'd probably have to be on death's door before he admitted it.

Pushing away those depressing thoughts she decided to address another issue.

"So, not that it isn't great to see you, Marella, but what brings you here?"

"Well…" she began as the front door burst open.

"Damn," Hawke groused as Michael entered.

"Isn't this cozy." In full blown Archangel mode, Michael Coldsmith-Briggs III strode over to the other three.

"Right on time Sir," Marella gloated relinquishing her chair, wine, and cake to her boss.

"You couldn't have waited one more minute," Hawke grumbled.

A sense of satisfaction settled over Michael's features and the irritation and anger at Hawke's little joke dissipated. He had the sense that Hawke had lost in a contest on how long it would take him to join the group. A glance at the beaming smile on Marella's face confirmed his suspicions.

Caitlin hated to spoil the moment of Michael's triumph, but she had certain designs for this evening that their arrival had put on hold.

"Marella was just about to tell us what brings you here," she prodded.

Michael ran a finger over his mustache and observed the couple in front of him a moment. He took a deep breathe tried the circuitous route.

"Hawke, that matter we discussed a while back," he said cryptically. "I have a lead. I thought you would like to take care of it post haste."

Hawke raised his eyebrow at the lack of specifics.

"We've discussed a lot of things, Michael. Want to be more specific?"

Michael glanced at Caitlin then back to Hawke.

"It involves certain…hard to find…adversaries."

Hawke stiffened making the connection. He stood and walked to the fire his back to the others.

"What adversaries," Cait questioned.

"Michael," Hawke said as he turned toward them. "Why don't we discuss this outside?"

Cait stood up. She had the sinking suspicion that they were trying to keep something from her. The closed hardened expression on Hawke face added fuel to her theories.

"Just what is it you don't want me to know Hawke?" Her eyes searched his for some clue as he turned to her.

"This doesn't concern you Cait."

She knew he was lying. The twitching muscle in his clenched jaw was a dead giveaway.

"In case you've forgotten we're in this together now. If it concerns you, it concerns me."

"I'll take care of it."

His mask was firmly in place. She couldn't read him. It was as if the time they'd spent living together, the time they'd know each other hadn't happened. She thought she had made headway into the fortress that was Stringfellow Hawke, but looking at him now….

"I wanted to tell her then Hawke." Michael's voice broke the bubble they seemed to be in.

Finding a more appropriate target, Hawke rounded on Michael. "Don't," he warned.

"Tell me what Michael?"

"Chad Carter's alive."

Hawke took an angry step toward Michael clenching his fists as the color drained from Cait's face. She stopped Hawke mid-stride.

"Y-you…you let me think I killed him," she accused Hawke. She didn't like killing. She knew it was sometimes necessary in their line of work. And, she would do it when she had to in order to protect herself or those she loved, but she didn't like it. "How long have you known he was alive?"

"Since the hospital," Michael supplied.

"Three months!"

Hawke winced at the volume of her voice.

"You've known for three months and you didn't tell me."

Hawke hadn't seen Caitlin this mad since she'd come to the cabin to call him out for how'd he'd been treating Dom in the aftermath of her first encounter with CC and Chad. But, worse than the anger was the growing hurt he could see.

Caitlin thought about his attempts to console and comfort her while she dealt with the knowledge she'd killed two people in that helicopter that day. If Chad hadn't been one of them then who had the other body belonged to? Suddenly she straightened her back turned on her heel and walked forcibly from the cabin.

Marella silently applauded Caitlin. Michael watched Hawke warily. The pilot stood rigidly clenching and unclenching his fists.

Michael stood from his chair. He'd been on the receiving end of Hawke's fist more than once and didn't wish to repeat the experience.

"Marella will leave the file," Michael said as he headed for the door.

Marella unbuttoned the jacket of her white flight suit and retrieved the file concealed there. She placed it on the table before following Michael out the door.

The sound of rotors picking up momentum broke through Hawke's struggle to maintain control. He walked to the door to see the white helicopter lift off from the dock and wondered how much trouble he would be in if next time they paid an unannounced visit he didn't disconnect the artillery attached to the laser sights he'd installed.


	30. Chapter 30

I've been working hard to end this fic, but it keeps taking on a life of its own. Plus I like happy endings, this one doesn't seem to want to provide one. So I keep trying. Right now I'm looking into something bittersweet. A brief thanks to all who have enjoyed so far.

~~~AW~~~

Caitlin seethed as she walked along the rugged paths that crisscrossed the dense forest that surrounded Hawke's cabin. She wasn't even sure where she was headed. She just knew she had to get out of there before she said or did something that would end her relationship with Hawke forever.

He could just be so infuriating. She was an adult. Hadn't she proven she could take care of herself? Hadn't she saved not only herself but him as well on multiple occasions? How dare he withhold vital information from her! How dare he coddle her!

She'd thought they had moved passed all that. She'd thought he trusted and respected her, especially now that they were together.

Caitlin stumbled over a gnarled -root that had escaped the confines of rich soil long ago. She scrambled to catch herself before she fell, but landed hard on her hands and knees despite her best efforts. Smarting from the sting to her palms she rocked back and rubbed them vigorously down her jeans.

_Damn! Why does he have to be so…so…overprotective!_

Caitlin sat there breathing hard letting her anger pour out until she felt the cold ground seep past her jeans and into her legs. She shivered involuntarily.

She knew why he was overprotective. He'd dealt with personal loss time and again. Dom had told her the condensed version of String's life of loss after she'd made a comment about him being 'hurt real bad.' It was part of the reason she'd become Hawke's best gal pal.

Drained of anger, she stood slowly and stretched out the kinks the cold had created. She wasn't quite ready to return to the cabin, so decided to head for the secluded nature blind on the side of the mountain. Maybe the serene surroundings would prepare her to deal with Hawke.

~~~AW~~~

Hawke leaned heavily on the wooden railing Tet resting at his feet. He was worried. Michael and Marilla had left hours ago and Caitlin hadn't returned. He was torn between trying to go find her in the increasing darkness and leaving her to cool down. She'd been so mad when she'd stormed out of the cabin. The anger he could deal with, the hurt on the other hand…. He'd seen it in her eyes right before she turned and left. He was worried that he'd hurt her too much this time.

Caitlin had struck a chord from the moment he met her. He had been drawn to her genuine nature, her wide eyed enthusiasm, and the fact that she seemed more interested in Airwolf than in him. He knew his effect on women and though he enjoyed the occasional distraction they provided, he preferred a challenge and tired of the many blatant attempts to get him into bed. Caitlin had a sense of naivety about her. She flirted but with an innocence that made her all the more endearing.

Their first kiss had been just a little too enjoyable given the circumstances and then she'd been targeted by Holly. He'd pushed her firmly into the friend category and left her there for almost two years. He'd seen her developing deeper feelings and deliberately squashed any intimacy between them, usually by finding a date for a few weeks. He had known he was hurting her, but as he came to depend on her unfailing friendship, he couldn't risk losing her by anything deeper happening between them. Then despite his attempts at pushing her away, they'd finally gotten together anyway.

And now…now he'd gone and hurt her again. He didn't know by how much, but the longer she stayed gone…. He clenched his jaw. _And, what's with that anyway? She walked out. She never walks out. She always wants to 'talk it out, so it won't become something bigger than what we think it is.' I'm always the one who walks out so I don't say something I'll regret later._

The thought stopped him cold. Was that why she had walked away, had he pushed her that far?

He'd only been trying to protect her. Why couldn't she see that? She always told him she wouldn't live her life in fear. But he knew with Chad out there alive, she would be afraid. He didn't want to see that in her. He wanted to keep her safe from the worry and vigilance that had been his constant companions for more years than he cared to admit. He wanted to keep her safe. But, did the not knowing about the danger keep her safe? As the night grew colder, he came to a decision. He was prepared to talk. He didn't want to lose her and if that meant discussing his own fears…then so be it.

Tet twisted his head sharply to the left peering into the woods. A moment later he was satisfied with whatever he'd heard and stretched before heading back into the cabin. Hawke listened and before long heard the soft rustle of leaves as they were brushed by light footsteps. Caitlin, he let out a long breath. He relaxed against the post hoping for nonchalance while trying to gage the mood of the approaching woman.

~~~AW~~~

"She wouldn't even look at me, Dom," String said as he handed Dom a wrench.

Dom just grunted from his position under the helicopter he was working on. He knew something was up when Sting and Cait had come in that morning. Cait was cheerful as always to Dom, but noticeably cooler toward String.

"She didn't talk to me all weekend, and every time I went to touch her she'd sidestep. At first, I just thought she was still mad. But, two days without a word, that's just not Cait."

"Unh huh," Dom said. "She seems to be talking to you now."

"Only because I told her how childish she was being."

Dom rolled his eyes. "I'm sure that went over well. What did she say?"

_**Flashback**_

Cait stopped on the top porch step. They were just about to leave for the hangar. She turned around deliberately to face Hawke. She tried not to let on that his words had peeved her.

In cool clipped tones, she said, "Well I just thought that if you were going to treat me like a child, then maybe I should act like one. Besides, I was just doing what you do every time we have an argument. Only I can last a lot longer than you," having said that she turned and continued toward the waiting helicopter.

_**End flashback**_

"Look, it doesn't matter," Hawke said hastily. "I just need you to talk to her. Make her see that I was just trying to keep her safe."

Dom pushed out from under the chopper. "Oh no, String you're not dragging me into this. Besides she talks to me just fine." He grinned smugly while wiping his hands on a grease rag.

"Come on Dom," Hawke pleaded. "I really need your help this time. She'd started pulling away before this, and now…." Hawke paced a few feet away before turning back and running an agitated hand through his hair.

Dom studied his young friend a moment. He noticed the tension in String's demeanor. He saw a brief flash of desperation in String's eyes.

Dom had known String since he was born. He'd witnessed the shy sensitive kid grow into a cocky teenager. The teenager turned into a young man hurting from loss following his brother to Viet Nam. He had returned a broken but driven man. Since Cait had come along Dom had seen String change again. Oh, he was still driven to find his brother, but even before he and Cait became more than friends, String had begun to heal. String smiled more, laughed more, and came down from his mountain more.

Now Dom could see how worried String really was. Caitlin had become his ray of hope in the darkness. She was more important to him than playing his cello while watching the eagle soar. She reminded him of life and love when everything else went wrong. She was his anchor and if he lost that….

"Ah Kid. You know she loves you. Just look at all she put up with just so you two could get together. You're lucky she's more stubborn than you are. You pushed her a lot. I tell you what, a couple of times I thought she was ready to pack up and head back to Texas."

The desperate look returned to String's eyes again.

"What if she's finally had enough, Dom? What if I lose her?"

Dom placed a hand on String's shoulder and let out a sigh.

"String, as long as you know she loves you, and she knows you love her, the two of you'll work it out. You just need to make sure she knows."

"Yeah," String said as he contemplated just how to bridge the gap with Cait.

"Hawke, Dom, Michael just called. He has a lead on Chad," Caitlin called across the hangar.

Both men looked up. Hawke and Cait's eyes met and held. She saw worry and a touch of fear in his. All he saw in hers was determination.

~~~AW~~~

The silence from the front of the cockpit was deafening. The fight over Cait's inclusion in this mission had been swift and decisive. Dom tweaked the air intakes for the turbines for what had to be the hundredth time. He was trying his level best not to butt into their business. He didn't want it all to end. He loved Caitlin like a daughter and hoped from the moment she showed up in Van Nuys that String would find her as more than a pleasant distraction. As time went on that hope had gone through the wringer and back again. If his boy could just let go of his fear a little, Dom knew that Cait could make him happier than he'd ever been. Dom let out a heavy sigh.

"You want to check for a pressure leak back there, Dom."

"Sure thing, String…huh?"

"Well, that's the tenth time I've heard air escaping in as many minutes." There was only a hint of humor in the statement.

"Humph."

String shifted in his seat. He was wound tight and only part of it had to do with the mission to take care of Chad Carter. Ostensibly they were supposed to capture him, but deep down String knew it could only end one way. "If you've got something to say, just say it."

"I don't want to meddle."

"Since when?"

"Since it doesn't matter what I say, I'm gonna make one or both of you mad."

"You might as well, Dom. We're both already mad. And I, for one am tired of fighting," Cait spoke for the first time since sitting in the left front seat, strapping herself in, and refusing to budge.

Her defeated tone caused Hawke to glance her way. His gut clenched. From the little of her face he could see under the helmet she wore, he could tell she'd been crying. She hadn't made a sound. His shoulders slumped first at the thought that he'd made her cry and then at the knowledge that she was giving up on them, on him.

Dom heard the underlying meaning in Cait's words and took a deep breath.

"Okay. Here goes," he began. "First of all String, how can you be so pig headed and stubborn where Cait is concerned? I thought I taught you better than that. Cait's an adult. She can make her own decisions. And beyond that she's a lady and should be treated as such. Granted she's a feisty, stubborn pain, sticking her nose into other people's business lady, but she only does it because she cares. And, you can't deny she's just the kind of woman that can hold her own against you. You need that even if you won't admit how much. And Cait, we all know how capable you are. We know your training. It's just that we're more experienced in this combat and espionage thing. And, rather you like it or not, we always will be. It gets dangerous and sometimes things can spiral out of anyone's control. Any one of us could get kill. You're more resilient. It'd hurt but you out of all of us would be able to adapt and overcome."

"Gee Dom you make me sound like a Marine," Cait tried to lighten the mood.

"I'm not finished missy," Dom continued. "I know you know why String's overprotective even if he doesn't say it. If he can prevent it, he'll keep you out of harm's way. He will even go so far as to try and keep you from being changed…hardened by this life you've chosen to get involved in. If that means he keeps some things from you…well, you just have to understand…at least until he can get over it and realize you either need to grow together or you'll just end up growing apart.

Silence reigned in the cockpit for a moment before Dom continued in a much more subdued voice.

"I'm not going to be around forever String. I'd kind of like to know you had someone to watch out for you when I'm gone. Cait has the fortitude to do it." Dom gathered his breath for one more statement. "So, get your head out of your six and fix things. That's all I've got to say on the subject."

The last hour of the journey to the same Caribbean island that they'd tried to capture CC at over seven long months ago was made in total silence each person thinking about what lay ahead of them during this mission and beyond.

~~~AW~~~

How things went downhill so fast was something none of them could have predicted. They'd reached the island to find that it had been heavily fortified since the last time they were there. They'd spent the first thirty minutes taking out various machine gun nests, armored Jeeps, and a few rocket launchers.

When Hawke finally set down to conduct a ground search for Chad Carter, Cait had refused to stay with Airwolf. In fact she was the one who found Chad first. He'd been disguised as a servant in the household, but something about his tone when he spoke broken English telling them where the master of the house had fled set her teeth on edge. She had cornered him before Hawke realized she'd turned back to the fleeing servants. Hawke had heard there brief exchange as Cait coolly proclaimed her intention to shoot him right there. He'd rounded the corner just in time to see a man from behind whack her in the head. He shot the man without a second thought as he rushed to her side. Checking her pulse he turned to see Chad running down the hall. Hawke debated for a split second before he rushed after Chad.

Somehow Chad doubled back and dragged Cait into one of the bedrooms. He'd ripped most of her Airwolf uniform from the front of her body before Hawke had found the locked room and began to try and break down the door. Chad grabbed Cait up and backed into the corner as Hawke burst through the door.

"Let the girl go Carter, or I swear to you there won't be a rock big enough for you crawl under."

"Oh come on Hawke, I can see it in your eyes. You wouldn't risk hurting you precious Cait."  
>He jabbed the gun more snugly under her ribs and shifted his grip slightly as Cait's began to come around. Seeing the subtle change in Hawke as he tensed for a strike, Chad took Cait's lips in a brutal kiss.<p>

"Maybe I'll make you watch this time," he said as he broke away. "It would be so much more satisfying that way."

Hawke knew he had to act fast. Cait was starting to rouse from the blow to her head. He knew she'd soon be fighting with all her might throwing any chance at a clean shot out the window.

"Drop your gun. If you don't I guarantee she'll die slowly." Chad shifted the gun to point to Cait's hip ensuring a shot would shatter her pelvis and travel down through her leg.

Hawke's eyes narrowed to slits as he focused on Carter.

Everything seemed to be going in slow motion as Cait blinked bleary eyes. She saw Hawke before her, gun pointed to her right at the same time she became aware of the vice like grip around her waist and the painful jab of the gun barrel near her appendix. Their backs were to the wall which left little room for maneuverability.

Cait tried to push the fog from her mind and come up with something, anything that would end this situation. She knew Hawke wouldn't shoot as long as Chad could pull the trigger in reaction. She also knew that Chad was obsessed. He had to have lost what little rational thought he had left to try and attack her while everything was blowing up around him. He would never cease to be a threat to her. One way or another it had to end now. She looked at Hawke with apology written all over her face as she prepared to move.

"Caitlin!" Hawke yelled just as she moved.

Two shots fired almost simultaneously.


	31. Chapter 31

It's finally completed. Thanks to all who read and reviewed. I struggled with this ending. After reading the reviews the ending took many wild tangents in my mind. I even contemplated writing three ends (1: happily ever after, 2: bittersweet, 3: horrible death and continued angst) where you could pick which you liked the best. I wanted our favorite pair to elope in Las Vegas, Cait not being able to have kids because of her injury, or Caitlin dead and Hawke a mess. At one point it was going to end with a shower scene involving Caitlin and Saint John, thank you very much Robert Nielsen. After re-working it to try and get the ending I wanted, darn those muses who have their own way, it ended like this. I'm not happy with it and feel like I copped out, but oh well.

~~~AW~~~

Hawke saw the sudden focus and clarity in Caitlin's eyes. He tensed as he saw her resolve forming. She gave him a look of sorrow and sympathy.

Her name was ripped from his lips in a cry of anguish as he pulled the trigger. He had to shoot. It didn't matter anymore if Chad pulled the trigger in reflex. Cait's actions would ensure that outcome no matter what he did.

The look of shock in the vacant brown eyes one slightly higher than the other froze on Chad's face.

Hawke watched as the bullet neatly entered Chad's head and sprayed the wall behind with things he didn't care to think about while somehow registering the rapport of the second bullet.

He closed his eyes on in an instant unwilling to see the damage to Cait.

Caitlin. Why did he waste so much time with her? Why didn't he do everything possible to show her his feelings? Why did he let his foolish pride and fear stop him from telling her how much he loved her?

"Oh," Caitlin's long drawn out moan snapped Hawke out of self-recrimination. He rushed to her side as she struggled to disentangle herself from the dead man who'd held her.

"Caitlin?" The one word held fear, regret, and resolve all wrapped within a thin veil of hope. Hawke knelt beside her yearning to reach out to her, hold her, and afraid of what he'd find if he did.

"Hawke, I'm…sorry," she sputtered.

He grabbed her up in his arms resolutely ignoring the spreading blood stain near her pelvis.

"Don't worry Baby," he breathed barely able to speak. "We'll get you to a hospital. You'll be okay, Caitlin. You'll be okay." His voice cracked on the urgent plea.

She placed her arms around his neck as he gathered her up and almost ran from the villa.

Hawke set Caitlin on the broad south lawn and hastily radioed Dom for a pickup.

Tears started streaming down his cheeks as he saw how fast Caitlin was failing. He stroked her hair softly and searched her eyes for reassurance, for some sign of the fight to survive where others hadn't.

"I thought…thought I…was gonna be the one. The one to…prove," Cait choked out.

"You are the one, Honey. Why do you think I pushed you away for so long? I couldn't, wouldn't believe I'd found you. Don't leave me Cait. Caitlin?"

As Caitlin lost consciousness, Airwolf descended from the sky like a saving angel, her white underbelly gleaming in the breaking dawn.

~~~AW~~~

Hawke startled awake, sweat glistening over his body. His breathing was ragged with emotion. He shook his head and rubbed his hands over his face trying to dislodge the images of the dream, nightmare, before looking over to the other side of his bed. It was empty. Frowning, he sighed deeply before pushing away the covers his feet were entangled in and making his way to the bathroom.

He couldn't go on this way. He knew from his experience after 'Nam that the dreams would subside in time. He wasn't sure he had that time.

Looking up from the sink, he grabbed a towel and began patting his face dry when his eyes caught the face looking back at him in the mirror. The haunted blue eyes took in his haggard appearance. He needed a shave, and a haircut. Cait had always liked his hair short and complained of whisker burn whenever he hadn't shaved.

He grabbed the brush and mug beside the faucet and began to try and make himself presentable.

He arrived early at the airfield. The cabin felt empty without Caitlin and he found the airfield a little more welcoming. The old Steerman, a source of constant frustration, now served as a reminder of the day Caitlin sought him out. How happy he'd been to see her. The sink in the corner reminded him of her brushing her teeth and his denial of Airwolf's existence. There were other happy memories, a few sad ones too, but with work he could block those out. He'd already had two cups of coffee by the time Jo and Dom arrived.

Jo Santini, Dom's niece, was helping out while she was between jobs. Dom continued to urge her to stay. She'd picked up the trip to Vegas for the female design team that Cait had invited him on. Jo liked being paid to visit Vegas and the odd stunt job was interesting, but she waivered until Dom introduced her to Airwolf and began training her. Hawke had not been pleased, but couldn't argue with what was already begun besides Jo was family, practically a sister. He couldn't deny how happy it made Dom to have her around. And, she had done well on the one mission they'd needed a third person.

_Hell_, he thought, _anything to keep Caitlin safe when she comes back, if she comes back_.

She had been pulling away before the shooting, and now…Now she was recovering from a fractured pelvis. She was still in a therapy center. While she was making steady progress on the physical front, Hawke still wasn't sure where she was on the emotional one.

That Caitlin would risk her own life to save his, he'd somehow never questioned. That she would do so to spare him having to make a choice, staggered him. This revelation made their conversations awkward. He felt they were making progress, but struggled to regain the intimacy they'd shared.

Unconsciously, he slipped his hand into his pocket and fingered the small ring he kept there. _Would it make a difference?_ He had to believe it would. He had been waiting for the right time, but maybe the right time wouldn't come. Or…maybe he just needed to make the time right.

Hawke decided to do just that right after the early morning test flight with Jo. They were testing some new gizmo that sounded complicated. He'd have to ask Jo about it later while they were in the air. Right now he had some planning to do. He wasn't going to waste any more time with Caitlin.

The Airwolf episode 'Blackjack' follows.


End file.
